[ Melina ] Ron and Don are searching the building and Snitsky said that no one has left the parking garage since your match.. So Mike Sanders, that meathead Jindrak, and his little slut are still on the property...
-[[ There's pain in Jarrett's voice. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Good... I want'em found at any and all costs..
[ Melina ] No one is entering or leaving the premises without us knowing.. Sanders is as good as finished.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Kid wants to make an impact.. I got a feelin' he's gonna make several when we find his ass..
-[[ A walkie-talkie begins rumbling on Melina's side.. She grabs it and speaks. ]]-
[ Melina ] What is it, Harris? Did you find him?
-[[ Static... Then the voice of Don Harris. ]]-
[ Don Harris ] We think we've found where he's hidin'.. We're waitin' on Snitsky 'fore we make a move..
[ Melina ] Okay, I'll be right down. Don't do anything until I get there!!
-[[ No answer. She clips the walkie-talkie back on her belt. ]]-
[ Melina ] Jeff, we've got him..
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Bring'im to me..
[ Melina ] Will do.
-[[ She turns and runs out the door, leaving Jarrett, Christian, and the EMT by themselves... The EMT finishes his job and allows Jarrett to wipe his face, removing most of the blood that had stained his features.. The EMT leaves the room.. Jarrett looks over at Christian who hasn't said a word since the title match.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Turn'at frown upside down, Christian.. You're a champion again.. For the fourth time!!
-[[ Christian raises an eyebrow, not seeming very impressed with the accolade. ]]-
[ Christian ] Question, Jeff...
-[[ Christian looks like this question is eating at him. ]]-
[ Christian ] When you put yourself in that tag match... You knew I wanted Edge, didn't you?
-[[ Jarrett almost laughs out loud and looks over at the belts. ]]-
[ Christian ] You just wanted to be a double champion again.
-[[ Jarrett nods. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Ya' got me.
[ Christian ] I knew it.
-[[ Christian even seems to be looking at the bright side of the situation now.. He stands up and stretches.. A smile stretching across his face.. He now sounds a bit more excited to have gold again. ]]-
[ Christian ] I guess sharing the tag team titles with the world champion isn't the worst thing that could've happened.. And hell, look at us, it's like we're ever gonna lose these things.. So maybe I can break another record... You know, the one I already hold for the longest tag team title reign EVER....
-[[ Christian nods as Jarrett just seems glad that Christian isn't upset anymore. ]]-
[ Christian ] That's not too bad at all, actually.. Hey, watch the belts, I've got a few things I need to take care of..
[ Jeff Jarrett ] No problem, they're in good hands..
-[[ Christian turns and walks out of the room.. And no more than a few seconds after he's gone, Dave Batista walks into the room.. He pulls a steel chair over next to Jarrett's and sits down... Batista begins eyeballing the pair of tag team titles that rest on the table next to Jarrett..... Jarrett looks at the belts then back at Batista.. He doesn't get it. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] What's wrong, Dave?
-[[ Dave seems genuinely concerned. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] The boys are talkin'...
-[[ Jarrett looks to be in total disbelief. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] About what?
-[[ Batista eyeballs the title belts. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] It's not good for business, Jeff..
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Oh, come on, Dave..... It's just the damn tag team titles!!
-[[ Batista puts his hands up in mock defense... ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] I didn't say you had to do anything about it.. I'm just saying.. The boys are talkin'.. And you as well as I do.. It doesn't look good for the owner of the company to be putting all the gold on himself...
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Then I'll just let Christian pick a new partner...
[ Dave Batista ] ........Or his friends.
-[[ Jeff looks defeated. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Hell, Dave... We won'em fair and square, you saw that!!
-[[ Batista raises an eyebrow now. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Fair and square? There were ten guys in the ring at any given time..
[ Jeff Jarrett ] You were one of'em!!
[ Dave Batista ] That's how I know.. But the boys are talkin'.. So you gotta neutralize this situation..
-[[ Jarrett grabs the tag team titles off of the table and looks at them.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] You want me to give'em up? Is that what you're sayin'?
[ Dave Batista ] I'm not sayin' you gotta do a damn thing.. It IS your company, after all.
-[[ Jarrett shakes his head and stands up and is noticeably wobbly from the chairshot from Mike Sanders... Jarrett grabs the second title and walks to the dressing room door.. Batista follows him out... Jarrett looks around at the wrestlers and he finds most of them are giving him a harsh staredown..... Jarrett motions for two of them to come to him... ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Hey, you, Kennedy!! You and fat boy come over here..
-[[ Ken Kennedy and The Big Show look at each other.. Talk it over for a second and then make their way to where Jarrett and Batista are standing.... Jarrett begins explaining.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] You two've been doin' a hell of a job.. And I just wanted to reward ya'll with a little somethin'...
[ Dave Batista ] And after the way you kicked my ass tonight, you deserve it, guys.. Really.
-[[ Kennedy smiles nervously, suddenly expecting this to turn into a beat down but his fears are forgotten when Jarrett hands one tag title to him and the other to Big Show.. They both look to be in utter disbelief that Jarrett is doing this right here and right now..... Kennedy is the only one to speak. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] I really appreciate this, Jeff.. I mean, this is, indeed, one of the crowning achievements of my long...... AND ILLUSTRIOUS........ Career.... Thank you..
-[[ Big Show smiles, obviously getting an ego trip from this. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Now, ya'll do'em proud.. There's a lot o'history behind them belts.
[ Ken Kennedy ] Mister Jarrett, I can promise and assure you... That without a doubt.. When these Solid Gold Wrestling... WORLD..... Tag Team Championships are defended.... The only thing you'll be hearing.. AFTER THE MATCH....... IS....... AND THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH........... AND STILLLLLLLLLLLLL.... WORLD... TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSSSSS......... THE BIG SHOW!! AND MISTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR KEEEEEEENNNNNNEEEEEDDDDDDYYYYYYYYY!!!
-[[ Kennedy roars as Jarrett just smiles blankly at him.. Big Show remains smiling.. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] ...........KENNEDYYYYYYYYYY!
[ Jeff Jarrett ] It better be.. Now hightail it, boys, me and Dave got business to attend to.
-[[ Kennedy and Show walk away and Batista clamps a hand down on Jarrett's shoulder. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] That was admirable, boss.
-[[ Jarrett just nods.. And before he can say another word, Maria runs onto the scene.. She looks really upset and has a microphone in her hand... She stops at Batista and looks up at him with a scared look in her eyes.. ]]-
[ Maria ] Dave Batista... Reliable sources have just informed me, MARIA.. Hey, that's me!! HA HA~!
-[[ She giggles loudly but then quickly puts her serious face back on.. ]]-
[ Maria ] But I have just heard... That Ric Flair, your best friend, has been involved in a horrible limousine accident on his way to the show tonight...... How does that make you feel?
-[[ Batista stares at her, no emotion on his face. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Are you serious?
-[[ She just nods. Batista grabs his cell phone and dials the number... He quickly shuts the phone and puts it back in his pocket.. He looks at Jarrett with a sudden hint of worry on his face. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] The line is dead.
-[[ Maria laughs. ]]-
[ Maria ] HA HA~! Well, no duh, silly, there's no cord attached to that phone!!
-[[ Batista totally ignores her.. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Jeff, I have to go..
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Well, hell, GO, Dave.. Do what ya' gotta do!!
-[[ Batista doesn't say another word, he leaves Jarrett and Maria alone to find out more about Flair's car accident... Maria now openly pouts.. Her interview is ruined.. ]]-
[ Maria ] Oh, man... I didn't get my scoop!
-[[ She kicks at the ground.. Carlito approaches her, clutching an apple in his hand.. He's got a smug look on his face. ]]-
[ Carlito ] You want a scoop? Heh heh... Then you're in luck.. Because Carlito... Has got the scoop..
-[[ Maria looks suddenly excited and puts the microphone in Carlito's face. ]]-
[ Carlito ] And the scoop is... If Ric Flair has been in a limousine accident.. Then dat...... DAT'S COOL!
-[[ Carlito laughs and walks away as Maria looks on... She leaves as well, leaving Jarrett by himself again... Christian returns with a cocky swagger back in his step that was missing earlier.. He slaps Jarrett on the back and Jarrett suddenly becomes uncomfortable, realizing Christian doesn't know what's happened since he left.. ]]-
[ Christian ] So, Jeff.. Who do you think we're gonna defend those beauties against first?
-[[ Jarrett laughs a dry laugh. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Christian.. We need to talk..
Jarrett begins to
explain as we fade out.
Orton & "Cowboy" Bob Orton versus
Michael Shane & Traci Brooks
Title on the Line: None
Stipulation: Mixed Tag Team Match
Referee: Scott James
Winner: Randy Orton & "Cowboy" Bob Orton via Pin Fall
[ Dave Batista ] RIC!! RENA!! Oh my God....... RIC!!
-[[ A police officer tries to stop him.. ]]-
[ Officer ] Sir, we've tried, the door is jammed shut.. The wreckage is too much for us to even see inside the limousine.. We don't even know if the people inside are alive or dead!! You have to step away and let us do our job!!
[ Dave Batista ] No... YOU step aside!!
-[[ And Batista rips the back door off the hinges and throws it down on the pavement.. Smoke erupts from the opening and Batista has to cover his face.. He quickly takes a look inside and immediately turns away, drops to his knees, and begins vomiting...... ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Not like this.... Christ....... Not like this...
-[[ A plopping sound can be heard coming out of the limousine door now... The cops take notice, and once Batista is finished losing his lunch, he turns around and sees the source of the plopping..... His eyes go wide.. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] ........Worms?
-[[ The Boogeyman emerges from the smoke, covered in worms, dirt, blood, and broken glass, as if he was in the vehicle when it crashed and somehow survived..... He smiles and begins singing to Batista, who can only stare. ]]-
[ The Boogey Man ] The wheels on the busssss... Go round and round...... Round and round........ Round and round...... The wheels on the bussss go... Round and round......... ALLLLLLL... OVA'.... TOWWWWWWWN!!! HA HA HA!!
-[[ The Boogey Man opens his mouth and vomits blood in Batista's face.. ]]-
[ The Boogey Man ] AH'M THE BOOGEY MAN!! ......AND AH'M COMIN'.... TO GET YA'!!!
-[[ Batista screams an inhuman, blood curdling scream. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
-[[ And the Boogey Man's arms consume Dave Batista and drag him inside the wreckage.. A slight scuffle can be heard and then nothing..... The cops rush over to the door to see what's happened, but their faces just go white... ]]-
[ Officer ] There's no one inside... Nothing... How do we report this.
-[[ The other cop is short with his answer. ]]-
[ Officer #2 ] We don't.
Title on the Line: None
Stipulation: Hardcore Match
Referee: Charles Robinson
Winner: Cactus Jack via Pin Fall
[ Cactus Jack ] BANG! BANG!!
-[[ As Cactus begins to make his way back to the dressing room area, he's stopped by Todd Grisham, the smarmy prick, and he's got a microphone in his hand... He looks a bit nervous to be around Cactus, but regardless, he has a job to do and dammit, he's going to do it...... ]]-
[ Todd Grisham ] Cactus Jack... Cactus Jack.. Can I have a word with you?
-[[ Cactus smiles and puts an arm around Todd's shoulders.. ]]-
[ Cactus Jack ] Sure, Ted..
[ Todd Grisham ] It's... Um... Todd....
-[[ Cactus screams. ]]-
[ Cactus Jack ] DON'T FUCKING CORRECT ME!!!
-[[ And then he falls back on his ass and begins rocking back and forth again.. Todd looks terrified.. ]]-
[ Todd Grisham ] Cactus...... Mick.... You just beat one of the best wrestlers in the entire business.... Aren't you happy?
-[[ Cactus sounds like he's going to cry. ]]-
[ Cactus Jack ] Happy, Todd? Why? Because I managed to inflict more pain on Chris Benoit than he was able to inflict on me? Why should that make me happy? I was the one who wanted the pain, Todd..... Chris Benoit.. He only wanted to deal it out... And now, I've found myself without the pain I desired... And he's found himself unable to stand up for the time being....... So, no, Todd, I'm not happy...... In fact, I'm pretty fucking depressed.. So if you don't mind... I'd really appreciate it.. If you would leave me the hell alone.....
-[[ Todd nods, swallowing hard... He turns around to leave and walks right into the GORE!!! GOOOORE!!! GOOOOOOOORE!!!! Todd Grisham bends in two and flops on the ground like a dead fish!! Rhino doesn't even hesitate, he goes straight to kicking Cactus Jack right in the face!! Rhino begins pummeling him down, punching and kicking away at his head and Cactus was caught so off guard that he can't even defend himself!! And there's a clatter of metal behind Rhino..... Rhino turns around just in time to catch a chair........ VAN DAMINATOR!!!! Rob Van Dam just drove a chair into the face of Rhino!! Rhino goes straight down and doesn't move.... Van Dam helps Cactus to his feet.. ]]-
[ Rob Van Dam ] Hey, man... You okay?
-[[ Cactus spits blood on the floor. ]]-
[ Cactus Jack ] Am I okay? Yes, Rob... I am.. And that....... IS THE PROBLEM!!
-[[ Cactus hauls off and punches Van Dam right in the mouth!! Cactus and Van Dam begin brawling, throwing wild punches at each other and doing their best to injure each other... SGW Security floods the area and pulls the two apart.. Rhino gets up and is also swamped by security and isolated....... As these men are pulled apart, screaming at each other, another man watches from a crack in the janitor's closet door and laughs....... ]]-
[ Edge ] Idiots.
-[[ He opens the door further and steps out.. He zips his fly and straightens his hair a bit.. There's a cocky swagger in his step.. Seconds after he walks out, Stacy Keibler follows him out, wiping her face with a tissue.. Her clothes are disheveled and she's obviously just been taken over the edge in the closet.... She throws the tissue on the floor.. ]]-
[ Stacy Keibler ] God, Edge... Why do you always have to do that?
-[[ Edge laughs and puts an arm around her. ]]-
[ Edge ] Because I do what I wanna do.. When I wanna do it...
-[[ She still seems irritated. ]]-
[ Edge ] You should be grateful.. There's a million other girls that would give their arms and legs to get what I've done to you on a daily.. And nightly....... Hell, almost HOURLY basis... Ha ha... Ever since I took you from that uptight, sexually transmitted disease dictionary, Venis... You're better off.. So stop your bitchin'...
-[[ As she begins to reply, Edge is BLASTED from behind by.... HOLY SHIT..... VAL VENIS!!!!! Val Venis beats down Edge and Stacy Keibler is screaming loudly for Venis to stop!! Venis throws Edge into the wall, punches him in the face and whips him around and slams him THROUGH THE JANITOR'S CLOSET DOOR!! Venis punches away at Edge's head and reaches down and picks up the mop bucket......... AND DUMPS THE FILTHY MOP WATER ALL OVER EDGE!! Edge starts to pick himself up and Venis pulls back... And kicks him right in the face!! Venis turns around and stares Stacy right in the face...... ]]-
[ Val Venis ] I'M BACK!!!!!
-[[ She looks scared to death to see him..... He sees security rushing to take him out of the building.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] SOLID GOLD WRESTLING'S PROUDEST SON....... IS BAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!
-[[ He runs out the door and dives into the back of a limousine and is whisked away before security can touch him.. Edge crawls out of the janitor's closet, soaking wet.... Edge is shaking with anger..... ]]-
[ Edge ] YOU WANNA END ME!? I.... AM....... FAR......... FROM ENDED!!!!!
Edge gets up and grabs
Stacy and storms out of the building with her.. Holy God, Val Venis has
Title on the Line: None
Referee: Jimmy Cordaris
Winner: Lance Storm via Pin Fall
[ Vince Russo ] This is tha' shit you don't fuck with, bay-bee...
-[[ And female hands reach around him and begins massaging his chest.. He looks surprised. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] Whoa.. Whoa.. What tha' FUCK!?
-[[ He turns around and comes face to face with Traci Brooks... She licks her lips and pulls him close.. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] What tha' fuck.. Traci!? What.. What are ya' doin' in tha' men's room?
[ Traci Brooks ] Isn't it obvious, Vinnie? Seeing what you did to Michael Shane... Turned.. Me... On..
[ Vince Russo ] It did?
-[[ She begins rubbing his face and pulls hers close to his. ]]-
[ Traci Brooks ] See... It only took a couple of weeks.. And an....
-[[ She moves her neck from side to side, there's a slight pop. ]]-
[ Traci Brooks ] ...RKO... But I think I finally figured out how things work around here... And I do want to be successful, Vinnie... I really do... And if that means ditching Michael Shane... For a real man.....
-[[ Russo snickers.. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] And I am a real man, bay-bee.. All man...
[ Traci Brooks ] Then I'm all for it......
-[[ She leans back and opens her top, revealing a massive amount of cleavage.. Russo immediately creams his pants. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] God damn, those are some great tits!!
-[[ She moves to the side and Russo opens his eyes.... And finds himself face to face with Michael Shane. ]]-
[ Michael Shane ] You're an idiot.
-[[ SUPER KICK!! Russo spins and spits blood all over the mirror behind him.. And then Traci kicks him right in the testicles!! Russo yells in pain and Michael Shane yanks him up by his shirt..... Shane's face is swollen from the bat shot earlier, making him especially frightening looking. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] Fuck.. Fuck...... My fuckin' nuts..... Bitch.. You got a wide foot.. You got'em both...
-[[ Blood pours out of Russo's mouth... ]]-
[ Michael Shane ] That's two times... Two weeks in a row you and your lackeys have kept me from getting my hands on Randy Orton... First, you rob me of the television title.... Then you let that asshole hurt Traci.... This isn't about me and Orton anymore, Russo......... This is me and you... UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL!!
-[[ Shane flings Russo around and forces him into the door of one of the stalls... And the stall door doesn't budge.. It's locked..... There's someone inside...... There's a rustling of toilet paper... A zipping of pants... Someone is standing up.. Russo is whimpering and Michael Shane is standing over him, not even paying attention to the noise...... The lock on the stall clicks....... And the door opens... ]]-
[ Michael Shane ] You've gotta be kidding me..
-[[ The Undertaker pulls his sun glasses down to the tip of his nose, revealing his eyes to the rookie, Shane. ]]-
[ The Undertaker ] Kiddin' ya', son.. Nah... Killin' ya'? That's another story.
-[[ And the Undertaker punches Shane right in the face.. Shane goes reeling backward against the counter.. Undertaker is already on him and he lifts him in the air..... And lawn darts him into the large mirror!! Glass goes everywhere and Michael Shane is a bloody mess... Traci Brooks is screaming and is cowering in the corner as the Undertaker goes to work on Michael Shane, who can't even defend himself anymore.. He grips Shane around the throat and Shane is just gushing blood from all over his back and face...... And he choke slams him through the stall door and straight through the toilet!! Porcelain, water, and blood goes all over the place....... The Undertaker smirks and looks over at Traci.. ]]-
[ The Undertaker ] Stop that screamin', woman!! 'Fore I give you somethin' to scream about.. You hear me!?
-[[ Russo grabs Taker's pants and pulls himself up to his knees... ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] Oh God.. God damn... Thank you....... Thank you..
The Undertaker doesn't even say a word.. He just walks out of the
bathroom, leaving Russo to lay on the floor in pain and Traci Brooks
screaming for EMTs to come help Michael Shane..
Title on the Line: None
Stipulation: Raven's Rules
Referee: Scott James
OH! OHHHHHH! SHAAAAAAAAWN!!!
-[[ The fans erupt as Shawn Michael walks out onto the stage with a microphone in his hand..... Chyna emerges from the back and stands silently behind him.. Michaels has a smug look on his face as he raises the microphone... Murdoch and Raven are just staring at him... ]]-
[ Shawn Michaels ] You can't be serious..
-[[ He's almost laughing out loud at the two men in the ring. ]]-
[ Shawn Michaels ] This is Solid Gold Wrestling? These two stiffs couldn't lift my jock.. Yet they're getting this television time.. While I.. H... B... K... THE HEART BREAK KID... Have to sit in the back and watch the fans sit on their hands.. When they know damn well, I'm the one guy in this company.. That can give'em what they paid for!!
-[[ The fans begin cheering him on as he continues.. He looks over at Chyna.. ]]-
[ Shawn Michaels ] So, after much deliberation on our behalf.. We've decided to make this match... Oh... ME THINKS...... A TRIPLE THREAT!!
The fans erupt and
Michaels charges the ring...... Two seconds in, he floors Trevor Murdoch
with a throat crushing SUPER KICK!! Raven charges at Michaels and kicks
him in the gut.... AND HE DROPS WITH THE EVENFLOW!! But Michaels just
remains standing, no-selling the move!! Raven looks shocked and he stands
up...... SWEET CHIN MUSIC!! Michaels slumps over Raven backwards like this
has been the match of his life...... One!! TWO!! THREEEEEEEE!! Shawn
Michaels has just made an impact in Solid Gold Wrestling!!
Winner: Shawn Michaels via Pin Fall
[ Maria ] Whoa.. Holy.. WOW~!! .......Who are you?
-[[ Mike Sanders grits his teeth, hoping to choke off anything he might say in anger.. Mark Jindrak just shakes his head.. Torrie consoles Sanders by rubbing his arm... Sanders, cooled off slightly, speaks. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] You got a microphone?
-[[ Maria looks around and grabs her microphone from beside her. She begins nodding frantically. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] Well, if you've got a microphone... I've got sometin' to say, darlin'!!
-[[ Sanders looks around, surveying his surroundings.. He nods to Jindrak. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] Keep an eye out, Mark..
-[[ Maria's own eyes go wide now. ]]-
[ Maria ] Cool!! How did you learn how to do that?
-[[ Sanders looks confused. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] The hell are you talkin' about?
[ Maria ] Not you, stupid, HIM! How'd you learn to take out your eyes!?
-[[ Jindrak looks confused now... Sanders yanks the microphone out of her hand. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] You know what, this interview is over, honey.. So, scoot!!
-[[ Sanders acknowledges the camera. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] Sanders, mic, camera, mic, Sanders!!
-[[ He looks her dead in the face. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] We don't NEED you!!
-[[ She immediately looks like someone just shot her favorite puppy and begins bawling.. Jindrak leans over and pushes Maria out of the frame.. Sanders turns to the camera now and gives it his full attention. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] For anybody watching the show up 'til this point, you know that tonight.. Well, it just hasn't been my night!! I've been insulted since I walked in the damn door!! I've had my manhood ridiculed.. I've had my talent questioned.. And I've had my credibility shot straight to hell by that acoustic asshole, Jeff Jarrett!!
-[[ Sanders spits as he talks. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] HELL NO, NOT ANYMORE!!
-[[ Jindrak nods, a smug look on his face. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] Tonight, they all took a shot.. And dammit, I've shot back!! I beat Kurt Angle.. One of the best wrestlers in this damn business!! And I wrapped a steel chair around the head of our oh-so-prestigious world champion!! AND NOW!? NOW!? I'm a wanted man!! EVERYBODY WANTS A PIECE OF MIKE SANDERS!! HOW YOU LIKE THAT!?
-[[ Applause can be heard now from off to the side... Sanders turns around and immediately goes on the defensive.. It's Melina, being flanked by the Harris Brothers and Gene Snitsky... She has a big smile on her face and she continues applauding... Sanders, Jindrak, and Torrie all look ready to fight if they have to... ]]-
[ Melina ] Bravo... Bravo, Mike... But what are you trying to prove with your little rebellion?
-[[ She laughs. ]]-
[ Melina ] How easy it is to get yourself killed?
-[[ She walks right up to him.. No fear at all.. ]]-
[ Melina ] Because after what you did to Jeff, you have to know you're not leaving here on your own two feet..
-[[ Snitsky growls. ]]-
[ Gene Snitsky ] I like... Your feet!!
-[[ No one says a word.. Until Melina speaks again. ]]-
[ Melina ] Mike.. You're on borrowed time.. Rebelling against something.... Wait..
-[[ She looks back at the Harris Brothers and Snitsky before looking back at Sanders.... ]]-
[ Melina ] What exactly ARE you rebelling against?
-[[ Sanders smirks. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] Whatever you've GOT.
-[[ And he shoves Melina hard, sending her crashing down onto her ass!! She yells, more in anger than pain, and Sanders, Jindrak, and Torrie take off running with the Harris Brothers and Snitsky chasing after them... Melina slams her fists onto the ground as she sees Sanders, Jindrak, and Torrie disappear inside of a rental car and drive away.. Leaving her lackeys in the dust... She yells again. ]]-
[ Melina ] DON'T LET THEM GET AWAAAAAAY!! I WANT HIS HEAD!! I WANT HIS HEEEEEEEAD!!!!!!!
She shakes her fists
in rage.. ]]-
Title on the Line: None
Referee: Nick Patrick
Winner: Chris Jericho via Pin Fall
[ Chris Jericho ] That's TWO... AND ZERO... For those of you keeping count...
-[[ The fans begin booing him loudly. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] I was underestimated.. And written off as a job boy when people saw the name Val Venis.. Next to CHRIS JERICHO..... But in the end, the underdog... Only on paper, mind you.. Left that limo-riding, jet plane flying, ass clown screaming on the mat with yet another loss on his record........ And that guy was an SGW legend? If that's the best SGW has to offer........ Then that raises a major question.. A question I asked earlier tonight in not so many words...
-[[ Jericho turns around with a confused look on his face. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] Why has Jeff Jarrett versus Chris Jericho not been announced for Six-String Supremacy yet?
-[[ A huge mixed reaction, as the fans hate both Jarrett and Jericho. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] In two weeks, I have dominated an SGW legend..... And I've absolutely demolished a guy that's supposedly one of the best wrestlers this business has ever seen in Brock Lesnar..... Yet.. Not only do I have less television time and accolades than ass kissing idiots like Randy Orton or Ken Kennedy... But I am shown nothing but total and UTTER....... UTTER disrespect by SGW management........ And before I make this next announcement... I'd like to introduce to all of you....... A group of men... And a woman... That have also been crapped all over by Solid Gold management.....
-[[ The boos already are raining in heavier and heavier on Jericho... He points to the ramp... ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] Ladies and gentlemen...... Get on your feet..... FOR LANCE STORM!! MAJOR GUNNZ!! "PRIMETIME" ELIX SKIPPER!! AND "THE CANADIAN CAREER KILLER" MIKE AWESOME!!! TEAM....... CANADAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
-[[ The Canadian National Anthem hits to a loud round of boos as Team Canada walks out onto the ramp... Mike Awesome waves a large Canadian flag around behind the group with an overly excited look on his face....... They all march to the ring as the fans rain garbage down on them and on Jericho inside the ring..... Once all the members of Team Canada have entered the ring, Jericho proceeds to speak again. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] Look at these guys... Look at me!! All of us are great wrestlers.. The best in this whole stinkin' business.. But what are we doing every week? Getting harassed red, white, and bald mongoloids.. Being interviewed by big-boobed water heads in the back.. And being put on the back burner while talentless... AMERICANS.... Like Randy Orton.. Ken Kennedy.. And the Big Show.. Are handed the world on a silver platter... Can someone say... Conspiracy?
-[[ Team Canada nods in agreement.... Jericho goes to continue when Kurt Angle's music hits to a huge pop.. Kurt Angle walks out onto the ramp with a microphone in his hand...... Jericho and Team Canada stand and wait as he raises the microphone and begins to speak.. ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] Hold on just a second, buddy..... No one cares about any announcement YOU have to make.. Unless you're revealing that you're moving back to Canada... And STAYING THERE.. OH YEAH!! IT'S TRUE!!
-[[ Huge pop for the lame joke.. Jericho and Team Canada do not look amused.. ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] Here's a real announcement.... And that announcement is... My Olympic gold medals are still missing.. Someone stole them..... And I think someone in that ring right now took'em out of my locker room!! And I want to know which one of you did it right now, MISTER!!
-[[ Storm suddenly looks frustrated... He takes a microphone from Jericho.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Kurt.. I told you.. No one in Team Canada has even been INSIDE of your dressing room..
[ Kurt Angle ] Well, I'm telling you that you're a BIG FAT LIAR!! LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FREAKIN' FIRE!!
-[[ Awesome yanks the microphone out of Storm's hand. ]]-
[ Mike Awesome ] I'LL LIGHT YOUR PANTS ON FIRE, ANGLE!! YEAH!! YOUR FUCKIN' PANTS!! GOIN' UP IN FUCKIN' SMOKE!! RIGHT HERE!! RIGHT HERE!! YEAAAAAAAH!!!
-[[ Angle raises an eyebrow, as even Team Canada and Jericho don't seem to understand Awesome's outburst.. Storm takes the microphone back... He speaks calmly to Angle this time.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Kurt.. One more time.. We've not seen your medals.. So leave..
-[[ Kurt kicks at the ground, beaten again.. He turns to leave and finds himself face to face on the ramp with Petey Williams and Scott D'Amore... Angle looks confused for a second..... And then...... Oh my God, NO... KICK WHAM CANADIAN DESTROYER ON THE STAGE!!!!! KURT ANGLE'S NECK CRUNCHES UP LIKE AN ACCORDION!! ANGLE IS DEAD!! ANGLE IS DEAD!! Petey Williams sits up with a smile on his face....... Storm is now really annoyed.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Petey..... This doesn't change anything.. I told you earlier tonight.. You are NOT welcome.. In Team Canada... And that statement.. Still.. Stands......
-[[ D'Amore hands Petey a microphone...... Petey is still smiling. ]]-
[ Petey Williams ] That's fine, Lance... Because I don't need your Team Canada.. Because I'm going to start a Team Canada of my own!! And my Team Canada... Is already better than your Team Canada...... And do you wanna know why?
-[[ Storm and Jericho can't believe this guy is pulling this stunt right here and now... But Petey Williams reaches into the front of his tights... He fishes around for a bit... And pulls something out of his tights..... And then it's dangling from his hand....... KURT ANGLE'S GOLD MEDALS!! But wait.. There's something different about them...... There's little Maple Leaf stickers on the medals!! Petey and D'Amore laugh loudly as Petey yells into the microphone... ]]-
[ Petey Williams ] Because unlike you, Lance Storm.. I'm a real Canadian HERO!! And I've got the medals to prove it!!
-[[ Chris Jericho takes the microphone from Storm. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] That's nice, jack-off, but I care about you and those medals like I care about Val Venis' big return tonight... Not at all... So drag your hobbit looking ass back up the ramp and disappear.. And let the stars of this show finish what they started--
-[[ As those words exit Jericho's mouth, he's nailed from behind by CHRIS BENOIT!! Benoit nails Jericho with a German suplex!! Awesome, Storm, and Skipper swarm on Benoit, but as soon as they do... The lights go out!! And when they come back on........ VAMPIRO IS IN THE RING!! What? Why!? Everyone kind of freezes, not knowing what to expect... Until Vampiro turns to Mike Awesome...... And SPEWS BLOOD IN HIS FACE!! "FUCK!! FUCK!! MY FUCKIN' EYES!! YOU GOT IT IN MY FUCKIN' MOUTH!!" Awesome topples over the top rope and to the outside as Vampiro begins.... HELPING CHRIS BENOIT!! CANADIAN VAMPIRE!! VAMPIRO IS A CANADIAN VAMPIRE!! Petey Williams rushes the ring..... He grabs Elix Skipper...... CANADIAN DESTROYER!!!!!! Storm and Jericho are fighting back with everything they have.... And then..... "MY WORLD" HITS!!! The fans erupt in boos and the action in the ring stops immediately... Jeff Jarrett walks out onto the ramp with Randy Orton, Ken Kennedy, The Big Show, the Harris Brothers, and Gene Snitsky behind him.... Jarrett has a microphone in his hand....... He begins speaking. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Now hold on just a second!!
-[[ Jarrett takes a few more steps down the ramp, leaving his boys on the stage.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] I see we're on the verge of a civil war.. And ya' know what... I don't give a damn!! All of you can kill each other for all I care because as far as I'm concerned, the only person SGDubya needs to survive...... IS ME!!
-[[ The fans boo even louder. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And I was content with lettin' you bunch o'idiots take each other out.. But somebody just had to go and name drop the world champion...... And Chris Jericho, I'm talkin' to YOU!! I told ya' earlier tonight that your ass didn't deserve a world title shot.. And as long I'm ownin' this damn, stinkin' company, you ain't NEVER gonna get one!!
-[[ Jarrett smiles. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And that's not because you're Canadian......
-[[ Jarrett points at the ring with two fingers as the group behind him laughs... ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] It's because.. YOU SUCK!!
-[[ Jericho throws a huge fit in the ring.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] But now's not the time for statin' them facts..... It's time to talk about what's happenin'.. NEXT WEEK.. On another LIVE EDITION OF SGDUBYA SHOCK!! Brought to ya' by the one and only.. "Six-String Samurai" JEFF JARRETT!!!!! The World Champion... And OWNER.. Of this damn promotion......
-[[ The fans continue booing loudly as both factions of Team Canada look on, interested. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And first.. We're gonna see... "The Canadian Superstar" Lance Storm... Goin' toe to toe.. With "The Canadian Crippler" CHRIS BENOIT!! And it ain't just no ordinary match... It's gonna be a submission match!! Because that's all you Canadians know how to do..... Is that borin' old grapplin' junk... So knock yourselves out...
-[[ More boos as Storm and Benoit suddenly lock eyes.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And hey you, Canadian Vampire... Yeah, you, Vampiro... You're gonna go one on one with a Canadian yourself... And that Canadian... Is CHRISTIAN!! But the odds seem a little stacked there... I mean.. One o'you just ain't on the same level as the other....... So I'm gonna stick Trish Stratus on Christian's team to balance things out a little bit... Trish Stratus and Christian... Versus Vampiro!!
-[[ Vampiro shows no emotion, just staring down the ramp at Jarrett. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And Chris Jericho... You wanna complain about Ken Kennedy and Randy Orton havin' titles handed to'em? Well, I'm gonna give you the opportunity to TAKE some o'that gold from'em next week...... It's gonna be Chris Jericho.. Versus Randy Orton.. For the television championship!!
-[[ Surprisingly, a big pop, as Orton stands there, looking smug with the title on his shoulder.. Jericho makes the title belt motion around his own waist.. Saying that the belt will be his...... Then Jarrett clears his throat. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Wait, scratch that.. Chris Jericho versus Ken Kennedy.. And since Kennedy is a tag champion, I guess there ain't gonna be no titles on the line... And that... That's TOUGH LUCK, Jericho!! HA HA!!
-[[ Everyone laughs at Jericho.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] No, see.. Randy Orton's gonna be facin' off against Petey Williams.. And since Petey Williams ain't a big enough star to make this match worth a damn, I'm gonna throw in The Rock and Steve Austin, make it a little four way elimination action... And then throw a little dash of non-title on top of it... Because ya'll three just ain't earned a title shot yet!!
-[[ Jarrett then turns around and places a hand on Ken Kennedy's shoulder... He speaks again. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] By the way.. Speaking of Ken Kennedy.. Have you met my tag team champions, Jericho?
-[[ Big Show takes a step up next to Kennedy and Jarrett.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Chris Jericho.. Meet Big Show and Ken Kennedy........ Ken.. Show... KILL CHRIS JERICHO!!
-[[ Kennedy and Big Show laugh and begin storming down the ramp, discarding their titles on the way down.. Before they even get to the ring, Jarrett speaks again. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Oh, how rude of me... Snitsky.. Ron and Don... Randy..... You guys kill the rest of'em!!
-[[ They all laugh and run down as well.. Everyone hits the ring at once and a massive brawl starts!! Ken Kennedy and Jericho punch away at each other.. Mike Awesome is going toe to toe with the Big Show!! They're just punching away at each other like crazy!! Gene Snitsky is pummeling Vampiro into the ground.. The Harris Brothers lift up Elix Skipper... H-BOMB!!!!!! Ron Harris turns around.... SUPER KICK ON RON HARRIS BY LANCE STORM!! Storm turns around into a BIG BOOT FROM SNITSKY!! Chris Jericho nails Kennedy with an enziguri and drops him like a bad habit!! And Jericho jumps out of the ring... Is he leaving his crew behind!? NO!! HE'S GOING AFTER JARRETT!! Jericho charges at Jarrett... And is mobbed from the side by CHRISTIAN!! Christian whips Jericho into the apron and begins punching away at him.. Jericho is fighting back like crazy, but Christian's not giving him anything... And Jericho low blows him!! Christian drops to his knees and Jericho pie faces him and goes back after Jarrett.. Jarrett's backing up the ramp from him, shaking his head... And when he reaches the stage... Jericho stops dead in his tracks....... THE UNDERTAKER EMERGES FROM THE BACK!! Jericho looks like he's going to chance it...... And just as he takes a step forward, Christian grabs him from behind...... UNPRETTIER ON THE STAGE!!! The Undertaker just smirks and shakes his head... He walks over to Jericho and pulls his body off the stage and hoists him up on his shoulder..... He walks to the edge of the stage..... Oh shit.. No... OH MY GOD, NO!! TOMBSTONE OFF OF THE STAGE AND ONTO AN ELECTRICAL BOX!!! Sparks go everywhere on impact and Jarrett and Christian just stare in awe at the destruction caused.... Jericho isn't moving... And Undertaker does the DEAD MAN SIT-UP!! The fans are going ape shit over this horrific move the Undertaker just executed...... And back inside the ring, Petey Williams gets dropped with the GREEN BAY PLUNGE!! Randy Orton springs up and nails the RKO on Lance Storm!! Mike Awesome and Vampiro both fall victim to the H-BOMB!! Team Canada has been left completely lying by Jarrett's men!! And Major Gunnz is the last one standing...... She looks scared to death... And RANDY ORTON is sizing her up!! He's looking to take out ANOTHER woman tonight........ She turns around, he prepares to leap...... And he's yanked out of the ring from behind.. He turns around and is face to face with........ ]]-
-[[ CHAVO GUERRERO, JR.!!! ]]-
-[[ CHAVO GUERRERO!! THE FORMER WORLD CHAMPION!! U.S. CHAMPION!! INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION!! CHAVO GUERRERO IS IN RANDY ORTON'S FACE!!! Chavo begins pummeling him with lefts and rights, and the fans are going ballistic!! The Legend Killer has found himself going toe to toe with one of the biggest legends in SGW HISTORY!! Chavo throws him into the guardrail and follows him in with a big clothesline!! Orton slumps on the mat.. And Chavo reaches behind the guardrail.... AND REVEALS PEPE!! HE HAS PEPE!! PEPE IS HERE!!! Orton staggers back to his feet... AND CHAVO FLOORS ORTON WITH PEPE'S STICK!! The rest of Jarrett's crew dive out of the ring and go after Chavo, but Chavo takes off through the crowd, celebrating like he's won another world championship!! ]]-
-[[ Jarrett, Orton, and his crew are left in utter shock as Chavo escapes.. No one expected this to happen!! ]]-
-[[ The show fades out with a shot of Jarrett, Orton, and Christian looking shocked.. ]]-
Jarrett hates Jericho and vice versa, Chavo and Orton, Team Canada versus
Team Canada!! The Undertaker and Kennedy and the Big Show destroying
everything in sight...... WHAT THE HELL IS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT WEEK!?