Date: Sunday, April 16th, 2006 | Live From: Tokyo, Japan | Commentators: Joey Styles & Don Callis
[ Steve Austin ] I jus' got one thing to say to yer ass, Venis...
-[[ There's an irritable tone in Val's voice. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Oh yeah, Steve? What's that?
-[[ Austin's demeanor doesn't change at all.. ]]-
[ Steve Austin ] Good luck tonight.
-[[ They shake hands.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Same to you.
[ Steve Austin ] Don't you worry 'bout ol' Stone Cold..
-[[ Venis smirks. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Of course not.
[ Steve Austin ] Well...
-[[ He rubs the back of his head.. ]]-
[ Steve Austin ] Enough o'this shit.. I got a case to drink 'fore I stomp any ass tonight.
-[[ Austin walks off and Venis picks up his bag.. He turns and enters his dressing room.. Venis drops the bag on the floor and approaches the vanity mirror.. He stares at his reflection for a moment and does not look pleased with what he sees.. He exhales deeply... ]]-
[ Val Venis ] This.. Is what it has all come down to..
-[[ He licks his lips. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Everything I've worked for in this business has led me to tonight..
-[[ A long pause. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Everything or nothing... Everything... Or nothing..
-[[ Venis stares hard into his own face.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Ken Kennedy and Vince Russo.. Misguided personalities that must be put in their place..
-[[ And he clenches his fist.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] And Orton... Randy Orton.. Is a menace that must be stopped.. For good.
-[[ A pause. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] I have been humiliated for too long...
-[[ He breathes the next words through his teeth.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] No more...
-[[ There's a knock on his door.. Venis almost falls out of his chair.. He stands.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Bischoff? That you?
-[[ The voice is barely audible through the door. ]]-
[ Voice ] ..telegram..
-[[ Venis looks disgusted.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Telegram... Yeah, right.. Someone's trying to get the jump on me..
-[[ Venis walks over to a wooden chair in the corner of the room.. He lifts it up and slams it into the ground until it breaks into several pieces.. Venis picks up one of the legs, holding it like a club.. He approaches the door, ready to swing and yanks the door open and finds himself face to face with.... ]]-
[ Johnny ] JOHNAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!
[ Kenny ] KENNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!
[ Mitch ] MITCH!
[ Nicky ] NICKAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!
[ Mikey ] MIKEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! NYAHAHAHAHAHA!!
-[[ They all take standing positions with their arms behind their backs.. ]]-
[ The Spirit Squad ] AND WE'RE.. THE SPIRIT SQUAD!
-[[ Venis raises an eyebrow.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] ...The fuck?
-[[ Mitch stands in the center.. ]]-
[ Mitch ] READEH!? OKAY!
-[[ In unison now.. ]]-
[ The Spirit Squad ] TWO! FOUR! SIX! EIGHT! Who do we appreciate!? ORTON! RAN-RAN-DEE-ORTON!
-[[ And they shout. ]]-
[ The Spirit Squad ] CHARITY CASE!
-[[ And Mitch leads.. ]]-
[ Mitch ] GIMME AN R!
[ The Spirit Squad ] R!
[ Mitch ] GIMME A K!
[ The Spirit Squad ] K!
[ Mitch ] GIMME AN O!
[ The Spirit Squad ] O!
[ Mitch ] What's that spell!?
[ The Spirit Squad ] NEW CHAMPION!
[ Mikey ] YEAH!
[ Kenny ] WOO!
[ Johnny ] GO ORTON!
[ Nicky ] BOOM SHAKA LAKA!
[ Mitch ] READEH! OKAY!
-[[ They assume the position again.. ]]-
[ Nicky ] Val's known for movies that are quite dirty-
[ Kenny ] Randy Orton will beat him.. In a hurry!
[ Mikey ] Then wash his hands! Don't forget to rinse!
-[[ Johnny drops to one knee as he finishes.. ]]-
[ Johnny ] Val's reign ends on the first defense!
[ Mitch ] YEAH!
-[[ Kenny begins doing the cabbage patch for no reason. ]]-
[ Kenny ] OH! OH! OH! FEEL THAT BURN!?
[ Nicky ] DOWN! DOWN! DOWN!
[ Mikey ] VENIS GOIN' DOWN!
[ Kenny ] WOO!
-[[ Venis looks at the club in his hand and shakes his head.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Not worth the time.
-[[ He slams the door in their faces and returns to the center of the room.. He can still hear them screaming and cheering out in the hallway.. Venis looks at the club and smiles.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] I really hope that was supposed to discourage me, Orton...
-[[ He grips the club tighter.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] I really do..
-[[ He turns and throws the club hard into the mirror, shattering it into a thousand pieces.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] Because now........ Now?
-[[ He looks down at his bare hands.. ]]-
[ Val Venis ] I'm really pissed off.
Title on the Line: None
Stipulation: World Warrior Tournament - Round Three
Referee: Charles Robinson
Winner: Chris Masters via Referee's Decision
[ Maria ] JILLIAN! GUESS WHAT!?
-[[ Jillian looks up, having no idea what to expect.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] What?
[ Maria ] No! No! GUESS~!
-[[ Jillian shrugs.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] You came up with the perfect strategy for your match tonight?
-[[ Maria laughs out loud. ]]-
[ Maria ] NOOOO! HA HA~!
-[[ Jillian looks around, confused.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] Well.... What is it?
-[[ Maria clasps her hands together against her chest as she explains. ]]-
[ Maria ] Well, silly, if you didn't check your calendar... TODAY'S EASTER!
[ Jillian Hall ] I know today is Easter.
[ Maria ] Well.. I thought since it was Easter.. I would invite the two guys that Easter represents with all its heart!
[ Jillian Hall ] Okay... Where are they?
-[[ Maria turns to the door.. ]]-
[ Maria ] Come on in, guys!
-[[ The door opens up and in walks.. ]]-
[ Maria ] Jillian.. Say hello to the Easter Bunny!
-[[ A pause.. ]]-
[ Maria ] AND JESUS CHRIST! YAY FOR JESUS!
-[[ A man that's at least six foot six walks in wearing a pink bunny suit with an oversized rabbit head.. Walking beside him is a Japanese man with a badly pasted on beard and a long, white robe.. Maria begins jumping up and down, hugs Jesus and kisses him on the cheek.. ]]-
[ Maria ] GOD BLESS US! .....GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!
-[[ Japanese Jesus begins bowing, smiling, and nodding his head rapidly.. ]]-
[ Jesus Christ ] Oh, yes-ah, yes-ah.. Jesoss loff... Allllll pee-pol... Espesharee da' radies.. Yes-ah..
-[[ Maria turns to Jillian with a hopeful look on her face. ]]-
[ Maria ] Can Jesus wrestle tonight, Jillian!? PLEASE!? PUH-LEASE!?
-[[ Jillian stares blankly.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] ...No.
[ Maria ] Can Snitsky wash his feet?
[ Jillian Hall ] ....Are you joking?
-[[ Maria cocks her head to the side.. ]]-
[ Maria ] ..No? I don't think so... Am I?
-[[ The dressing room door swings open again and Lance Storm barges in.. He looks pissed.. He walks right up to the desk and slams his hands down on the desk.. Jillian looks up at him, slightly annoyed at the way he's carrying himself.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] Yes, Lance?
-[[ He raises his index finger in the air.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] First things first, Jillian.....
-[[ A pause. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Did I walk past Jesus Christ on my way to the desk?
-[[ She nods. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Splendid.. Shall we take bets on how long he lives?
-[[ She smiles.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] Good to see you finally showing a sense of humor.
-[[ He's completely deadpan. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] I don't recall telling a joke.
-[[ Now it's her turn to be serious. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] What do you want, Lance?
-[[ He smirks.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Who is the scheduled referee for my match with "Stone Cold" Steve Austin tonight?
[ Jillian Hall ] Nick Patrick.
-[[ He looks disappointed.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] I demand a new referee.
[ Jillian Hall ] Why?
[ Lance Storm ] I spotted Nick Patrick outside.. Drinking a beer with "Stone Cold" Steve Austin..
[ Jillian Hall ] ..So?
[ Lance Storm ] So? So, he's getting intoxicated on the job.. And fraternizing with the talent.. When it is his duty to be completely unbiased, so as to avoid favoritism during matches.. I will not stand by and allow "Stone Cold" Steve Austin to have an advantage in our match like this..
-[[ A pause. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] I think you should replace him with Jimmy Cordaris.
-[[ She looks up at Storm and crosses her arms.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] Nick Patrick is the scheduled referee for the match, Lance.. It's out of my hands.
[ Lance Storm ] Poppycock. This is an injustice.
-[[ Storm turns and walks away from the desk but stops in front of Maria.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] I will be thankful.. To God.. And Edge and Christian.. If they rid us of you..
-[[ He turns back to Jillian.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] And your pathetic regime..
-[[ Storm begins to walk away when Jesus speaks.. ]]-
[ Jesus Christ ] Yes-ah... Tankfool to God... Becoz our God... Is AWESOME GOD!
-[[ The Easter Bunny turns toward Jesus and you hear the voice from inside the head. ]]-
[ Easter Bunny ] WHAT!? WHAT!?
-[[ He rips the bunny head off.. And MIKE AWESOME IS THE EASTER BUNNY!! ]]-
[ Mike Awesome ] WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU FUCKIN' SAY!? AWESOME GOD!? NOBODY'S MORE AWESOME THAN MIKE FUCKIN' AWESOME!!! FUCK YEAH!! HERE WE GO!! RIGHT HERE!! AWESOME! AWESOME BOMB!!
-[[ He kicks Jesus in the gut... AWESOME BOMB ON THE FLOOR ON JESUS CHRIST, OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!! Jesus lays in as Awesome stands over him and pumps his fists while still wearing the bunny suit.. Lance Storm has stopped at the door and is watching the carnage take place with a look of fear in his eye.. ]]-
[ Mike Awesome ] YEEEAAH!! JESUS COMES BACK ON EASTER! JESUS DIES ON EASTER!! AWESOME!! AWESOME MOTHER FUCKIN' BOMB!! FUCK YEEEEAH!! THE EASTER BUNNY WINS!! EASTER'S ABOUT EASTER EGGS! NOT SOME DOUCHE BAG ON A FUCKIN' CROSS!! YEAH!!
-[[ Jillian rubs her temples, looking like she has a headache.. She stands up.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] Excuse me, everyone...... I need some fresh air.
-[[ She stands and walks out of the room, leaving Maria, Storm, Awesome, and the lifeless Jesus in the office to themselves.. She walks down the hallway and finds the exit door that leads to the parking lot.. She pushes it open and steps outside.. She leans against the wall and looks relieved to have a bit of fresh air... And then the man is on her in seconds, shaking her, squeezing her shoulders... At first, she's too scared to say anything.. ]]-
[ Khosrow Daivari ] JILLIAN HALL!! INSALLAH!! YOU MUST HELP ME!! YOU MUST HELP ME!!
-[[ He's constantly looking around, his suit is torn.. There's dried blood all over his face.. ]]-
[ Khosrow Daivari ] I SAW WHAT HAPPENED TO MUHAMMAD.. I KNOW WHO IS BEHIND THIS!!
-[[ Tears are streaming down his face.. ]]-
[ Khosrow Daivari ] They took me... They took me so I couldn't talk... I know who is behind this.. I know..
-[[ He shrieks.. ]]-
[ Khosrow Daivari ] HE'S BEHIND EVERYTHING!!
-[[ Jillian gets her wits enough to stammer out.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] Who... Who's behind it!?
[ Khosrow Daivari ] He's behind everything.. They said they'd kill me if I talked.. But I escaped.. I got away..
-[[ Tires screech and a hearse tears through the parking lot and comes to a complete stop.. ]]-
[ Khosrow Daivari ] He's heeeeere.........
-[[ All four doors open on the hearse and hooded men, dressed all in black pour out and swarm Daivari.. A hand clasps over Daivari's mouth and he's dragged moaning into the hearse.. The doors shut and he's sped away, leaving no trace of ever being in the area.. Jillian looks in the direction that the hearse disappeared, breathing heavily.. When her cell phone rings, she nearly jumps a foot in the air.. She pulls it out of her pocket and answers it.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] ...Hello?
-[[ The voice on the other is distorted. ]]-
[ Voice ] YoU saW nOthInG.. yOU wiLl NoT spEAk oF tHis..
-[[ A pause. ]]-
[ Voice ] jEsUS cHriST isN't tHE oNLy oNe wHo RiSEs oN eASteR..
[ Jillian Hall ] Who is this?
-[[ The voice ignores her. ]]-
[ Voice ] tOnIGht, yoU enSuRE THe rIgHT thInG gOES doWn..
-[[ A pause.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] What's that?
[ Voice ] sHifT tHe pOWeR... oNe reIGN EnDS... A NEw onE bEGiNs..
[ Jillian Hall ] ..What are you talking about? The world title?
[ Voice ] tHIs iS biGGeR tHaN AnY tItLE...
-[[ She understands now.. ]]-
[ Jillian Hall ] And if I don't?
[ Voice ] tHen THerE wiLL bE mOre liKE haSsAN.. aND BOb oRToN..
-[[ She swallows hard. ]]-
[ Voice ] mORe bROKeN bOdiEs.. moRE blooD.. THe bODy coUnt WIll rISe..
-[[ Another pause. ]]-
[ Voice ] YoU wiLL bE thE fIRst.
Intercontinental Title Battle Royal
John Bradshaw Layfield, AJ Styles, Tommy Dreamer, Chris Jericho, Kurt Angle,
Petey Williams, Shawn Michaels, Raven, The Ultimate Warrior, Christopher Daniels,
Colt Cabana, Booker T.
Title on the Line: None
Stipulation: Last Two Men Standing Do Battle for the
Intercontinental Championship Later in the Night
Referees: Mark Yeaton, Scott James, Jimmy Cordaris
Winners: Raven & John Bradshaw Layfield
[ Edge ] Tonight.. Is the big night, Stace..
-[[ He looks at himself, admiring his own features with a cocky grin.. ]]-
[ Edge ] Christian and I.. We've done everything there is to do in Solid Gold Wrestling.. And tonight.. We do something that everyone else wishes they could do... And, thanks to us.. Will never be able to duplicate...
-[[ He turns his head toward her.. ]]-
[ Edge ] We're going to END... Chavo Guerrero's CAREER! HA HA HA!
-[[ She looks up at him, ignoring what he said. ]]-
[ Stacy Keibler ] Would you have really had sex with Jillian if she let you?
-[[ Edge looks around, surprised that this has come up. ]]-
[ Edge ] Yeah, why?
-[[ Stacy looks down, like this has devastated her.. ]]-
[ Stacy Keibler ] Well... I thought..
-[[ Edge puts his finger under her chin and raises her face up to his.. ]]-
[ Edge ] Babe, don't worry... It was only to get what I wanted..
-[[ He smiles a kind, warm smile. ]]-
[ Edge ] She's not even in your league.
-[[ Stacy smiles. ]]-
[ Stacy Keibler ] ..Really?
[ Edge ] Yeah, really.. Her tits are MUCH bigger than yours.
-[[ Edge turns back to the mirror, smiling.. ]]-
[ Edge ] Better body, too.
-[[ He shrugs. ]]-
[ Edge ] And her voice isn't as annoying as yours.
-[[ Stacy's mouth hangs open in shock.. She's totally destroyed. Edge smells the air. ]]-
[ Edge ] What's that smell? Have you showered since we--
[ Stacy Keibler ] Yes.
-[[ Edge looks disgusted. ]]-
[ Edge ] You smell like a bum's nut sack.
-[[ There's a peck on the wall behind them.. And then a voice. ]]-
[ Christian ] Now, now, big brother.. You keep talkin' like that and sooner or later..
-[[ He looks at Stacy with a cocky smirk.. ]]-
[ Christian ] Somebody's gonna start crying.
-[[ She begins shaking her head, disgusted with Christian.. Edge stands by smiling.. ]]-
[ Christian ] Should I call the waaaaaambulance?
-[[ Christian's smiling like he's laying down the most massive burns ever. ]]-
[ Christian ] I was about to make a run to town later.. Should I pick you up a waaaaaamburger and some French cries?
-[[ Stacy storms out of the room with her face in her hands.. Edge laughs. ]]-
[ Edge ] Slut.
[ Christian ] Idiot.
-[[ Edge and Christian high five like old times.. ]]-
[ Edge ] Are you ready to make history... AGAIN, little brother?
-[[ Christian nods, a serious look on his face. ]]-
[ Christian ] You bet your ass, I am.
[ Edge ] Chavo Guerrero's dream ends tonight... Once.. And for all.
[ Christian ] There's no REAL tag team in Solid Gold Wrestling that can stop us, Edge...
-[[ Christian's voice is ripe with arrogance.. ]]-
[ Christian ] We're definitely not being stopped by a career choker and a halfwit.
-[[ Edge nods, agreeing totally. ]]-
[ Christian ] But I have to admit.. As great as it is being the best tag team EVER in Solid Gold Wrestling....
-[[ Christian looks straight ahead at nothing, like he's gazing into the future.. ]]-
[ Christian ] I want something else..... Something I've been missing...
-[[ Christian smiles and looks down at his bare waist... ]]-
[ Christian ] Something I never lost..
-[[ Edge chuckles.. ]]-
[ Christian ] And after we're done with Chavo Guerrero..
-[[ Christian makes the title belt motion around his waist.. ]]-
[ Christian ] It'll be something.. I'm taking back..
[ Edge ] Brother.... I like it... I like it.. A lot!!
-[[ Christian looks at Edge, a sinister smile on his face.. ]]-
[ Christian ] Of course you do... Because that... Is how I roll.
Cold" Steve Austin versus
Title on the Line: None
Stipulation: Ultimate Submission Match - Thirty Minutes
Referee: Nick Patrick
Winner: "Stone Cold" Steve Austin (?)
[ Randy Orton ] Tonight... My destiny.. Will be fulfilled..
-[[ The belt glimmers in the light.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] You're already mine physically....
-[[ He reaches down and brushes his finger over the large center plate. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] But tonight... You find your true home.. Around my waist..
-[[ He averts his eyes from the title and looks straight ahead at nothing.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] Nothing can stop me.. Not Val Venis.. Not Ken Kennedy..
-[[ He looks down at his clenched fists.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] Not even the nameless bastard who wounded my father....
-[[ He opens his hand and stares into the open palm.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] The future of Solid Gold Wrestling.. Lies in these hands...
-[[ Orton never heard the door to his dressing room open.. But he hears the voice from behind him.. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] Mister Orton.
-[[ Orton turns around, assuming a fighting stance.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] What the hell do you want?
-[[ Kennedy puts his hands up.. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] I've come to talk.
[ Randy Orton ] You have nothing to say to me.... That can't be said in the ring tonight.
-[[ Kennedy smiles.. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] I beg to differ, Orton..
[ Randy Orton ] Oh yeah?
[ Ken Kennedy ] I've come to wish you luck in our match tonight..
-[[ Orton looks skeptical. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] Because as much as I dislike you for your treatment of the Big Show and myself...
-[[ He shrugs. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] I must admit...... I do respect you.
-[[ He busts out laughing. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] Okay.. THAT.. Was a joke.. But seriously, now..
-[[ Orton crosses his arms, looking pissed. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] This better be good.
[ Ken Kennedy ] You and I both have our own agendas tonight, Orton.. I'm with Russo now.. And you, you're still representing Jeff Jarrett... And I do respect that.. Because I still respect the one, true owner of Solid Gold Wrestling.. But the apprentice... Is now......... THE MASTER!
-[[ Kennedy tilts his head back.. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] .......MASTERRRRRRRR!
-[[ Orton reaches down and picks up the world title.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] You're not the master of anyone until you have this around your waist..
-[[ Kennedy laughs.. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] I'll be sure to remember that next time I see a gym bag with a title belt sticking out of it.
-[[ Kennedy puts an L on his forehead with his finger and thumb. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] .....LOSER!
-[[ Orton smiles and looks down... And then he quickly looks back up, a different look in his eye.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] Laugh it up now, Kennedy... Because tonight... If you stand between me and this belt.....
-[[ He takes a step toward Kennedy and stares him right in the eye.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] ..I will kill you.
-[[ Kennedy swallows and backs away toward the door. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] May the best man win.
-[[ Kennedy exits and shuts the door, leaving Orton alone with the title.. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] Don't worry... I will.
HOUR 2 ->