Commentators - Tony Schiavone, Nigel McGuinness, & "Big Poppa Pump" Scott Steiner
The show opens without pyrotechnics or any excitement. We find ourselves in front of the SGW interview backdrop with Jeff Jarrett, Edge, Christian, and Val Venis. All four of them are in three piece suits, dressed for the event. Jarrett starts us off.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the third edition of WrestleBrawl. We've got sixteen huge matches lined for all ya'll but first, we wanted t' get somethin' rather important out o' the way... as all ya'll know, Val Venis had t' turn over his seat on the Championship Committee so that he'd be allowed t' compete for the SGW World Heavyweight Championship in our main event tonight... well, that leaves a vacancy on the Committee 'n considerin' we got quite a few important title matches with a lot o' potential for controversy that might require a vote... well, we can't just lit that chair remain empty any longer.
Jarrett gestures toward Venis.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Seein' as how I respect this man and his opinions... and the way he views the business, I've opted to allow Mr. Venis to choose the person who will replace him on the Committee goin' forward, effective immediately. Val, let's hear it.
Venis clears his throat and steps forward.
[ Val Venis ] After thinking about it over the past couple of weeks, I've come to the conclusion that person who should replace me on the Championship Committee should be someone that has been with Solid Gold Wrestling for years... someone that's experienced greatness... and more importantly, someone who is humble and will always make the right decision based on what's best for business.
He looks down for a moment and then back up at the camera.
[ Val Venis ] Someone with a rich and storied history with the company and holds a very important role to this very day... someone that we can trust. That's why I've chosen this person above all others. This person has never held the SGW World Heavyweight Championship... as a matter of fact, this person has never held any championship in SGW...
The fans buzz with anticipation, wondering where this is going.
[ Val Venis ] But this person is a champion in the hearts of minds of SGW fans all around the world... and of the men standing right here before you today... without further adieu... I give you the person who will be replacing me effective immediately...
He gesture off-camera.
[ Val Venis ] Trish Stratus.
The fans cheer loudly and Trish Stratus walks into the shot in a black dress with a huge smile on her face. She shakes Val's hand. Without another word, Val excuses himself from the scene, no doubt to prepare for his match later tonight. Trish shakes hands with Jarrett, Edge, and Christian. Trish turns and looks into the camera.
[ Trish Stratus ] Thank you! Thank you all so much! I'm honored to receive this opportunity. I've worked alongside Jeff Jarrett, Edge, Christian, and Val Venis since the beginning of my SGW career. I've managed three of those men to SGW World Championships... as all of you know, I've worked diligently to establish the SGW Women's Division and I promise to show that same fortitude and determination when making decisions outside of the Women's Division!
Christian pats her on the shoulder.
[ Trish Stratus ] It's truly an honor.
Before this can go any further, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin walks into the shot. The fans erupt in cheers. The former two-time SGW World Heavyweight Champion looks at everyone standing in front of him. His eyes settle on Jeff Jarrett.
[ Steve Austin ] Jeff.
Jarrett gives Austin a respectful nod.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Steve.
[ Edge ] What's up, Steve?
Austin looks at Edge.
[ Steve Austin ] Edge.
Christian pats Austin on the back.
[ Christian ] How's it hangin', Stone Cold?
Austin glares at Christian. Christian swallows hard.
[ Steve Austin ] Don't touch me.
Christian slowly removes his hand.
[ Steve Austin ] Jeff, I'd like a word with ya'.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] I'm listenin'.
[ Steve Austin ] I'm standin' here right now in front o' you 'n your two little cronies ya' got back there... and in front of all sixty-somethin' thousand fans out there in that audience tonight, jus' lookin' for an excuse t' raise some hell... 'n I aim t' tell you exactly what I got on my mind!
The live crowd cheers loudly.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Well, let's hear it then.
[ Steve Austin ] I didn't decide t' make my in-ring return after nearly fourteen god damn years jus' so I could bounce around in a little rinky dink battle royal 'n cash a check... OH HELL NO! I decided t' come back 'n take part in the biggest damn battle royal in the business... with the highest stakes in the business... 'n I aim to walk away wit' that GOLDEN TICKET!
[ Jeff Jarrett ] I wouldn't expect nothin' less, Steve.
[ Steve Austin ] You wouldn't, would ya'? You old bastard.
Austin rubs his goatee and smiles a cynical smile.
[ Steve Austin ] You really do think you're untouchable, don't ya'? Well, let me shatter that illusion for ya' real quick, son. When I win that Golden Ticket... and I will win that Golden Ticket... I'm gonna cash that sucker in and you 'n me? We're gonna settle that shit from 2006 once 'n for all.
Jarrett smiles and shakes his head.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Seriously, Steve!? That was damn near fourteen years ago!
Austin steps up and gets right in Jarrett's face.
[ Steve Austin ] And I ain't forgot a damn bit of it... EH-EH!
We hear what sounds like metal dragging on the floor and the camera pans over to reveal Jimmy Havoc walking into the shot, dragging an axe behind him. One of his hands is heavily bandaged, still injured from breaking it at Heartbreaker. Jarrett looks from Austin to Havoc, flustered.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Oh, great.
Havoc tilts his head to the side.
[ Jimmy Havoc ] As much as I hate t' interrupt this touching reunion... well... I actually don't hate t' interrupt it 'cause who really gives a shit about Steve Austin versus Jeff Jarrett in 2020? I know I don't... had my fill of old cunts clogging up the main event scene for one lifetime.
Austin looks at Havoc and smiles. Jarrett rubs the bridge of his nose.
[ Steve Austin ] What was that?
[ Jimmy Havoc ] You 'eard me.
[ Steve Austin ] Naw, see... I didn't. I know I didn't 'cause there ain't a man alive dumb enough t' say what I think you just said t' ol' Stone Cold! What? I said I know I didn't hear ya' 'cause there ain't a man alive dumb enough t' say what I think you just said t' ol' Stone Cold! WHAT!?
Havoc just stares Austin right in the eyes. The fans buzz with anticipation. Havoc's voice is low.
[ Jimmy Havoc ] I'm gonna cut the head off a rattlesnake tonight.
Havoc raises the axe and lets Austin see his reflection in the blade.
[ Jimmy Havoc ] I'll be the one walkin' away wit' that Golden Ticket, too.
Havoc turns and looks at Jarrett.
[ Jimmy Havoc ] And then we're gonna start makin' some changes 'round here, cunts.
Havoc looks back at Austin and smirks.
[ Jimmy Havoc ] I'll be seeing you.
Havoc turns and walks off-camera, leaving Austin with the Championship Committee. Austin smiles and strokes his goatee again. He's almost chuckling aloud.
[ Steve Austin ] This shit's gonna be fun.
Austin walks off-camera in the opposite direction. Jarrett, Edge, Christian, and Trish look at one another. Jarrett just shakes his head before either of them can say anything.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] I don't even wanna hear it.
Jarrett walks off, leaving Edge and Christian with Trish. Edge huffs.
[ Edge ] Well.
[ Trish Stratus ] Shouldn't we get started? We've got sixteen huge matches. At the rate we're going, it's going to take at least eighteen days to finish all this up.
[ Christian ] Sick burn.
[ Edge ] Look at little miss Championship Committee, taking charge already. Jeez.
She glares at them, tapping her foot.
[ Trish Stratus ] Guys.
[ Christian ] Hey, I'm not arguing. Let's get this party started, shall we?
Christian throws it to the production truck and we're off to the races!
Danielson is introduced first, the fans are absolutely letting him
have it as he makes his way down the ramp slowly. “The Final
Countdown” plays as he saunders around ringside, barking at fans who
respond with middle fingers and profanities. At the peak moment of
the song, Danielson hops into the ring, pounces to the top rope, and
puts his finger in the air right as Europe blasts out “IT’S THE
FINAL COUNTDOWNNNNNN!” Tim Storm’s music hits and he comes down
looking like he means business. Before he gets to enter the ring,
Danielson dives through the middle rope, sending Storm crashing into
the guardrail! Danielson doesn’t give Storm time to recover,
continuing the attack. Danielson whips Storm into the guardrail and
then hits a running drop kick. Again, not giving Storm time to
recover, Danielson floors Storm with a snap suplex on the floor and
rolls into the ring. Danielson gets right into Aubrey’s face and
demands that she starts the ten count.
- WINNER -
Tony Schiavone ]
Pardon my French, but that was one hell of a match. Tim Storm is
possibly the roughest, toughest 50-year-old son of a bitch I’ve ever
seen. Again, apologies for the language. But my word!
from the ringside area to the back, TK Cooper and Dahlia Black are
fresh from picking Cooper’s number for the WrestleBrawl Match. And
they’re making out.
The SGW Twinstar Championship belts are resting on a podium at ringside.
As soon as the bell rings, Bea Priestley and Jamie Hayter charge at the opposition! Bea immediately nails Starlight Kid with a BEA TRIGGER, sending her tumbling through the ropes to the floor! Hayter nails Tegan Nox with a lariat and begins putting the boots to her until she rolls under the bottom rope to the floor as well! Priestley begins trading forearms with AZM and Dakota Kai nails Hayter from behind, pounding her with forearms across the back until Hayter turns around, putting her arms up to defend herself! Meanwhile, Billie Kay and Peyton Royce remain in their corner, watching the carnage unfold and cringing with every blow landed!
[ Tony Schiavone ] And we're off! These four teams have been at each other's throats for weeks in an effort to prove who truly deserves to become the first-ever SGW World Twinstar Champions!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] And the IIconics have the right idea, gentlemen! Let the other three teams sort it out amongst themselves... and then pick up the pieces!
[ Scott Steiner ] That's a bullshit strategy! Those Aussie bimbos have got augmentations and injectations in all the right places and that's somethin' Freakzilla can respect... but none o' that shit matters if all that silicone is coursin' through the veins of a couple o' broads with NO HONOR!
Suddenly, Billie and Peyton are seized by the ankles from outside by Tegan Nox and Starlight Kid! They both shriek and squeal as they dragged under the bottom rope! Nox immediately shoves Billie Kay backward into the guardrail and begins pummeling her with forearms and chops! Starlight peppers Peyton Royce with forearms until Royce sneers and fires back up, lighting Starlight up with forearms of her own before knee lifting her and giving her a snap suplex on the floor! Peyton charges over and nails Tegan Nox in the back, allowing Billie Kay to right herself. Peyton and Billie hook Tegan and give her a DOUBLE SUPLEX ON THE FLOOR!
[ Tony Schiavone ] The IIconics are pulling out all the stops after a hesitant start!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] You can't underestimate the tenacity of Billie Kay and Peyton Royce!
[ Scott Steiner ] That's how you do it, god dammit! You don't hide in the corner like a couple o' pussies! You put in the work and ya' get the god damn job done! Now I can check these broads out without bein' ashamed of the Australian wildfire goin' on in my pants!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Wait, what?
[ Scott Steiner ] What?!
Inside the ring, Dakota Kai has been beaten down in the corner and is catching her breath as Bea and Jamie double team AZM, whipping her into the ropes and going for a double clothesline. AZM ducks the clothesline, hits the ropes, and takes Jamie Hayter down with a flying headscissors! As soon as AZM returns to her feet, Bea drills her with a BEA TRIGGER... however, Bea turns right around into a PUMP KICK from Dakota Kai! The kick sends Bea staggers back into the corner and Dakota runs a lap around the ring... and NAILS BEA WITH A DRIVE-BY KICK TO THE FACE! Bea falls into a seated position and Dakota begins scraping Bea's face with her boot before hitting the ropes and delivering a devastating FACE WASH! Dakota grabs Bea by the ankle and drags her into the center of the ring before covering her! One! Two! Th-- The IIconics pull Dakota Kai out of the ring! Dakota immediately slugs Peyton Royce down with a right hand but she turns right around into SHADES OF KAY from Billie Kay! Billie laughs... but is instantly nailed with a SHOTGUN DROPKICK from Tegan Nox that sends her ragdolling backward into the ring steps!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] These competitors are bloody relentless!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What's even going on right now!?
[ Scott Steiner ] There's no god damn rules in this bullshit! Just a bunch o' fuckin' stiff shit!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Mike Chioda needs to get contro--
[ Scott Steiner ] I fuckin' love it!
Tegan Nox gets up, pumping her fists and shouting "COME ONNNN!" but AZM comes out of nowhere with a drop kick! Tegan staggers back against the apron and AZM nails her with a couple forearms before hoisting her up onto the apron. As soon as Tegan is on the apron, however, Bea Priestley FLIES OFF THE TOP AND NAILS TEGAN WITH A FLYING DOUBLE STOMP! Bea hangs onto the middle rope and rights herself as Tegan tumbles off to the floor! AZM immediately cuts Bea's legs out from under her and hooks her head, NAILING HER WITH A DRAPING DDT ONTO THE FLOOR! The fans groan in sympathy but then pop huge as AZM stands up, beating her chest with a huge smile on her face!
[ Tony Schiavone ] She is small but she is MIGHTY!
And then Jamie Hayter drills her with a baseball slide to the back that sends her tumbling forward into Billie Kay and Peyton Royce, who dump her over the rail and into the front row... before catching Starlight Kid in a running crossbody attempt! Billie and Peyton hold her up and look at each other in disbelief... before Dakota Kai comes out of nowhere and dropkicks Starlight Kid in the back, causing the IIconics to fall down with Starlight on top of them! Dakota Kai points down at Jamie Hayter climbs onto the apron and leaps off, nailing Dakota in the back with a double axe handle. Dakota goes down to her knees and Hayter grabs a handful of hair. "GET THE FUCK UP, BEA!" Hayter shouts! Bea slowly gets to her feet, favoring her neck. Hayter and Bea throw Dakota under the bottom rope and follow her in.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This is not good for Dakota Kai! Everyone else is bloody down!
Dakota rolls to the center of the ring and slowly gets up to one knee as Bea and Jamie take up positions in opposite corners. They both point at Dakota with gun-fingers. Dakota staggers up to both feet and Hayter shouts "CHAT SHIT, GET BANGED, CUNT!" Bea and Jamie charge and Dakota rolls out of the way... AND BEA NAILS JAMIE WITH THE BEA TRIGGER! Jamie goes down and rolls out of the ring! Bea looks shocked and turns right around into a SCORPION KICK TO THE FACE FROM DAKOTA KAI! Bea goes down to one knee, out of it! Tegan Nox slides into the ring and charges... SHINIEST WIZARD! Priestley goes down! As soon as Priestley is flat on her back, DAKOTA FLIES FROM THE TOP... FLYING DOUBLE STOMP! PRIESTLEY IS DEAD! Dakota rolls through and ends up on one knee on the opposite side of the ring as Tegan Nox pounces and covers Priestley, hooking both legs!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] THIS IS IT! COUNT, REF!
[ Tony Schiavone ] We're about to see the first champions crowned!
ONE! TWO! THREE! The fans pop huge!
- WINNERS & NEW CHAMPIONS -
Neither woman looks like they can believe it! Dakota and Tegan immediately tear up and hug in the middle of the ring as Mike Chioda presents them with the SGW Twinstar Championship belts! Jamie Hayter grabs Bea by the ankle and drags her out of the ring, hobbling to the back with furious looks on their faces.
[ Tony Schiavone ] Dreams do come true! And this one came true on the grandest stage of them all!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] These two women have certainly put in the work recently! Not only did they debut in the first ever Kaiju Big Battel in SGW history but they walked away victorious! Since then, they've battled adversity, having been attacked by Bea Priestley and Jamie Hayter at every opportunity... but now, here they are! Making history as the first-ever SGW World Twinstar Champions!
The fans are cheering loudly, chanting "YOU DESERVE IT!" as Tegan and Dakota hold up the championship belts. They hug in the center of the ring once more as the camera zooms in, focusing on them, before we fade out and head to the backstage area.
WrestleBrawl 3 interview set is elaborate. The WrestleBrawl logo is
stretched vertically on three large LED screens with a large monitor
set up on the left-hand side of the set. We see the Young Bucks,
Matt and Nick Jackson in their ring gear and jackets, standing
alongside Charly Caruso, who’s filling in for Cathy Kelley here
door with a large sign taped in the dead center. In large, black
letters it reads “NOT AN EXIT.” The door slowly creeps open and Paul
London enters through it with Matt Riddle right behind him. London
is wearing oversized sunglasses and a white top hat with his ring
gear on. Matt Riddle has a flat-bill cap with a track jacket zipped
up to his chin.
“LET’S GO CATHY! Clap clap clapclapclap LET’S GO CATHY!” chant
overtakes the Rogers Centre as Cathy looks ready to go in a pair of
black leggins and a SGW tank top. She hands the comically large
Lifetime title to Paul Turner as Shane Douglas, grossly out of
shape, is in his usual yellow tights with black tassels dangling
from the tops of his boots.
- WINNER & NEW CHAMPION -
] Shane Douglas has practically MURDERED Cathy Kelley right
in front of our eyes! I can’t believe it’s come to this! Someone
needs to get Cathy some help!
In the back, we see Cathy Kelley being loaded into an ambulance with Scott Steiner watching. Once he's certain that she's secure and being taken care of, he walks off-camera to return to his duties at ringside. Before the EMTs can shut the door, however, we see Starlight Kid and AZM run in from off-camera, panicked. They shout in Japanese at the EMTs.
[ AZM ] < Hey! Where are you taking her?! >
The EMT looks confused by the brightly colored words appearing out of thin air.
[ Starlight Kid ] < Is she okay? Is Cathy-san going to be okay? >
[ AZM ] < Of course she is not okay! The fat, greasy grandpa with pee-pee pants did this to her! >
[ Starlight Kid ] < Frenchfries-san, why!? >
Starlight begins openly sobbing into her hands. AZM huffs, frustrated.
[ EMT ] Look, she's going to be fine. She's just a little rattled and we're taking her in for--
WHAM! AZM and Starlight Kid are mugged from behind by Bea Priestley and Jamie Hayter! The fans erupt in boos. The EMTs quickly slam the door and the ambulance speeds off into the night. Bea and Jamie stomp away at AZM and Starlight as the live crowd boos loudly. AZM tries to sit up and fight back but Priestley boots her right in the face! Hayter snatches Starlight up by her mask and gets right in her face.
[ Jamie Hayter ] You thought we were finished, cunts!?
She slaps Starlight hard across the face. Starlight shrieks in surprise.
[ Jamie Hayter ] We're not finished until we say we're finished!
She drops Starlight, allowing her to fall backward onto the pavement. Hayter and Priestley walk away, leaving Starlight and AZM down. The fans boo as we zoom out, revealing that Billie Kay and Peyton Royce were watching from the distance. Billie Kay stomps her foot on the ground, frustrated.
[ Billie Kay ] Oh come awwwwwn! I wanted t' beat down the little ones 'n send a bloody message!
Peyton looks no less frustrated.
[ Peyton Royce ] Anotha' time, Billie... Fallout is in two weeks... let's find ourselves a bigga' target, shall we? The Twinstar titles, nice as they are... are small potatoes. What say we find ourselves a bigga' target?
Billie looks at Peyton and raises an eyebrow.
[ Billie Kay ] I do like the sound of that.
As road agents approach to check on AZM and Starlight Kid, Billie and Peyton walk away, hand in hand as we fade to black.
We fade up backstage where we see Charly Caruso standing in front of the SGW interview backdrop. Standing next to her, we see Dakota Kai and Tegan Nox with the SGW World Twinstar Championships over their shoulders. The fans cheer loudly. Tegan and Dakota appear overjoyed to be here, having made history earlier in the night.
[ Charly Caruso ] Dakota Kai... Tegan Nox! Congratulations on the huge win earlier tonight, becoming the first Twinstar champions in SGW history! What must be going through your minds right now? Your first WrestleBrawl and you're walking out with gold!
Nox and Kai look at each other, smiling. Nox looks down at her championship belt.
[ Tegan Nox ] This feeling... Charly... it's out o' this world. I don't even know how t' put it into words.
[ Dakota Kai ] This is what we've had our sights set on since we came t' Solid Gold Wrestlin'... we wanted t' be pioneers of the women's tag team scene in this company 'n now here we are... the first champions 'n nobody can take that away from us!
We hear laughter from off-camera. Dakota and Tegan both look surprised. From off-camera, El Hijo del Ice Cream and Ice Cream, Jr. appear from either side with the SGW World Tag Team Championship belts around their waists. The fans boo loudly. Los Ice Creams lurk around Team Kick creepily. Nox and Kai visibly cringe as the Ice Creams come close to touching them. Charly looks confused.
[ Charly Caruso ] Um, Los Ice Creams? What are you doing here?
Before either of them can answer, Ted Dibiase walks into the shot with a sinister smirk on his face. The fans boo loudly. Dibiase snatches the microphone out of Charly Caruso's hand. He raises it and begins to speak.
[ Ted Dibiase ] What are the SGW World Tag Team Champions doing here? They're doing exactly what that gold and my money allow them to do! And do you know what that is, Charly Caruso!? ANYTHING THEY WANT! HAHAHAHAHA!
Dibiase looks at Dakota Kai and Tegan Nox, his eyes falling upon their championship belts.
[ Ted Dibiase ] Tonight, even more history will be made... when my Ice Creams, violent and delicious as they are, make short work of Team Tremendous once and for all! But that's not why I'm standing here right now... you see, I have a fever, ladies... and it's not COVID-19! NO! It's a very particular kind of fever... and the only cure... IS MORE TAG TEAM GOLD!
Nox and Kai look at each other and then back at Dibiase. Before they can say anything, Shayna Baszler, Becky Lynch, and Hana Kimura walk into the shot. Nox and Kai look the three ladies up and down.
[ Dakota Kai ] Bring it on.
[ Tegan Nox ] Any time... anywhere!
Dibiase chuckles, his voice is low and gravelly.
[ Ted Dibiase ] Don't tease me, ladies. You'll get what's coming to you sooner than later... and then? I'll get what's coming to me! Your gold! Everyone else's gold! All of it! All mine! When you're as rich as me, you're too big to fail! I made tag champions out of Ice Cream for god's sake! HAHAHAHAHA!
Becky steps up, tilting her nose up in the air, staring down at Nox and Kai.
[ Becky Lynch ] Are yun's gonna be waggin' those jaws whilst I'm tearin' 'em off, eh?
[ Tegan Nox ] Uh, English?
Baszler steps up next, holding a towel around her neck.
[ Shayna Baszler ] She's got marbles in her mouth but the coppertop curse is right... you two chicks have been runnin' your mouths since ya' got here 'n you've done nothin' to earn that right. So, me 'n her... we're gonna choke you out and snap your arms off... and then we're gonna put those titles around the waists of a couple legitimate athletes that these fans can respect...
Dakota and Tegan look at one another and then back at Shayna.
[ Dakota Kai ] ...who?
[ Shayna Baszler ] Us, you idiot!
[ Becky Lynch ] Oh yah, yer real funny, arn'cha!? Ye' won' be s' funny when I slap dat foony lookin' 'ead offa' yer shoulders, willya?!
Baszler puts her hand up, stopping Lynch from advancing on them.
[ Shayna Baszler ] Nah, not tonight... they ain't worth it. These two might not respect us, Bex... but when we're done with 'em... they'll damn sure fear us. I can promise you that.
You can cut the tension with a knife until Hana Kimura pushes past Dibiase and begins speaking in Japanese. The words scroll across the screen in large green and pink text. She's sounds very unhappy.
[ Hana Kimura ] < This is boring! No one cares about ugly Shayna and stupid Becky! >
Dibiase turns and glares at her, as though he understands every word... or he just read the words as they scrolled across the bottom of the screen. He looks furious.
[ Ted Dibiase ] That's enough! I told you, this is the goal! Money and championships!
[ Hana Kimura ] < Money and championship! Money and championship! I don't care! I have a match tonight! These two losers do not have a match tonight! You should be paying attention to me! >
Hana gets right in Dibiase's face, speaking English now so everyone can hear.
[ Hana Kimura ] I... do... not... care... about... money.
The fans cheer loudly as this act of defiance. Becky and Shayna glare at Hana. Dakota and Tegan stand there in silence, their mouths in perfect "o"s, wondering where this is going next.
[ Hana Kimura ] Barb-uh-ree... Buh-rank... die.
Hana's eyes narrow with intensity.
[ Hana Kimura ] ...tonight.
Dibiase looks like he's mad enough that he could punch her. She salutes him.
[ Hana Kimura ] Yes... sir!
Hana stomps off-camera as the fans cheer. Tegan and Dakota walk away as well, leaving Charly Caruso standing alongside Dibiase and his stable of Ice Creams and legitimate athletes. Dibiase shakes his head, sweat dripping off his nose.
[ Ted Dibiase ] Ladies... we might have ourselves a bit of a problem to take care of tonight.
Shayna and Becky look at each other and smile.
bell can even ring and certainly before the ringside attendants and
fire containment team can ignite the equipment surrounding the ring
for the Ring of Fire to activate, Jimmy Jacobs and Elias are in
center ring, one hand on the other’s neck and the second throwing
insanely fast punches at breakneck speed.
Tony Schiavone ]
God in heaven they could have both been burnt just then! Elias only
missed the flames by a foot or so!
- WINNER -
avoids Elias, turning to see the insanity behind him. His flaming
guitar, only narrowly avoiding Lacey, falls to the mat. Already
crying, Lacey is forced to watch in horror as Jimmy falls back-first
into the equipment around the ring, his back and left shoulder and
bicep being burned for about two seconds in the blazing flames
before attendants swarm him, covering his entire body with the
Origin’s locker room, we see Adam Cole with his head in his hands,
deep in thought, getting in the zone for his match later tonight.
The SGW Championship rests on a chair next to him and shines
brightly from the glare of the lights above.
gets their own entrance, coming down team-by-team until the ring is
filled with twenty superstars of past and present. The fans are
anxiously anticipating this one as there’s so many routes this one
could go in terms of who leaves the winner. The bell sounds and
Christian steps to the center of the ring, preventing everyone from
moving. He takes a microphone and holds everything up.
Well Edge, one more thing and our jobs here are done.. Bring me..
The Dudley Boyz!
] All of that plannin’.. Namin’ the match.. All of it..
“SID!” chant begins as the former Tag Champion looks invigorated. As
he turns around, he’s greeted by a running knee strike from Matt
Riddle, sending him over the top rope! As Buff Bagwell dives off the
top rope on the other side of the ring, he’s hit with a double super
kick from the Young Bucks! Danhausen finds himself brawling back and
forth with Chuck Taylor as Vincent and Paul London try their best to
to dump the Blue Meanie, but their efforts proves unsuccessful.
ELIMINATED: Tha Tru Warriorz
through, things get interesting when Al Snow and Matt Riddle find
themselves trading blows on the apron, each man narrowly escaping
getting knocked off by the other. SUPER KICKS! Snow and Riddle are
staggering. SUPER KICKS! SUPER KICKS! Danhausen springs off the
ropes and dives at them, but they drop to their knees as he makes it
to the ropes and flies over the top! Danhausen is gone! Trent? grabs
Nick Jackson in a Half-Nelson as Chuck comes around Soul
Food/Half-n-Half! Matt leaves Snow and Riddle to focus on saving
inside, Paul London is the odd man out as we’re down to our final
four teams, but he’s the only one without a partner. So Paul London
does what it takes to survive. He slides out of the ring and crawls
underneath without anyone noticing… but immediately springs back out
with a horrified look on his face. He crawls back into the ring and
curls up in the corner like he’s seen a ghost.
ELIMINATED: The JOB Squad
Chuck and Trent? extend their arms and march towards one another for a hug, because you GOT to give the people what they want! Upon hugging, the camera dramatically zooms out, giving us the Okada camera shot. Their hug is short lived as the Bucks wreck each member with a super kick. Matt grabs Chuck and hits a steamroller as Nick climbs up top - 450! Matt quickly follows with a moonsault! More Bang for Your Buck! SHOOTING STAR FROM PAUL LONDON OUT OF NOWHERE FROM THE OTHER TURNBUCKLE! You can audibly hear Chuck screaming in agony on the mat, the words “FUCK ME” echoing. Trent? is back up and clotheslines Nick Jackson over the top rope! Paul London hits a dropkick on Matt and lands on top of Chuck in one fluid motion! Trent? then clotheslines Matt over the top!
ELIMINATED: The Young Bucks
pumps his fists and seeks a high five from Trent? for their job well
done. With Chuck slow to his feet, Trent? looks at London
confusingly, mouthing “whose side are you on?” Superkick from Trent?
and a low blow from Chuck! Chuck clutches his ribs and points to
London, “I punched you in your dick because there’s no more Bucks
left to do it to!” Trent? picks London up and tosses him over the
top, immediately hugging Chuck.. London skins the cat and enters the
ring! He bounces off the ropes and hits a flying double clothesline!
The Best Friends are back up and he does it again! Standing Shooting
Star to Trent?!
- WINNERS & #1 CONTENDERS -
Orange Cassidy rolls into the ring and gives a half-hearted thumbs up as Chuck also rejoins the group. Chuck and Trent? hug Orange Cassidy as the fans roar. We have new number one contenders to the SGW World Tag Team Championship!
The scene in
the trainers’ room, temporarily made over into an emergency medical
facility, is dire.
The match is pandemonium before it even reaches the ring! During Hana Kimura's entrance, Barbie Blank attacked her from behind with a kendo stick while wearing a full hazmat suit! The fans erupted in boos as Hana went down to all fours on the stage! Barbie Blank continued to lay into Hana with the kendo stick, lashing her across the back repeatedly as Mike Chioda left the ring and charged up the ramp to begin officiating the match!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What a classless fiend, this Barbie Blank!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This has been quite the puzzling rivalry, Tony. These women debuted on the same night against one another at Total Destruction! We witnessed Barbie Blank barely eek out the victory by count out... which seemed to send Hana Kimura into a fit of rage! The fans didn't quite understand, I don't think... the cultural differences, the level of humiliation that Hana Kimura felt because of that loss... it left fans confused and caused them to embrace Barbie Blank until her vile, true colors were exposed soon after!
[ Tony Schiavone ] To say the waters are muddy in regards to this rivalry would be an understatement, Nigel. What began as a battle for honor has turned into... well, Hana Kimura defending herself from... possibly the most ignorant woman who has ever walked into Solid Gold Wrestling! I mean, look at how she's dressed! Disgusting and disrespectful!
Hana rolls over onto her back and begins kicking at Barbie's mid-section, fending off further attacks from the kendo stick. She finally lands a solid blow into Barbie's stomach, causing her to back up, clutching her stomach in pain. Hana returns to her feet, red welts across her shoulders and back. Barbie tries to swing the kendo stick again but Hana catches it under her arm and punches Barbie right in the face! Barbie goes down on the stage and Hana grabs two handfuls of the hazmat suit and begins ripping it off of Barbie, shredding it until it's in tatters!
[ Scott Steiner ] HELL YEAH, TAKE IT OFF!
Underneath the hazmat suit, Barbie is literally in lingerie! She's lying on the stage, scrambling away from Hana Kimura with genuine fear in her eyes, wearing nothing but her underwear and a hazmat mask! Hana Kimura is raging out as the fans go wild!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Why wouldn't she wear gear under the hazmat suit!?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] You... you haven't been paying attention to Barbie Blank's behavior, have you?
Hana Kimura picks up the kendo stick and nails Barbie across the stomach with it and she immediately welts up with a bruise forming. Barbie cries out in pain as the fans chant "WHOOP THAT TRICK" over and over. Barbie tries to crawl away on all fours and Hana kicks her in the ass, sending her sprawling forward on the ramp. Barbie begins rolling down the ramp comically in her bra, panties, and hazmat mask. Hana holds up the kendo stick and the fans cheer as she follows Barbie down to ringside. Barbie stops rolling at the apron and Hana kicks her in the side, causing her to roll over onto her stomach. Hana places the kendo stick beneath Barbie's chin and begins violently choking her! Barbie grasps at her throat and her eyes bug out as Hana continues pulling back, planting her knee in Barbie's back for extra torque.
[ Tony Schiavone ] By God, she's gonna kill her!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Barbie Blank has been the source of so much controversy since she came to Solid Gold Wrestling. She's offended all manner of races, minorities, body types, sexual orientations... you name it, she's spit on it! She's finally getting her comeuppance and the fans are bloody here for it, living vicariously through Hana Kimura!
Hana releases the choke and rips the hazmat mask off Barbie. She grabs a handful of her hair and flips her over, spitting in her face before pulling her up to her feet and slinging her under the bottom rope. Barbie rolls to the center of the ring and Hana throws the apron up, digging around for weapons. She finds a long chain and wads it up before tossing it under the bottom rope. She looks around some more and finds a steel chair, sliding it into the ring as well. The fans are buzzing with anticipation, ready to see where all this goes... and then Hana reaches under the ring and finds... A SAI!? Hana smiles and climbs onto the apron, gripping the sai tightly in her hand. She steps through the ropes and advances on Barbie, who is still lying face down and cradling her head, trying to protect herself from further punishment. Hana plants her knee in Barbie's back once again and yanks her head up by her hair... before digging the point of the sai into Barbie's hairline, drawing blood!
[ Scott Steiner ] God damn! So this is that kinda' match, huh!? Fuck! You two are supposed to warn me when this shit's about to go down!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] How... how are we supposed t' know the extent these women will go t' hurt one another?!
Hana discards the sai, tossing it to the side and pulls back on Barbie's hair, really wrenching it as blood pours down her face! The fans are going nuts as Hana takes out weeks of frustration on Blank. Finally, Hana shoves Barbie's face down and rubs her face into the mat, leaving bloody streaks on the canvas. Hana stands and looms over Barbie, breathing heavily. The fans begin chanting "PLEASE DON'T STOP" over and over. Hana stomps across the ring before picking up the chain. Meanwhile, Mike Chioda is beginning the ten count... ONE! TWO! Barbie Blank isn't moving at all. THREE! FOUR! She's still face down on the mat... FIVE! SIX! Hana returns to Barbie's body and breaks the count by wrapping the chain around Barbie's neck, making sure it's good and tight. Hana begins dragging Barbie across the ring, toward the ropes.
[ Tony Schiavone ] What's she doing, Nigel!?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I'm scared t' even venture a guess, Tony!
Barbie is being dragged on all fours for a moment before she finally grabs the chain with both hands and tries to pull back. Hana won't be denied and Barbie yanks the chain, pulling Hana forward into a kick to the stomach from Barbie's bare foot! Hana doubles over and Barbie returns to her feet, blood pouring down her face. She takes two handfuls of the chain and nails Hana across the back with a double axe handle! Hana goes down to one knee and Barbie smiles, raising the wad of chains again as the fans begin chanting "YOU CAN'T WRESTLE" at her! Barbie looks around, appearing genuinely hurt for a fleeting moment... allowing Hana to yank the chain, causing Barbie to stagger awkwardly toward the ropes... where Hana dumps her over the top rope... HANGING HER IN THE PROCESS!
[ Tony Schiavone ] OH MY GOODNESS! NO!
Hana plants her foot on the middle rope and pulls back on the chain, choking Barbie Blank to death as Mike Chioda looks on in horror! The bloodthirsty fans are loving it, continuing to chant "YOU CAN'T WRESTLE" at the struggling competitor! Her feet are barely able to touch the floor but Hana continues to wrench back on the chain, willing to end this woman once and for all who has harassed her for over a month now!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Mike Chioda should put a stop to this! End the match!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] The match can't end until the ten count has been registered!
The fans are cheering loudly as Hana continues to choke out Barbie with the chain. Finally, Hana lets go and Barbie falls limp to the floor. Hana climbs out of the ring and heaves Barbie up onto the apron, shoving her inside the ring. Hana climbs onto the apron and steps through the ropes. Hana lets Mike Chioda count up to seven before Barbie begins to stir. Hana isn't taking any chances! She snatches Barbie up off the mat... TIGER LILY! RIGHT ON HER NECK! Hana rolls back to her feet and stands over Barbie's body, swaying her hips and making sexy poses! The fans count along as Mike Chioda counts to ten, signaling the end of the match!
- WINNER -
Hana smiles, satisfied with the damage she's done. The fans are cheering but those cheers suddenly turn to boos! Hana looks confused for a moment but before she can figure out what's going on, she's blasted from behind with a steel chair... from Becky Lynch! The boos become deafening as Becky stands over Hana with the chair, a smug look on her face. Shayna Baszler slides into the ring, a sinister smirk on her face. Hana Kimura struggles back up to one knee, looking from Shayna to Becky, a confused look on her face.
[ Tony Schiavone ] What's going on here!? I thought... I thought those were her partners!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I do believe there was some sort of alliance between these three ladies, bankrolled by the devious Ted Dibiase... but it would appear that alliance has expired!
[ Scott Steiner ] Never trust a man who manages two jabronis dressed up like ice cream cones! Say what you will about anything else that happens on this fucked up show but those ice cream punks are straight-up outlaw bullshit! THEY'RE TRASH!
As Hana looks up at Becky, favoring her back, Becky pulls back... AND NAILS HANA RIGHT IN THE HEAD WITH THE CHAIR! Hana goes down, unconscious in the center of the ring! The boos are causing the building to shake and they become impossibly louder once Ted Dibiase walks out onto the stage with a disappointed look on his face. He slowly makes his way down to the ring with a microphone in his hand as EMTs rush toward the ring, running past him. He walks up the steps and then steps through the ropes. The EMTs quickly get the scantily clad, horribly wounded Barbie Blank out of the ring and up the ramp, out of sight. Becky Lynch and Shayna Baszler look down at Hana Kimura as Dibiase approaches.
[ Tony Schiavone ] This is certainly ominous... what are we witnessing right now?!
Dibiase looks down at Hana and raises the microphone.
[ Ted Dibiase ] Kid, I really hoped it wouldn't come to this... but when I hired you to be a part of this organization... my organization... I expected you to fall in line and do whatever it takes to bring me money... and gold!
The fans boo loudly, already knowing where this is going.
[ Ted Dibiase ] But instead, you've brought me nothing but disappointment and frustration! You're obsessed with teaching this... talentless nitwit a lesson! And why!? Because she was mean to you!? Because you were disrespected?! Sure, you won the match but what do I get out of it?! Nothing! That's what! Let me make something perfectly clear, Hana Kimura!
Shayna Baszler pulls Kimura up into a seated position, wrapping her arm around Hana's throat to keep her in place. Hana's eyelids flutter, still quite out of it. Dibiase leans down, getting in Hana's face.
[ Ted Dibiase ] I don't care about your reputation and I damn sure don't care about your feelings! You are nothing but an investment... and you've yielded me... NO RESULTS! Unacceptable! Unacceptable, I say! You've left me no choice... effective immediately, your contract?!
Spittle flies from his mouth as he shouts.
[ Ted Dibiase ] IT'S TERMINATED! HA HA HA HAAAAA!
Dibiase drops the microphone and gestures toward Shayna and Becky, ordering them to "finish her off!" The fans boo loudly as Shayna and Becky prepare to go back to work, ending this experiment with Hana Kimura once and for all!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What a scumbag! What an evil... evil person, that Ted Dibiase!
Before Shayna and Becky can do anymore damage, however, Dakota Kai and Tegan Nox emerge from the back and sprint down the ramp! They both slide under the bottom rope! Dakota Kai immediately boots Shayna Baszler right in the face, knocking her flat on her back and sending her rolling out of the ring! Ted Dibiase escapes through the ropes and begins hightailing it up the ramp! Becky Lynch and Tegan Nox trade punches before Dakota Kai joins in! They whip Becky into the ropes and nail her with a double clothesline! Becky rolls out of the ring, and joins Shayna and Dibiase as they leave up the ramp, pissed!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Here's Team Kick! That's what you get, Dibiase! He is certainly reaping what he's sewn here tonight!
[ Scott Steiner ] Somebody get Dibiase outta' here! He's turnin' this event into a god damn clown show!
[ Tony Schiavone ] It looks like Hana Kimura might have finally found some friends she can rely on!
Kimura is stirring but unable to stand on her own. Tegan and Dakota help her to her feet and assist her toward the ropes. The fans give Kimura a standing ovation as she's helped out of the ring and up the ramp. She's visibly in pain, sobbing with an... angry look on her face as they reach the entrance way. Hana turns to look out at the grateful fans and huffs. With a parting shot of Team Kick standing on either side of the victorious Kimura, we fade out.
the cameras catch up with Tim Storm, who is very carefully walking,
grimacing in pain with every step he takes. He’s battered and in a
rough shape after his match earlier tonight, but has recovered
enough for a quick shower and a change in clothes. Storm is dragging
his rolling suitcase behind him, heading towards the arena’s exit.
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees someone that stops him dead in
is tense, yet excited for the lunacy to come as the bell rings,
starting the ladder match for custody of Jason Jordan. The ‘child’
in question is seated at ringside, in a simple folding chair and
looking absolutely miserable that all of the madness of the year has
led to this.
WINNER & UNDISPUTED FATHER OF JASON JORDAN -
a scene of victory as Kurt Angle slowly descends the ladder and
leaps into the air happily, falling to his knees and clutching the
briefcase tightly – before replacing it with his son, Jason!
Kross exits an office with his WrestleBrawl number in hand. Dr.
Stevie is doing his best to motivate his client.
unassuming Paul Turner serves as a temporary barrier between the two
sides of a long-standing issue in Solid Gold Wrestling – but despite
his calm presence, the squealing tones of Gregory Helms permeate the
air and poison the moment.
- WINNER & NEW CHAMPION -
calls for the bell and a ringside attendant delivers the Limitless
Championship to him, which he proudly bestows to Ruby Riott.
We fade up backstage on a shot of Rhea Ripley walking down a corridor toward the dressing room area. The fans cheer loudly upon seeing Ripley appear. She's in torn up black jeans and a leather jacket. In the distance, we can hear punk rock music blaring behind a closed door. As she approaches, we see two men standing on either side of the dressing room door... the men known as Reno SCUM, Adam Thornstowe and Luster the Legend. They eye Ripley as she draws closer. She gives them a quick nod.
[ Rhea Ripley ] Oi, CVE in there?
Luster folds his arms across his chest, trying to look intimidating.
[ Luster the Legend ] Who's askin'?
Rhea looks indignant.
[ Rhea Ripley ] Fuck off, mate. Is CVE in there or what?
[ Adam Thornstowe ] She's in there, alright.
[ Rhea Ripley ] Right.
She approaches the door and Reno SCUM draw their shoulders together, blocking the door.
[ Rhea Ripley ] What's all this, then?
[ Luster the Legend ] Look, she ain't been right since she... ya' know... dropped the strap.
[ Adam Thornstowe ] She's in there, alright... but she's gettin' ready for war.
[ Luster the Legend ] She ain't to be disturbed, is what we're sayin'.
Ripley shakes her head, looking annoyed.
[ Luster the Legend ] We'll let 'er know ya' stopped by.
[ Adam Thornstowe ] No disrespect.
Ripley waves them off, obviously offended.
[ Rhea Ripley ] Yeah, whateva'.
Ripley walks off, leaving SCUM to themselves. They look at each other.
[ Adam Thornstowe ] You think she's pissed?
[ Luster the Legend ] Women.
[ Adam Thornstowe ] Can't live with 'em... can't kill 'em.
Official Aubrey Edwards is playing point in the contest for the
Solid Gold Wrestling World Tag Team Championships – a matchup
between two Cinderella teams, the challengers Team Tremendous and
the champions Los Ice Creams.
- WINNERS & NEW CHAMPIONS -
PI Theme hits and the Rogers Centre is electric in celebration –
Team Tremendous have done it!
Tremendous’ celebration begins, we go to the announce booth, being
greeted by Tony, Nigel, and Scott.
Rhodes enters the ring first wearing red leather pants tucked into
matching cowboy boots and a sleeveless black shirt. His hands and
wrists are taped for battle. He’s also gone without his usual face
paint tonight. He enters the ring to a chorus of boos and
reluctantly puts his right hand inside the opening on one end of the
thick bull rope. Dustin has a calm demeanor, looking completely in
the zone for the war that's about to momentarily break out. The fans
are booing Dustin heavily, something the elder Rhodes is not
- WINNER -
removes the rope and raises Cody’s hand in the air but Cody yanks it
down and exits the ring. He grabs Brandi by the hand and marches up
the ramp. Cody never wanted any of this upon entering SGW, and now
that it's over, he can turn his attentions back to the original
goal. For now, spending one more second focusing on what he did to
his own brother is something he can't stomach.
THE MONSTER ABYSS IS COMING
We fade up backstage with a shot of Ruby Riott, still in her gear. She's just standing there, looking down at the SGW Limitless Championship with tears in her eyes. She's approached by Charly Caruso, who is smiling proudly. Ruby shows no sign of acknowledging Charly's presence.
[ Charly Caruso ] Ruby Riott... you did it.
Ruby wipes a tear from her cheek but doesn't look up at Charly.
[ Charly Caruso ] You just became the first woman to hold the SGW Limitless Championship after a grueling match with Sami Zayn... you must be overcome with emotion right now... what's going through your head? You just made history.
Ruby looks down at the championship for another long moment before slowly turning her head to look at Charly. A proud smile begins to form on Ruby's face. She brings the championship in close to her chest and walks off-camera without a word, leaving Charly alone. The live crowd is cheering loudly as we zoom in on Charly's smiling, confused face.
x D x E x M x O x N x B x U x N x N x Y x
x My Name is Legion x For We Are Many x
As the match begins, there's an ominous sense of dread in the building. The stage and ramp are lined with members of The Cube Army and cloaked Scientologists. Tom Cruise is shirtless, wearing wrestling boots, and trunks with "Risky Business" across the ass and his own face on his crotch. Candy Floss shuffles her feet nervously, looking around with genuine fear in her eyes. Kris Statlander is all business... her eyes are locked on John Travolta, who is also shirtless and wearing wrestling trunks... with the Church of Scientology logo across the ass. Travolta is wrestling barefoot with tape around his ankles. Across his stomach, we see tattooed: "Only Xenu May Audit Me." He's dripping with baby oil. The fans shift uncomfortably upon laying their eyes on him. Tucor lurks in the corner, his horrifyingly human eyes staring a hole through his opponents on the other side of the ring. The Rock paces back and forth, shaking his head and wagging his tongue around. He carries a bottle of his tequila in his hand, refusing to put it down no matter how much Rick Knox tells him to. Nurse Ratchet and the Big Kaijus stand among the Cube Army soldiers on the stage, they watch intently.
Most egregious of all, though... Dr. Cube has joined the commentary team for this match.
[ Dr. Cube ] Can you feeEeeeeEeel it, fellow men? This... this is the END!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Dr. Cube, I would like to say it's an honor t' have you here right now but what is the horrifying stench you've brought along with you, I must ask!
[ Dr. Cube ] That is the smell of centuries of work finally paying off! It is the smell of victory! Tonight is the night that I am finally justified in time traveling all those years ago and creating my most successful of monstrosities... the Church of Scientology!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Wait, what?
[ Dr. Cube ] With careful manipulation of L. Ron Hubbard decades ago, I put this plan into motion that would allow me to control the two-time SGW World Heavyweight Champion, The Rock! As well as claim the minds of men like John Travolta and Tom Cruise... though Tom Cruise proved to be too far a simpleton to maintain control of for long... and now he is the bane of my existence along with Kris Statlander and this insufferable Candy Floss!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I fancy myself an intelligent man, Dr. Cube, but I'm having a hard time figuring out exactly what your plan is... are we t' believe that you time traveled and set all of this in motion as some sort of complicated revenge plot against Kris Statlander and Candy Floss?
There's a moment of silence as we hear Dr. Cube breathing heavily.
[ Dr. Cube ] Do not insult me by trying to understand my plans, you fool. They are beyond your comprehension.
[ Scott Steiner ] Seriously, though, what the fuck's that smell!?
We get a close-up shot of Tom Cruise huddled with Statlander and Floss.
[ Candy Floss ] What's the plan? What are we doing? Seriously, what are we doing!?
Tom Cruise looks over at the opposite corner and removes his aviators. Everything seems to slow down at once. His hair moves with a breeze that comes from nowhere. He smiles and his teeth twinkle in the light. Candy looks at him, genuinely concerned.
[ Tom Cruise ] Alien girl, John Travolta is all yours.
Statlander nods, confident.
[ Tom Cruise ] Cotton candy girl, you look like you can handle The Rock. So take care of him, will ya'?
[ Candy Floss ] What.
[ Tom Cruise ] As for me... I'm takin' down that gnarly bird monster.
Cruise turns and looks at Rick Knox, pointing at him dramatically.
[ Tom Cruise ] Hey, you... in the stripes.
Knox looks down at his shirt and then back up at Cruise.
[ Tom Cruise ] Ring the damn bell.
Knox looks confused... and sounds annoyed.
[ Rick Knox ] Rung it four minutes ago. We're waitin' on you, fucko.
[ Tom Cruise ] Right on.
Tom Cruise leads the charge, running full speed across the ring at Tucor only to get clotheslined so hard that he turns inside out and lands on his head and neck! Tucor screech-roars and looms over Tom Cruise for a moment before delivering a BIG SPLASH! The fans don't know what to think as Tucor demolishes the former SGW World Heavyweight Champion!
[ Dr. Cube ] Yes! Annihilate! Eradicate! Terminate him! My most timeliest of creatures!
Candy Floss chews her bottom lip but goes for it anyway, charging into the warzone, right toward The Rock! She nails The Rock with a big forearm and he completely no-sells it! The Rock looks down at his bottle of tequila and then back up at Candy Floss, confused.
[ The Rock ] AW NO! AW HELL NAW! THAT AIN'T HOW THIS IS GOIN' DOWN, MAMA! WHOA! THE ROCK SAYS IT'S TIME FOR CANDY FLOSS T' TASTE THE ROCK'S SECRET RECIPE! TIME FOR CANDAAAAAY T' BOW DOWN AT THE ALTAR OF XENUUUUUU! AND THEN! AND THEN, DO YA' KNOW WHAT HAPPENS, CANDY FLOSS!? DO YA' KNOW WHAT HAPPENS, THEN!? HUH!? AH?! HAHA! BABY, I'M THE ROCK!
Candy wrings her hands together, genuinely unsure what to do!
[ Candy Floss ] Everything ya' bloody sayin' literally makes no sense!
[ The Rock ] The Rock has done everything there is t' do in Solid Gold Wrestlin', baby! There ain't nothin' left! As a matter of fact, the only thing The Rock hasn't done is make some cotton candy babies with the candy ass Candy Floss from the Candy Crush Kingdom, yeah! How's that sound, mama!? We'll drink The Rock's tequila, have cotton candy babies with sweet tribal tattoos, and move into The Big Rock Candy Mountain! YEAH!
Candy looks mortified.
[ Candy Floss ] Absolutely NOT!
And then she tees off and kicks The Rock right in the balls! The Rock drops his tequila bottle and Candy picks it up. She prepares to smash it across his face but John Travolta grabs her wrist! The fans erupt in boos as Travolta wags his finger in her face with a sinister grin! But before Travolta can stop her, Kris Statlander comes out of nowhere with a SHOTGUN DROPKICK that sends John Travolta staggering backward into Tucor! Tucor tumbles through the ropes and to the floor!
[ Dr. Cube ] Tucor, you fool!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Ladies and gentlemen, this could be the... the worst match in the history of our sport!
[ Scott Steiner ] Fuckin' outlaw bullshit!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Gentlemen, I'm off t' the loo.
We hear Nigel's headset placed on the table as he gets up and leaves. Without warning, Candy Floss EXPLODES the brainwash tequila across the Rock's head! The Rock falls through the ropes to the floor, leaving Statlander and Floss in the ring alone with John Travolta! Travolta gets up, looking pissed! He charges at them... and slips in a puddle of his own baby oil! He lands flat on his back and Candy Floss drills him with a STANDING DOUBLE STOMP TO THE CHEST! Travolta rolls over on his side and begins military crawling toward the ropes. He looks at the announce table, locking eyes with Dr. Cube!
[ John Travolta ] Dr. Cube... Cube! I need more power, baby...
We hear Dr. Cube stand up behind the table. We get a shot of him standing between the seated Schiavone and Steiner, who look like they would rather be anywhere but here. Cube shakes his head in disgust.
[ Dr. Cube ] Pathetic.
Cube drops his headset and walks away from the announce table! He waves Travolta off and begins walking up the ramp, away from the ring! Travolta begins openly sobbing, realizing he's truly been defeated.
[ Dr. Cube ] Most undesirable! Millennia of planning down the tubes!
Travolta uses the ropes to pull himself up to his bare feet. He slowly turns around... and immediately gets scooped up by Tom Cruise... and planted with CRUISE CONTROL!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That's the move he won the SGW World Heavyweight Championship with!
[ Scott Steiner ] Shut the fuck up.
The impact sends John Travolta right back to his feet and Kris Statlander picks him up with superhuman strength... and drills him with the BIG BANG! The fans erupt in cheers as Statlander remains on top of him with both legs hooked! Rick Knox drops down! ONE! TWO! THREE!
- WINNERS & HOLDERS OF REAL ULTIMATE POWER -
The fans pop huge! Tom Cruise points toward the ramp, at the departing Dr. Cube!
[ Tom Cruise ] Don't let him get away!
Tom Cruise leaps out of the ring and immediately clotheslines a Scientologist on the way down! Cube soldiers and other Scientologists try to stop him but Cruise begins leveling them with a Sting-like flurry of punches, chops, and kicks! Kris Statlander executes a plancha out of the ring, wiping out at least a dozen Cube soldiers! Statlander and Cruise fight like warriors as they cut a swath through the mob of minions but the stage opens up, smoke billowing out from beneath the steel grating! A light show emanates from the depths of the stage and a pod rises from beneath! Dr. Cube approaches the pod and there's a hiss as it opens up. Dr. Cube steps inside, followed by Nurse Ratchet and the Big Kaijus!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What... is... happening!?
Dr. Cube is lowered into the stage along with Ratchet and the Kaijus as the fans boo!
[ Scott Steiner ] That box head fuck has escaped again!
The soldiers and Scientologists quickly retreat, leaving only Tom Cruise and Kris Statlander on the ramp, looking on in awe as Dr. Cube escapes in his pod. The stage remains open with smoke pouring out, making it difficult to breathe for fans sitting nearest the opening. The boos suddenly get even louder for some reason. Cruise and Statlander turn and see that John Travolta has returned to his feet and is holding Candy Floss with what must be assumed to be a laser gun to her head! He has a microphone in his hand.
[ John Travolta ] Uh-uh! That's not how this is goin' down, baby! Not by a god damn long shot!
The fans boo loudly. Tom Cruise begins to take a step forward.
[ John Travolta ] No way, Tom Cruise! Stop right where the fuck you are! See, I got this groovy laser gun, baby! Powered by the magic of Scientology and the real REAL ultimate power! You take another step and this cotton candy cunt becomes a stain! A grease stain, if you will!
There's a rumble as Tucor returns to his feet and climbs inside the ring. Tucor screech-growls and approaches Travolta. Travolta smiles and gestures for Tucor to come closer.
[ John Travolta ] Yeah, that's right, Tucor! Get over here! Stand united with the Supreme Being of Scientology! Me! Together, no one can stop us! Together, we can destroy all three of these mother fuckers and take over this--
Tucor nails John Travolta from behind with a giant, furry forearm! Travolta staggers forward and Candy Floss falls to the side! Travolta turns around with a genuine look of betrayal on his face... and Candy Floss steps forward and kicks him right in the nuts! Travolta falls through the ropes to the floor! Tucor follows him out! The fans begin chanting "FUCK HIM UP, TUCOR, FUCK HIM UP! <clap clap>" Travolta tries to beg Tucor off but Tucor won't be denied! Tucor lifts John Travolta up in a gorilla press and walks him to the gaping hole in the stage where Dr. Cube escaped! The fans are roaring as Tucor stands at the edge... AND THROWS JOHN TRAVOLTA INTO THE VOID!
Tucor slowly turns around and the stage begins to close up, sealing off John Travolta from the rest of the world forever. Tom Cruise, Kris Statlander, and Candy Floss approach Tucor. Tucor looks at all three of them, his human-like eyes chilling them to the core.
[ Candy Floss ] He saved my life... Tom, now that we have the Real Ultimate Power, can you help him? He was once a great warrior named Tommaso Ciampa... one of the best, when he could be bothered t' actually show up on time 'n perform.
Cruise looks at Tucor and raises an eyebrow. He approaches him and places his hand on Tucor's multi-colored beak. After what feels like forever, Tom Cruise lets go and takes a step back. Cruise looks disappointed. He shakes his head.
[ Tom Cruise ] No.
Candy's shoulders slump. Statlander just glares at Tucor, sympathetic.
[ Tom Cruise ] He's been trapped in this form too long now. I'm afraid Tomato Chomper is gone forever. Not even the Real Ultimate Power can save him now. There's nothing left of the once great warrior inside this creepy bird monster.
The fans "AWWWW" in unison, disappointed. Tom Cruise glares at Tucor and then offers his hand.
[ Tom Cruise ] Except his heart.
Tom Cruise and Tucor shake hands on the stage. Candy Floss hugs Tucor around his giant furry waist. The fans are cheering loudly. The Rock suddenly kips back up in the ring and touches his face where the bottle exploded on him. The Rock steps through the ropes and power walks up the ramp, stopping as he comes face to face with Tom Cruise. Tom Cruise and The Rock stare each other down as Floss and Statlander look from one to the other. The Rock produces a microphone from nowhere.
[ The Rock ] Finally...
The fans begin cheering loudly.
[ The Rock ] THE HOLD OF SCIENTOLOGY HAS BEEN BROKEN ON THE ROCK!
The cheers... they become even louder.
[ The Rock ] The Rock says this... the last fourteen years have been a blur, mama! The Rock has been a slave to Xenu whether The Rock likes it or not... but for the first time, The Rock sees... CUH-LEAR-LEEEEEE!
The Rock whips his head around and raises The People's Eyebrow.
[ The Rock ] And The Rock has Tom Cruise, Candy Floss, and Kris Statlander--
The Rock looks at Tucor and tilts his head to the side.
[ The Rock ] And ya' creepy ass bird monster... to thank.
The Rock turns and looks out at the fans.
[ The Rock ] Enjoy the rest o' the show, jabronis! Your host, the two-time SGW World Heavyweight Champion is OUTTIE!
And then he tilts his head back.
[ The Rock ] IF YA' SMELLLLLLLLLLLL-LALALALALALA-LOW!
He uses his hand to lower his chin and turn his head.
[ The Rock ] WHAT THE ROCK... IS COOKIN'!
The Rock's music hits and he storms through the curtain, leaving Tom Cruise, Statlander, Floss, and Tucor alone. As soon as he steps through the curtain, his music cuts and we're left in silence again. Tom Cruise turns to address Statlander and Floss.
[ Tom Cruise ] You crazy girls did a good thing tonight. We've kept the Real Ultimate Power away from John Travolta and thwarted Dr. Cube once again... now, for the safety of the world and the future of Solid Gold Wrestling... I think it's best that I hang on to the Real Ultimate Power. With Real Ultimate Power comes Real Ultimate Responsibility.
Statlander and Floss look at each other and nod.
[ Tom Cruise ] I heard that from my friend Spider-Man.
[ Candy Floss ] Well, I mean, it's a little bit different from what he says-
[ Tom Cruise ] Spider-Man wanted me to play him in the big screen adaptation of his life but the studio went with Andrew Garfield instead.
[ Candy Floss ] He isn't real, though.
[ Tom Cruise ] Anything is real, Candy Floss.
He gives her the Tom Cruise movie star wink.
[ Tom Cruise ] If you believe.
[ Candy Floss ] See, I don't know what that means.
Tom Cruise turns and addresses the fans.
[ Tom Cruise ] Enjoy the rest of the show, everybody! It's WrestleBrawl 3! I'M UNDEFEATED AT WRESTLEBRAWL!
He jumps in the air and pumps his fist.
[ Tom Cruise ] I LOVE WRESTLEBRAWLLLLLLLLL!
He runs full sprint through the curtain, leaving Tucor, Floss, and Statlander on the stage. The camera zooms in on their confused faces as we cut to the back.
struts confidently backstage, taking a huge drink of water from a
bottle. He swishes the water around in his mouth and spits it into a
nearby garbage can and dumps some of the water on top of his head.
Zahra Schreiber grabs Charlotte's ankle as soon as the match starts, allowing Gionna to attack her from behind. However, Charlotte anticipates this and throws a back elbow, catching Gionna in the eye! Charlotte kicks Zahra off of her and advances on Gionna, nailing her with a chop that reverberates throughout the arena! The fans "WOOOO!" in unison as Flair keeps going, landing another and another and another!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Every single one of those chops sounds more painful than the last!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] She's channeling her father with each one! The same father that Gionna Daddio and Zahra Schreiber disrespected two weeks ago at No Competition!
[ Scott Steiner ] Normally I'd be pissed about a couple o' nobodies disrespectin' a true SGW legend... but since Ric Flair ain't a real legend, I don't give a shit! I shit on the idea that this Charlotte Flair broad is special just 'cause Ric Flair spit 'er out the tip of his wrinkled old dingus! Personally, I wanna see this spicy Italian broad get the win and then engage in a very special celebration with this hoochie with the prison tats!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] There's a lot to unpack--
[ Scott Steiner ] And by very special celebration, I mean H... L... A and what that means is--
[ Nigel McGuinness ] We know what it means, Scott. For God's sake.
[ Scott Steiner ] HOT! LESBIAN! ACTION!
[ Tony Schiavone ] There you have it, folks.
Gionna has been beaten until her eyes are nearly rolling into the back of her head. Flair grabs Gionna by the hair and tilts her head back before delivering a brutal overhand chop that causes Gionna to fall into a seated position on the mat. Charlotte begins kicking away at Gionna's head and chest before reaching down and dragging her into the center of the ring by her ankle. She goes to lock on the FIGURE EIGHT but Zahra Schreiber hops onto the apron, distracting Paul Turner! The fans boo loudly as Charlotte stops applying the hold and walks over the ropes, pushing Paul Turner out of the way and grabbing Zahra by the hair! Zahra tries to beg her off but Charlotte just smirks... and nails Zahra with a big right hand! Zahra bumps on the apron and tumbles to the floor!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That's what you get for sticking your nose where it doesn't belong!
[ Scott Steiner ] She got more business in that ring than a Flair!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Did you just say Zahra Schreiber has more business in a wrestling ring than a member of the Flair family?
[ Scott Steiner ] God damn right, I did! I stand by it, too! Ric Flair is a disgrace and anybody he ejaculated into this business is a disgrace and everybody KNOWS what that means! Charlotte Flair is a disgrace and I'm ready to see her fuckin' lose tonight, just another victim of the blonde bombshell, my Gangster Bitch Barbie, Gionna Daddio!
The fans cheer loudly and Flair turns around into a running dropkick from Daddio! Flair staggers back into the ropes, seated on the middle. Gionna rolls back to her feet and advances on Charlotte but Charlotte boots her in the mid-section and returns to her feet, hanging onto the top rope. Gionna is doubled over and Flair places her finger under Gionna's chin, using it to tilt her chin up before DRILLING HER with a huge chop! "WOOOOOOOOO!" says the fans and Gionna reels, turning around and clutching her chest with tears in her eyes. Flair spins Gionna around and hooks her, drilling her with a snap suplex and then returning to her feet. Flair slings the hair out of her face and looms over Daddio, shouting "GET UP, GIONNA! THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED, LITTLE GIRL! WELL, HERE IT IS!" Gionna rolls over onto all fours and tries to crawl away but Flair grabs the back of her tights, yanks her up and drills her with a BACK SUPLEX!
[ Tony Schiavone ] This is not going how Gionna Daddio hoped, you have to imagine!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Do ya' think?!
Flair KIPS UP and the fans pop huge. She walks a semi-circle around the ring with her arms outstretched, soaking in the cheers of the fans. Gionna rolls over on her side, favoring her back. Flair snatches up Gionna's ankle and goes for the Figure Eight again... only to see Zahra entering the ring with a STEEL CHAIR! However, before Zahra can even take a step toward Charlotte, she's grabbed around the ankles... by RIC FLAIR! Ric Flair drags Zahra out of the ring and she swings the chair at him! Flair ducks it and nails her with a BIG CHOP! "WOOOO!" Another chop! Another! Another! And Ric Flair dumps her over the rail and into the front row! AND NOW HE'S STRUTTING! "WOOOOOOOO!" The fans are losing their minds! Paul Turner is watching this unfold at ringside and he doesn't see... VIPRESS crawl out from under the ring and slide under the bottom rope! Charlotte quickly lets go of the Figure Eight and meets Vipress coming in with a RUNNING BIG BOOT that knocks her through the ropes and onto the apron!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What the hell is Vipress doing out here!?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I... I'm just as confused as you are, Tony!
Charlotte watches as Vipress tumbles onto the floor and brushes the hair out of her face. However, she turns around to return to the match... and walks right into the 201 FACEBREAKER! The fans erupt in boos as Gionna covers Flair and hooks the leg, shrieking at the referee to count! Paul Turner slides into position! One! Two! Three!
- WINNER -
The fans erupt in boos as Gionna Daddio quickly rolls out of the ring, looking like she's been through hell. Zahra Schreiber meets her at the foot of the stage and they quickly collect Vipress and begin backing up the ramp, all three women having took some nasty shots.
[ Tony Schiavone ] You've gotta be kidding me!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Charlotte Flair was prepared for Zahra and Gionna... but she wasn't prepared for the surprise third part of the equation... the mysterious Vipress!
[ Tony Schiavone ] First, Charlotte Flair's back-up was denied entry into the arena tonight and now this! It's almost as though she were set up to fail tonight! What is the story behind this strange alliance of Gionna Daddio, Zahra Schreiber, and Vipress!?
[ Scott Steiner ] You two can cry all you want about Charlotte Flair gettin' fuckin' robbed of her big moment tonight but the true victim at WrestleBrawl 3?! ME! Because I was robbed of seein' three beautiful women with faaaat asses share a victory kiss with touchin' and feelin' and then their hands get real low and then those clothes start t' get real hot and real itchy and they got to come off--
There's a sound of a water bottle being sprayed.
[ Scott Steiner ] God dammit, what the fuck are you doin', Hugh Grant!?
We hear Nigel huff loudly.
[ Tony Schiavone ] There you have it once again, folks!
Inside the ring, we see "The Nature Boy" Ric Flair checking on Charlotte. She's in a seated position in the middle of the ring with tears in her eyes. On the stage, we see Vipress and Zahra standing on either side of Gionna, raising her arms in victory. We head backstage as the unlikely celebration continues.
limousine slowly creeps into the back part of the arena as the
cameraman stations himself at the passenger side door. As the driver
gets out and opens the door, we get a dramatic low-level shot of
Dave Batista exiting, wearing a custom-made black suit. He snaps the
lapels and looks around, taking an inventory of his surroundings.
We fade up on a shot of Justin Roberts standing in the middle of the ring with a microphone. Standing on either side of him, we see Aubrey Edwards and Mike Chioda. Aubrey Edwards is holding the prized Golden Ticket in both hands at waist level. The fans are buzzing with anticipation. Justin Roberts raises the microphone and speaks.
[ Justin Roberts ] Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for the third-ever... WRESTLEBRAWL match!
The fans cheer loudly.
[ Justin Roberts ] The rules are as follows... two men will begin the match... every two minutes, another competitor will enter the ring. Eliminations may only occur by throwing your opponent over the top rope... with both feet touching the floor!
He gestures toward Aubrey holding the Golden Ticket.
[ Justin Roberts ] The winner of the match will receive the Golden Ticket, which may be cashed in at any time for anything the holder desires within the power of the Championship Committee to deliver!
The fans are on their feet, ready to go.
[ Justin Roberts ] And now... the man who drew NUMBER ONE!
"Unscripted Violence" hits and Jon Moxley walks out from behind the curtain, drawing a big pop from the crowd. He doesn't make a show of it, he just walks straight to the ring, focused on getting the job done.
[ Tony Schiavone ] Look at the face of Jon Moxley... that's the face of a man who knows he's got a long night ahead of him, guys.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] At No Competition, Jon Moxley battled PAC in a match to determine who would enter numba' one and who would enter numba' thirty... unfortunately for the Death Rider, he drew the short straw and that's what we're witnessing right now.
[ Scott Steiner ] I was talkin' to Jon Moxley earlier tonight and I can tell you two right now, this mother fucker ain't got no fear! He knows what he's walkin' into and he's ready for it! Say what you want about this guy and his fuckin' chances of walkin' outta here the winner tonight, but he's one tough son of a bitch!
[ Tony Schiavone ] No one's saying it can't be done, Scott. It was at WrestleBrawl 2 in 2006 that Raven won from the number two position, last eliminating Rob Conway!
[ Scott Steiner ] WHO!?
Moxley rolls under the bottom rope and stomps across the ring, radiating intensity. He looks around at the fans, clenching and unclenching his fists, ready to throw down. His music cuts and Justin Roberts continues.
[ Justin Roberts ] And his opponent... the man who drew... NUMBER TWOOOOOOO!
"Worlds Apart" hits and the fans erupt in boos as Sami Zayn sulks out from the back, looking PISSED, with Gregory Helms in tow. Zayn stands on the stage, looking down the ramp at the ring, scowling. The fans really let him have it, booing him intensely.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Here comes a man wit' somethin' t' prove, gentlemen!
[ Tony Schiavone ] It was only a bit ago, earlier tonight, that Sami Zayn was defeated by Ruby Riott!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Losing the SGW Limitless Championship in the process!
[ Tony Schiavone ] You have to believe he's out for blood! He wants to regain that lost momentum!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Oh you bet'cha, Tony. It's hard t' get ahead in this business without momentum!
[ Scott Steiner ] Ain't that the god damn truth! Two things you fuckin' need in this business... thick skin 'n fuckin' momentum! And also the uncanny fuckin' ability to shit all over talented guys that contribute to your company and make your community better all 'cause you're on a power trip and ain't nobody gonna tell you different!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What?
[ Scott Steiner ] WHAT?!
Sami Zayn makes his way up the steps and keeps his eye on Moxley as he steps through the ropes. Zayn removes his jacket and psyches himself up. Justin Roberts and Mike Chioda exit the ring. Sami Zayn and Jon Moxley stand in opposite corners as Aubrey Edwards walks to the center of the ring and holds up the Golden Ticket before exiting the ring herself. Mike Chioda calls for the bell to begin the match!
The bell sounds and Jon Moxley meets Sami Zayn in the center of the ring. The fans are buzzing with electricity, standing on their feet, ready to see this match get underway. Gregory Helms is at ringside, pounding on the mat frantically. Moxley and Zayn get nose to nose with Sami Zayn talking trash and jamming his finger into Moxley's chest, letting him know how this match is gonna go... but then Moxley punches Zayn right in the mouth! The fans pop huge as Moxley peppers Zayn with right hands, driving him back into the corner! Zayn throws his arms up, trying to block but Moxley is relentless, throwing uppercuts and getting underneath Sami's guard!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Jon Moxley is giving Sami Zayn the business!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He knows the only way to survive early on is to take guys out quick so he's got time to rest between intervals!
Moxley reaches down and hooks Sami's leg, trying to lift him over the top rope but Sami hooks his arms around the top rope and uses his free leg to boot Moxley in the chest, sending him reeling backward! Moxley staggers out and spins around with his back to the ropes... just in time for Sami Zayn to charge at him with a RUNNING YAKUZA KICK but Moxley ducks it and Zayn's leg flies over the top rope, crotching him! The fans pop huge! Moxley punches away at Zayn until he tumbles over the top rope, landing on the apron! Moxley throws a haymaker and Zayn blocks it before nailing Moxley with a punch of his own! Moxley staggers back and Zayn uses the top rope to propel himself back into the ring, drilling Moxley with a DDT! Both men are down as the timer counts down from ten!
#3 KILLER KROSS
[ Scott Steiner ] Now, here comes a real bad mother fucker!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Killer Kross! A vicious competitor that's looking to make an impact!
The fans boo loudly as Killer Kross appears on the stage with Dr. Stevie in tow. Kross is wringing his hands together, gritting his teeth, ready to dish out punishment. He charges down to the ring and slides under the bottom rope, immediately descending on Jon Moxley and pulling him back up to his feet with hands on either side of his head. He whips Moxley into the ropes and drives into the mat with a power slam! Moxley writhes around on the mat, favoring his back. Sami Zayn scrambles back to his feet, his back resting against the ropes. Killer Kross charges at him but Zayn drops and pulls down the top rope! Killer Kross tumbles over the top rope, onto the apron! Zayn returns to his feet and immediately dives out of the way, allowing a charging Jon Moxley to knock Killer Kross off the apron!
[ Scott Steiner ] You gotta be kiddin' me! That big jacked mother fucker is already out!?
ELIMINATED - KILLER KROSS
As soon as Kross hits the floor, Sami Zayn dumps Jon Moxley from behind! Sami Zayn staggers out into the middle of the ring, dropping to his knees and celebrating! But the fans pop huge as they realize Moxley wasn't eliminated! He pulls himself up and steps back into the ring. Sami Zayn slowly stands and turns around... only to get a kick in the gut... PARADIGM SHIFT! The fans pop huge! Moxley sits up next to Zayn and dusts his hands off as the timer begins counting down once again!
#4 CHRIS JERICHO
Boos emanate from deep in the heart of the arena as Chris Jericho walks out onto the stage with Jake Hager in tow! Jericho appears to be in a foul mood as he makes his way down to the ring, jawing back and forth with angry fans!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Hold on, didn't he steal TK Cooper's number earlier?!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] That, he did! But it seems as though he didn't inspect what number Cooper had drawn himself! Chris Jericho has traded numba' twelve for lucky numba' four!
Jericho slides under the bottom rope and meets Moxley face to face in the middle of the ring! They jaw back and forth before Moxley headbutts Jericho in the nose! Jericho staggers back and then lunges forward, drilling Moxley with a forearm to the jaw! Moxley and Jericho trade punches and forearms like men possessed until Jericho casually deflects a punch from Moxley and kicks him low! The fans boo loudly as Jericho smiles and guides Moxley toward the ropes by a handful of hair. Jericho tries to force Moxley over the top rope but Moxley elbows his way out, causing Jericho to stagger backward. However, before Moxley can capitalize, Sami Zayn charges out of nowhere and boots Moxley right in the side of the head! Moxley tumbles through the ropes where Jake Hager snatches him off the apron and POWER SLAMS HIM ON THE FLOOR!
[ Tony Schiavone ] WHATAMANEUVER!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Jon Moxley might have just been taken out of the match by Jake Hager!
Hager stands up, pounding his chest and roaring with intensity! Sami Zayn has a huge, cheesy smile on his face but Jericho isn't having it, chopping Zayn in the throat and clotheslining him over the top rope and onto the apron! Hager charges at Zayn, trying to clothesline his legs out from under him but Zayn jumps Hager's arm and spins around, nailing a running boot to Hager's face! Hager staggers out and goes down! Zayn turns around and Jericho tries to clothesline him off the apron but Zayn ducks that, runs and leaps onto the middle turnbuckle from the outside, climbs to the top, and leaps off, nailing Jericho with a FLYING AXE HANDLE! Gregory Helms is losing his mind at ringside, trying to rally the fans who are completely unwilling to be rallied by him! The timer begins counting down!
#5 THE FIEND
The fans boo loudly as The Fiend makes his way out onto the stage with his lantern in one hand and Pepe in the other! Sami Zayn looks on in horror as The Fiend lumbers toward ringside. He places the lantern on the stage and makes his way up the ring steps, still clutching Pepe.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] The bloody Fiend! He stole Pepe from Chavo Guerrero at our first event, SGW Revenge! And now, here he is after an absence... trotting Pepe out for the world t' see!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Where has The Fiend been all this time, Nigel?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I imagine he's been trapped off in his own little world, paranoid, alienating those closest to him while eliminating those he views as threats, no matter the level of personal harm it might do to him and his fragile psyche!
[ Tony Schiavone ] I... I don't understand!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Don't worry about it, Tony. I would estimate it would take roughly eighteen days to tell that whole story.
The Fiend walks across the apron, eyeing Sami Zayn. Moxley returns to his feet and grabs The Fiend by the ankle, trying to slow him down, but The Fiend kicks Moxley away, knocking him backward into the guardrail with supernatural force! Sami Zayn charges over and nails The Fiend with a forearm, trying to knock him off the apron but The Fiend slowly turns around and tilts his head to the side. Zayn backs away, putting his hands up in fear before dropping to his knees! The Fiend steps through the ropes... and Gregory Helms slides under the bottom rope, standing between The Fiend and Sami Zayn, putting his dukes up, ready to fight!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Oh no, Sami. This is not smart!
The Fiend looks at Pepe and then at Helms... but before The Fiend can do anything, Chavo Guerrero, Jr. emerges from the back to a huge pop! Chavo runs full speed down the ramp and leaps onto the apron, shouting at The Fiend and getting his attention! The Fiend slowly turns around, clutching Pepe, and lays eyes on Chavo! Chavo points at Pepe and begins yelling, "That's MY friend! Not yours! Give me Pepe back, esse!" The Fiend looks down at Pepe and advances on Chavo! Chavo reaches out and grabs Pepe by his stick! The Fiend and Chavo struggle for possession of Pepe until Chavo hops off the apron, still gripping Pepe's stick! The Fiend leans over the top rope, trying to maintain control... but Sami Zayn and Gregory Helms charge up behind The Fiend and dump him over the top rope to the floor!
[ Tony Schiavone ] MIRACLES CAN HAPPEN!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] With the assist from Chavo bloody Guerrero, Jr.!
ELIMINATED - THE FIEND
The fans pop huge! The Fiend lands on his feet but Chavo wrenches Pepe away from his grip! Chavo backs up the ramp, fear in his eyes, as The Fiend advances on him! However, before The Fiend can do anything, Gregory Helms launches off the apron nails him with a flying KNEE TO THE BACK! The impact sends The Fiend forward... INTO A SHOT WITH PEPE RIGHT TO THE HEAD! The Fiend goes down and Chavo escapes to the back as the timer begins counting down!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Chavo and Pepe have been reunited!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] What a feel good moment! Who is joining us next!?
#6 COLT CABANA
Colt Cabana charges out from the back to a huge pop! As he's running down the ramp, The Fiend returns to his feet... and CABANA NAILS HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE THAT TURNS HIM INSIDE OUT! The fans lose it! Cabana slides underneath the bottom rope and immediately nails Sami Zayn with a clothesline! Chris Jericho is posting up in the corner and Cabana charges at him... "FLYING ASSHOOOOOOOLE!" and sandwiches Jericho against the turnbuckles! Cabana rebounds out of the corner... and Jon Moxley charges at him! Moxley goes for a clothesline but Cabana runs underneath it, causing Moxley to collide with Jericho! Moxley and Jericho are staggered in the corner as Cabana cries out... "FLYING ASSHOOOOOOLE!" and sandwiches both men!
[ Scott Steiner ] God damn! I hate this jack-off comedy bullshit! Somebody this guy out before I get in there and do it myself!
The fans are losing their minds as Cabana is a house of fire! Sami Zayn returns to his feet, looking out of it. Cabana points at him, a huge smile on his face, and shouts "TIME TO HEAD TO THE PAY WINDA', BUDDY!" He takes Sami Zayn by the back of the head and guides him toward the ropes. Cabana casually tosses Sami Zayn over the top rope and onto the apron! The fans gasp and are ready to pop with Zayn's elimination! Cabana throws a big punch and Zayn blocks it, nailing Cabana with one of his own... but then Cabana nails Zayn with a straight punch! Zayn almost tumbles but hangs onto the top rope with one hand! Cabana smacks Zayn's hand and he lets go before grabbing the top rope with the other hand! Cabana smacks that hand and Zayn switches again! Cabana smacks THAT hand and Zayn switches again, barely managing to hold on each time! The timer begins to count down!
[ Scott Steiner ] For real, somebody eliminate this fuckin' goober!
#7 STEVE CORINO
The fans instantly shit all over everything as Steve Corino emerges from the back with a cocky smile on his face! Corino lethargically jogs down to the ring before sliding under the bottom rope. Without wasting any time, Corino charges up behind Colt Cabana and nails him with a forearm to the back, sending him careening forward as Sami Zayn pulls down the top rope, allowing Cabana to fall to the floor, eliminated!
[ Scott Steiner ] YOU'RE MY GOD DAMN HERO, CORINO! I HATE YOU BUT YOU'RE A HERO!
ELIMINATED - COLT CABANA
The fans erupt in boos as Cabana is unceremoniously eliminated! Sami Zayn quickly rolls under the bottom rope and back into the ring! Steve Corino turns his attention to Jon Moxley and begins trying to force him over the top rope. Jericho joins in and they've almost got Moxley forced over the top rope! Moxley desperately grasps the middle and bottom ropes, kicking erratically and trying to maintain his grip! Sami Zayn falls into a seated position in the opposite corner, watching as they struggle to eliminate Moxley and the timer begins to count down!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Look at the teamwork going into eliminating Jon Moxley!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He's one o' the biggest dogs in the fight, Tony! They gotta get him outta there!
#8 CM PUNK
CM Punk emerges from the back and drops to one knee on the stage before looking down at his wrist and declaring "IT'S FUCKIN'... CLOBBERIN' TIIIIIIIIIIME!" Punk stomps down the ramp and slides into the ring, immediately clubbing Chris Jericho in the back! Jericho turns around and begins trading forearms with CM Punk! Moxley manages to elbow Corino off of him and tumbles back into the ring, landing awkwardly on his feet. Moxley and Corino begin trading punches as Jericho and Punk go at it on the opposite side of the ring. Sami Zayn continues watching, licking his lips as he anxiously waits, preparing to pick a spot.
[ Tony Schiavone ] CM Punk is here! We haven't seen him since Holiday Hell!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] And you know he's got somethin' t' prove after how he departed us last time!
[ Scott Steiner ] Look at this Sami Zayn punk, sittin' on his ass, pickin' his spots! What a fuckin' loser! No wonder he lost to that bird face girl earlier tonight! Whoever told his asshole he could wrestle men!?
CM Punk gets Jericho reeling with a series of right hands and open hand slaps before knocking his head off his shoulders with a big roundhouse kick! The impact sends Jericho spinning out and he staggers back against the ropes. Punk clothesline him over the top rope and Jericho barely manages to hang on! Punk throws a spinning back fist but Jericho ducks it and nails him with a shoulder through the middle ropes! He hooks Punk's head and brings him over the top rope with a SUPLEX but Punk drives a knee into the top of Jericho's head and lands on the apron next to him! Punk and Jericho punch and elbow each other, trying to knock the other off but they won't go! Punk manages to sweep Jericho's legs and Jericho goes down on the apron... only to roll back under the bottom rope! Jericho quickly rises to his feet and charges, hitting the ropes. He runs back toward Punk, full blast, but Punk leaps and nails Jericho with a SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK as the timer counts down!
#9 MAXWELL JACOB FRIEDMAN
The fans boo loudly as Maxwell Jacob Friedman makes his way out to the stage! Friedman throws his scarf to the side and runs down to ringside, sliding underneath the bottom rope and going right after Jon Moxley! Friedman and Corino pummel Moxley, knocking him down to all fours. They drag Moxley back up and drag him toward the ropes but he comes alive, nailing Corino with an elbow to the mid-section before hooking him for the PARADIGM SHIFT... but Friedman cuts him off with a forearm to the back!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Why would you stop another man from hurting someone else in this environment? There's literally no benefit to it!
[ Scott Steiner ] It's these young guys, George Attenborough! They're dumb as fuck!
Jericho struggles back to his feet and CM Punk is sizing him up. Jericho slowly turns around and Punk goes for a ROUNDHOUSE KICK but Jericho ducks it and dives out of the way as Sami Zayn comes out of the corner full blast and nails Punk with a RUNNING BOOT! Punk goes down in a heap and Jericho descends on him, grabbing two handfuls of hair and dragging him back to his feet! Jericho jerks his thumb toward Sami Zayn and shouts "GET OVER HERE AND HELP ME, ASS FACE!"
[ Scott Steiner ] That's right, Zayn! You fat shit! Follow the lead of a real man!
[ Tony Schiavone ] I'm surprised to hear you say that about Chris Jericho!
[ Scott Steiner ] Don't get it twisted, Tony! Chris Jericho ain't cut from the same cloth as a real REAL man like yours truly! But compared to punks like Sami Zayn or CM Punk, Chris Jericho is a testosterone fueled, bad mother fucker!
Sami Zayn and Jericho both grab Punk and try to toss him over the top but Punk tangles himself in the ropes, refusing to cooperate as the timer begins to count down once again!
#10 JIMMY HAVOC
The fans pop huge as Jimmy Havoc walks through the curtain in his trench coat and studded mask, clutching his axe in his hand. His other hand is bandaged heavily, still injured from his daring escape at Heartbreaker! Havoc looks down at the axe and then begins walking with purpose toward the ring! Havoc discards his mask and trench coat but carries the axe into the ring with him! Steve Corino charges at him and gets an axe handle to the mid-section! Maxwell Jacob Friedman rushes him and walks into a boot to the stomach! Havoc looks down at the axe, smirks, and then raises it over his head!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Oh my goodness, NO! HE CAN'T--
[ Scott Steiner ] Hell yeah! Do it, you fuckin' emo skeleton!
But before Havoc cause murder Friedman in the middle of the ring, Jon Moxley blindsides him with a running forearm to the side of the head! Havoc goes down and Moxley picks up the axe, looking down at it quizzically before shrugging and tossing it over the top rope to the floor. Havoc scrambles back to his feet and gets right in Moxley's face! Moxley and Havoc go nose to nose as the fans begin chanting "HOLY SHIT!" at the mere thought of these two going at it!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Now this... THIS IS A FIGHT!
However, before they can even touch, they're blindsided by Sami Zayn and Chris Jericho, who have abandoned CM Punk in order to focus on the two perceived heavy hitters! Zayn pairs off with Moxley as Jericho gives his all to Jimmy Havoc! The timer begins to count down!
#11 NIA JAX
The fans pop huge as Nia Jax emerges from behind the curtain, pounding her fist into her open palm! Nia Jax makes her way down the ramp, high fiving fans all the way down! Jax stomps up the steps and enters the ring, looking around the ring for the first person to hit! However, before she can choose, Maxwell Jacob Friedman charges at her! Nia Jax scoops him up mid-run into a SAMOAN DROP POSITION... and DUMPS HIM OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR! The fans pop huge!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Did that just happen!?
[ Tony Schiavone ] Indeed! That just happened!
ELIMINATED - MAXWELL JACOB FRIEDMAN
Friedman looks up the floor, shocked! Nia Jax points down at him, "HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, HUH!? I'VE ELIMINATED YOU FROM THE WRESTLEBRAWL WITH MY SAMOAN DROP AND NOW I WILL WIN THE WRESTLE--" and Jimmy Havoc dumps Nia Jax over the top rope to the floor out of nowhere! The fans boo loudly as Nia Jax tumbles off the apron and onto the floor.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Jimmy freakin' Havoc!
[ Tony Schiavone ] You know, there has been a lot more interaction between Jimmy Havoc and Nia Jax in this company than I would have ever imagined when I signed on the dotted line!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] You ain't kiddin'.
ELIMINATED - NIA JAX
Jimmy Havoc looks down at Nia Jax with a smug look on his face... and instantly gets dumped by Chris Jericho! But Havoc hangs on, gripping the top rope for dear life! Jericho tries prying his fingers off but Havoc lets go just long enough to punch Jericho in the face and climb back into the ring! Havoc stays on Jericho, punching away at him until Steve Corino comes out of nowhere with a SUPER KICK that puts Havoc flat on his back! Jericho directs traffic and he and Corino each take Havoc by his tights and t-shirt, pulling him up to his feet. They attempt to heave-ho him over the top rope but Havoc hangs onto the top rope and fights them off until Jon Moxley returns to the fray and nails Corino in the back, breaking him off from the attempt to eliminate Havoc. Havoc elbows his way out and lands back in the ring, booting Jericho in the gut before turning him inside out with the ACID RAINMAKER as the timer begins counting down!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That's his move!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] The Acid Rainmaker! He got all of it!
[ Scott Steiner ] It ain't no Steiner Line but I guess it'll do the trick!
#12 TK COOPER
The fans boo loudly as TK Cooper and Dahlia Black walk out onto the stage, hand in hand. They begin aggressively making out and Dahlia leaps up onto Cooper, wrapping her legs around his waist and grabbing handfuls of his hair. The fans shit all over this as Cooper falls flat on his back and Dahlia begins gyrating on top of him as mothers and fathers cover the eyes of young fans close enough to see what's going on in graphic detail!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Oh my! This... this is just wrong! Children are watching!
[ Scott Steiner ] Freakzilla's goin' six to midnight, boys!
Inside the ring, Sami Zayn attacks Jimmy Havoc from behind, preventing him from eliminating Chris Jericho. Zayn pummels Havoc across the back with a series of forearms but Havoc refuses to go down, though every blow visibly jars him, causing him to grit his teeth. Zayn takes a handful of Havoc's hair and drags him toward the ropes but Havoc elbows his way out and grabs Zayn by the hair, drilling him with a headbutt and dumping him through the ropes to the floor! Havoc stumbles into the ropes, sitting on the middle rope. Steve Corino approaches him and Havoc comes alive, booting him in the stomach before even returning to a standing position. Corino goes for a clothesline and Havoc ducks, causing Corino to spin out and end up with his back against the ropes. Havoc clotheslines Corino over the top rope and onto the apron where he lands on his feet! Chris Jericho charges up behind Havoc and Havoc moves out of the way! Jericho and Corino almost collide but Jericho stops himself! Jericho turns around and ducks a RUNNING BOOT from Havoc! The boot catches Corino right in the face but Corino falls flat back on the apron and grabs onto the bottom rope, keeping himself being eliminated! Jericho and Havoc begin trading forearms as the timer counts down once again!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Neither Havoc or Jericho are willing to back down!
#13 BRYAN DANIELSON
Bryan Danielson stalks out from the back and glares down the ramp at the ring. Mere feet away from him, TK Cooper an Dahlia Black continue feverishly making out. Danielson shakes his head in disgust before shoving Dahlia Black off of Cooper to a huge pop! Cooper looks shocked as Danielson grabs him by the hair and drags him off the stage, running down to the ring with him in tow! Danielson slings Cooper underneath the bottom rope and into the ring! TK Cooper staggers back to his feet just as Danielson enters the ring... and IMMEDIATELY CLOTHESLINES HIM OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] GOODBYE, TK COOPA'!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Bryan Danielson has ARRIVED!
[ Scott Steiner ] Yeah, he tossed that scrawny, flaccid Samoan dude outta' there but what's he gonna do when he's faced with a real man!? Bryan Danielson is nobody! He's always been nobody! Tossin' out some dumb fuck wearin' a romper don't prove nothin'!
ELIMINATED - TK COOPER
Danielson hocks and spits over the top rope at Cooper, who just looks on in surprise! Danielson smiles and turns around, finding himself face to face with Chris Jericho and Steve Corino, who have dispatched Havoc on the mat, mere feet away! Danielson looks from Jericho to Corino and smiles before raising two middle fingers and shouting "FUCK YOU BOTH!" Jericho and Corino both go after him but Danielson ducks a haymaker from Jericho, hits the ropes, and NAILS STEVE CORINO WITH THE RUNNING KNEE STRIKE! Jericho is so taken aback that he doesn't see Jon Moxley coming up behind him! He whips Jericho around... PARADIGM SHIFT-- NO! Jericho elbows his way out of it and shoves Moxley back... ONLY TO GET SCOOPED UP AND NAILED WITH GO TO SLEEEEEEEEEP BY CM PUNK! Jericho is out on his feet... AND DANIELSON PUTS HIM DOWN WITH THE RUNNING KNEE STRIKE!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] IN! THE! FACE!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That will certainly give you Excedrin Headache #9!
Danielson rests on one knee as he looks up at Moxley and CM Punk, an arrogant smirk on his face. Moxley wipes the sweat off his face and points at Sami Zayn. Zayn begins backing away in fear, begging them off. The fans are buzzing with electricity... but their attention falls away from Sami Zayn as the timer begins counting down!
#14 AL SNOW
The fans cheer as Al Snow emerges from the back with The Blue Meanie! They both run down to the ring at full speed! The Blue Meanie hits the ring first and CM Punk catches him coming in... GO TO SLEEP! The Blue Meanie is OUT ON HIS FEET! CM Punk flings him over the top rope to the floor as soon as Al Snow hits the ring! Snow is a house of fire! Big right hands to Jon Moxley! Kick to the stomach of Bryan Danielson! Short arm clothesline to CM Punk! Al Snow is motioning for everyone to bring it on! Sami Zayn charges at him with a BIG BOOT but Snow ducks it and catches Zayn on the turnaround... SNOW PLOW!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Al Snow is on fire!
[ Scott Steiner ] Are you fuckin' kiddin' me right now!? Al Snow!? Fuck outta' here, Al Snow!
The fans don't know what to think as Al Snow runs the table! Steve Corino charges at Snow and Snow ducks a clothesline! Corino turns around and Snow nails him with a jab to the throat! Corino staggers back against the ropes and Al Snow charges at him... only for Corino to drop and pull down the top rope! Snow tumbles onto the apron but manages to hang on! Corino turns and Snow punches him in the throat again! He tries to suplex Corino over the top and onto the apron but CORINO IS JUST TOO FAT! Corino elbows his way out of it and suplexes Al Snow back into the ring as the timer counts down!
[ Scott Steiner ] Ain't nobody liftin' that fat fuck!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Being of Steve Corino's size is certainly an advantage in this match!
[ Scott Steiner ] The Origin ain't nothin' but a bunch of fat, greasy bastards!
#15 JEFF JARRETT
The roof blows off the arena as Jeff Jarrett walks out from the back in his sleeveless entrance robe with a golden guitar! The SGW logo is emblazoned on the back of the guitar as is revealed when he holds it over his head! Jarrett's pyrotechnics explode all around him and he discards his robe before making his way down to the ring with purpose in his step!
[ Tony Schiavone ] JEFF JARRETT IS HERE! THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE TIM STORM!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He's one of the few men who has competed at every WrestleBrawl event along with Shane Douglas, Edge, Christian, and Val Venis! However, unlike any of them... he is UNDEFEATED!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That's right, Nigel! At the original WrestleBrawl pay-per-view, Jeff Jarrett won the WrestleBrawl match to win the vacant SGW World Heavyweight Championship... and at WrestleBrawl 2, he defeated "The Nature Boy" Ric Flair in a Last Man Standing match! And now, here he is... one more time! WrestleBrawl 3!
Jarrett wastes no time, sliding under the bottom rope and meeting a charging Chris Jericho with a boot the the stomach! Jericho staggers back and Corino advances... ONLY TO GET BLASTED WITH A GUITAR SHOT! Corino goes down with the frame of the guitar around his neck! Jericho smiles and... BEGINS TO STRUT! Al Snow charges at Jarrett and Jarrett casually flings him over the top rope the the floor!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] GOOD NIGHT, AL SNOW!
[ Scott Steiner ] Fuck outta' here, Al Snow! You weren't foolin' nobody! Least of all, me!
ELIMINATED - AL SNOW
Jarrett gets attacked from behind by Sami Zayn but Jarrett doesn't go down! Zayn continues the assault, pummeling Jarrett across the back with forearms but Jarrett stumbles forward into the ropes, using them to maintain his balance. He turns around and Sami Zayn throws a clothesline but Jarrett ducks it and catches Zayn... WITH THE STROKE! Sami Zayn is OUT! Jarrett stands over him and finds himself being faced by Jimmy Havoc, Jon Moxley, and CM Punk! Jarrett looks all three up and comers up and down... before motioning for them to bring it on! Punk dives in first and Jarrett immediately backdrops him over the top rope and onto the apron where Punk holds on! Jarrett boots Moxley in the gut and hooks him for a DDT but Jimmy Havoc clotheslines Jarrett right in the throat, knocking him down! Havoc advances on Jarrett but Jarrett grabs him by his tights and pulls him forward, causing him to tumble through the ropes and onto the apron!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Jeff Jarrett is holding everyone off single handedly!
[ Scott Steiner ] Fuckin' legend! That's my boy, alright! Gonna win the whole god damn thing!
Jarrett rises back to his feet and Moxley charges at him only for Jarrett to move! Moxley collides with Havoc, knocking him to the floor! Moxley turns around and Jarrett catches him... WITH THE STROKE! Jarrett is the last man standing as the timer counts down once again!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] There it is! The Stroke on Jon Moxley!
[ Scott Steiner ] Hell yeah! Get 'em Chosen One!
#16 RANDY ORTON
[ Tony Schiavone ] Wait, what?! ARE YOU KIDDING!? THIS IS HAPPENING, GUYS!
[ Scott Steiner ] He's back?! How come nobody told me he was back!?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This is... this is quite the surprise!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Look at the look on Jeff Jarrett's face! It was at Card Subject to Change in January that Jeff Jarrett cost Randy Orton the SGW World Heavyweight Championship, which caused a shift in power, fracturing the Championship Committee and putting the title in the grasps of Arn Anderson and The Origin!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Revenge has to be on the mind of The Legend Killer!
The building QUAKES with boos as Jarrett waits on Orton to emerge from the back... but he never does! Instead, Orton enters from the crowd! The fans try desperately to warn Jarrett but it's too late! Orton slips into the ring behind him and Jarrett turns around... INTO THE RKO! The boos impossibly get louder as Orton scoops Jarrett up and dumps him over the top rope to the floor!
[ Tony Schiavone ] And just like that, Jeff Jarrett has been defeated at WrestleBrawl!
[ Scott Steiner ] Fuckin' bullshit! Randy Orton ain't shit! Fuck him!
ELIMINATED - JEFF JARRETT
Randy Orton smiles evilly, trembling with intensity as he looks over the top rope at the downed Jarrett, who isn't moving at all! Orton runs his hands over his head, clearly satisfied by what he's done! However, before Orton can do anything else, he's tackled from behind and dumped over the top rope by Jon Moxley!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] WHAT?! ORTON IS GONE!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Jon Moxley just took out the trash!
[ Scott Steiner ] Serves that punk right!
ELIMINATED - RANDY ORTON
Orton lands on all fours next to Jarrett! Orton looks furious but quickly snaps out of it and grabs Jarrett by the hair, dragging him back up to all fours before they brawl toward the back until road agents swarm them. Inside the ring, Jon Moxley uses the ropes to pull himself up, still out of it from the Stroke. Sami Zayn comes up behind Moxley and spins him around, attempting to get the jump on him! However, Moxley comes alive, booting Zayn in the gut and nailing him with the PARADIGM SHIFT! Moxley springs back up with all the adrenaline he's got left... and TOSSES SAMI ZAYN TO THE FLOOR!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Jon Moxley is on a tear! He's cleaning house!
ELIMINATED - SAMI ZAYN
The fans pop huge! But then Moxley turns right around... INTO THE JUDAS EFFECT! Moxley tumbles over the top rope and onto the apron... WHERE JAKE HAGER POSITIONS HIMSELF UNDERNEATH AND POWERBOMBS HIM ONTO THE FLOOR, ELIMINATING HIM!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Jesus Christ! Jon Moxley might be dead!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What a phenomenal showing by Jon Moxley!
ELIMINATED - JON MOXLEY
The fans groan at the sight of Moxley's body ragdolling against the floor but before they can dwell on it for too long, the timer begins counting down, signaling the arrival of our next entrant in the match!
#17 ZACK SABRE, JR.
Sabre walks out casually and stands on the stage with a smug look on his face. He unzips his jacket and sets it aside gently before making his way down to the ring with a smug look on his face. He walks past Hager without a passing glance and climbs onto the apron. As soon as he steps through the ropes, Jericho greets him with a boot to the stomach! Jericho takes Sabre by the back of the head and tosses him over the top rope, onto the apron! Sabre regains his footing and hangs onto the top rope. Jericho throws a punch but Sabre ducks it and nails Jericho with a forearm of his own! Jericho staggers backward and Sabre steps back through the ropes.
[ Tony Schiavone ] Zack Sabre, Jr. isn't going down that easily!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He's one of the most resilient young competitors on the roster and I've heard he's got quite the interesting plan should that Golden Ticket come his way tonight!
[ Scott Steiner ] What's this guy weigh, huh? Ninety-eight pounds? I take shits bigger 'n Zack Sabre, Jr.! I'm gonna use that sumbitch as a toothpick when I get done eatin' tonight!
Bryan Danielson comes out of nowhere, nailing Sabre with a European uppercut! Sabre and Danielson trade brutally stiff uppercuts and forearms before Sabre takes over with a knee lift and slings Danielson halfway across the ring with a double underhook suplex! As soon as Sabre stands, he gets scooped by CM Punk! Punk's going for GO TO SLEEP... but Sabre repositions himself, wrapping his legs around Punk's head and locking in a VERTICAL TRIANGLE CHOKE!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Look at this! Innovative offense by Sabre!
[ Scott Steiner ] Just powerbomb his ass, Punk! Fuckin' powerbomb his skinny ass!
Sabre wrenches on the hold as tightly as he can and Punk tumbles over the top rope! Sabre hangs onto the top rope and Punk falls to the floor!
[ Tony Schiavone ] There goes CM Punk! What an impressive elimination by Zack Sabre, Jr.!
ELIMINATED - CM PUNK
Sabre climbs back into the ring with a satisfied look on his face as the timer begins counting down!
#18 DAVE BATISTA
The roof blows off the place as Dave Batista emerges from the back and makes his way down to the ring with an arrogant look on his face. Batista walks up the steps and suddenly becomes dead serious as he eyeballs everyone in the ring before stepping through the ropes. As soon as Batista enters the ring, he catches a charging Jimmy Havoc and plants him with a spine buster! Batista springs back to his feet and gets kicked in the thigh by Zack Sabre, Jr.! Batista looks him up and down, face turning red with anger. Without a word, Batista snatches Sabre by the wrist and turns him inside out with a short arm lariat!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Drax the Destroyer is handin' out punishment!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Look at the bodies left in his wake!
Batista turns around and walks right into a SUPER KICK from Steve Corino! Batista shakes it off, completely no-selling it... and boots Corino in the gut! BATISTA BOMB! Batista rolls back to his feet and pumps his fists, yelling "BOOMMMM!" before getting put down with a running face buster from Chris Jericho! As soon as Batista goes down, Bryan Danielson flies off the top rope with a FLYING HEADBUTT! Danielson and Jericho both meet over the fallen Batista, going forehead to forehead as they jaw back and forth! The timer counts down!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Danielson and Jericho! You can smell the intensity!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] They want it bad, gentlemen!
[ Scott Steiner ] Want in one hand, shit in the other! See which one fills up first for Bryan Danielson!
#19 PAUL LONDON
Paul London explodes from the back and run full sprint! He slides under the bottom rope with such velocity that he almost slides all the way out the opposite side! London returns to his feet and immediately ducks a clothesline from Chris Jericho! He catches Jericho on the turnaround with a DROPSAULT, landing on Batista! However, Batista hangs onto him and slowly stands up, carrying London in a fallaway position! Batista uses London as a weapon, swinging him around into Danielson, knocking him down! Corino and Havoc approach but Batista gorilla presses London and throws him into both of them, knocking them down!
[ Scott Steiner ] Hell yeah! That's what I'm talkin' about! Let's see some fuckin' power!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I have to question the strategy of throwing Paul London... into the ring!
[ Scott Steiner ] He's a strong mother fucker! Not a smart mother fucker!
The fans are going wild as Batista roars in victory... before Zack Sabre, Jr. leaps onto his back, locking in a sleeper hold! Sabre tries to choke him out but Batista stomps toward the ropes, grabbing onto the top. Batista struggles to remain on his feet... until Danielson and London charge up behind Batista and dump him over the top rope to the floor!
[ Scott Steiner ] What the fuck!? NO! That's bullshit!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Like it or not, Dave Batista is GONE!
ELIMINATED - DAVE BATISTA
Sabre lands on the apron, looking down in awe as Batista tumbles to the floor! Before Danielson and London can do anything else, Steve Corino and Chris Jericho charge up behind them! They sidestep and Jericho and Corino collide with Sabre, sending him crashing into the guardrail and to the floor!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Steve Corino and Chris Jericho have seen to it that Zack Sabre, Jr.'s dream of winning the Golden Ticket will not come true on this night!
ELIMINATED - ZACK SABRE, JR.
Danielson and London both charge and nail Corino and Jericho with dropkicks as the timer begins counting down from ten once again!
#20 CHRISTOPHER DANIELS
The fans boo loudly as Christopher Daniels rushes to ringside and slides under the bottom rope. As soon as he enters the ring, he finds himself staring down Danielson and London! Daniels looks from side to side and tries to direct traffic, suggesting "it will take all of us to throw Corino's fat ass out of here, guys!" However, Danielson and London look at each other and then back at Daniels before hitting a double boot to the gut and delivering a double suplex! Daniels sits up, crying out in pain and Jimmy Havoc comes out of nowhere with a BASEMENT LARIAT! As soon as Havoc is up, he gets mugged by London and Danielson, who quickly toss him through the ropes to the floor!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Jimmy Havoc, sent to the floor!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Paul London and Bryan Danielson are working in tandem! What an unexpected thing, to witness the reunion of The Hybrid Dolphins right here in Solid Gold Wrestling!
[ Tony Schiavone ] It's a true WrestleBrawl moment!
Jericho and Corino are back up and assault Danielson and London from behind, pummeling them before tossing Danielson through the ropes to the floor! Corino whips London into the ropes and London comes back, ducking a clothesline! London leaps onto the middle rope and nails Corino with an ASAI MOONSAULT! London is right back up and Jericho comes out of nowhere with a JUDAS EFFECT but London ducks it and nails Jericho with a GERMAN SUPLEX! The fans pop huge as London climbs the ropes and flies... SHOOTING STAR PRESS ON JERICHO! The fans lose their minds and the timer... it begins to count down!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] When I first witnessed what Paul London could do in the ring, I thought he was one of the most impressive athletes I had ever seen! That still holds true to this day! What a phenomenal performer!
#21 KENNY OMEGA
Kenny Omega runs out from the back and slides into the ring to a big pop! He's met by Paul London and they trade forearms and chops like men possessed! Omega quickly takes over, whipping London into the ropes and nailing him with a V-TRIGGER! London falls into a seated position and Omega snatches up both of his wrists, smiling huge! He pulls London... INTO ANOTHER V-TRIGGER, RIGHT TO THE FACE! London is OUT!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Kenny Omega is making a statement!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Knees! To! Faces!
Steve Corino clubs Omega in the back but Omega stiffens up, shaking his head, slinging sweat in every direction! Omega slowly turns around and Corino begins to beg off but Omega boots him in the gut and points at the ropes! Omega charges and flings Corino over the top rope! Corino lands on the apron, hanging onto the ropes for dear life! Jimmy Havoc climbs onto the apron on the opposite side of the ring and Omega charges at him, nailing him with a BICYCLE KNEE off the apron! Omega goes to turn his attention back toward Corino but Danielson grabs Omega's ankles from the outside and drags him out of the ring before whipping him backward into the guardrail! Corino climbs back into the ring, relieved as the timer counts down once again!
#22 CHRIS DICKINSON
Chris Dickinson explodes out from the back and runs down to ringside! Danielson and Havoc meet him at the foot of the ramp and HE TURNS THEM BOTH INSIDE OUT WITH A FLYING DOUBLE LARIAT! Dicksin springs back to his feet, pounding his chest and shouting "THAT'S WHAT I'M TAWLKIN' ABOUT!" The fans are loudly chanting "DIRTY DADDY" over and over! Dickinson slides into the ring and immediately boots Steve Corino in the gut! FAT ASS PAZUZU BOMB! CORINO IS DEAD! Paul London charges at Dickinson but Dickinson ducks a clothesline attempt! London spins around and Dickinson catches him with a CLOTHESLINE OF HIS OWN! London goes over the top rope! Dickinson runs the length of the ropes with a clothesline but London ducks it... only to turn around and catch a SECOND CLOTHESLINE that sends him crashing to the floor!
[ Scott Steiner ] Hit the showers, you pale, flaccid little man!
[ Tony Schiavone ] You can't deny the power and charisma of Chris Dickinson!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] You know he's not just here for a Golden Ticket, gentlemen! What are the chances that the Dirty Daddy would be in the ring at the same time as The Fallen Angel!?
ELIMINATED - PAUL LONDON
Dickinson grabs the top rope and shakes it violently while sticking his tongue out as the fans go wild... AND THEN CHRISTOPHER DANIELS DUMPS DICKINSON TO THE FLOOR!
ELIMINATED - CHRIS DICKINSON
[ Tony Schiavone ] My word! Just like that!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He took his eyes off the ball for one second too long and that's all it takes!
As soon as Dickinson's elimination is registered, the timer starts up again!
#23 "THE FRANCHISE" SHANE DOUGLAS
"Perfect Strangers" by Deep Purple hits and the fans erupt in boos as Shane Douglas emerges from the back with the SGW Lifetime World Heavyweight Championship around his greasy waist! Douglas walks bowlegged down the ramp with a huge smile on his face. He climbs into the ring and immediately tries to revive Steve Corino, his Origin partner!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Look at this! Shane Douglas is looking to unify The Origin's efforts!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] There's only two members of The Origin in this match tonight... and they're in the ring at the same time, mostly in part to Steve Corino's freakish endurance! How has this man survived this long in the match!?
[ Scott Steiner ] Give it time! If somebody don't eliminate his fat ass soon, a heart attack will!
Corino staggers back to his feet and he and Douglas begin talking strategy! The fans are booing loudly as Corino and Douglas home in on Christopher Daniels and begin putting the boots to him! Daniels is out, in a seated position in the corner! Before they can finish him off, Daniels rolls under the bottom rope, looking out of it! Douglas and Corino look around and the ring and find that everyone still in the match are outside! Douglas and Corino exit through the ropes and begin going to work! They snatch up Jimmy Havoc and drop him chest first across the guardrail with a FLAPJACK SUPLEX! Bryan Danielson goes at them with a series of forearms and chops but Douglas completely no-sells it, screaming "YOU PASTY VEGAN FUCK!" before spitting on him and kicking him in the gut... PITTSBURGH PLUNGE ON THE FLOOR!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That's the move he used to defeat Cathy Kelley earlier tonight!
[ Scott Steiner ] Don't remind me of what that fuckin' idiot did to Cathy Kelley! He's still got a date with Big Poppa Pump comin' to him and I intend to stick that mother fucker with the bill!
Chris Jericho is lurking behind the ring steps, playing possum but Corino and Douglas pay him no mind anyway as they zone in on Kenny Omega and sling him under the bottom rope! They follow him inside but he rises to his feet and hits the ropes... BIG CLOTHESLINE ON DOUGLAS! Douglas falls against the ropes and drops to his knees! Corino and Omega trade blows until Omega takes over with a big knee lift to the mid-section! Omega begins vibrating, throwing his head back and forth... JAZZ HANDS! Omega hits the ropes and charges at Corino... but Douglas nails him with a LOW BLOW! SUPER KICK FROM CORINO! DOUGLAS AND CORINO DUMP OMEGA TO THE FLOOR!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] There goes Kenny Omega, courtesy of The Origin!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Steve Corino is playing the role of spoiler tonight!
ELIMINATED - KENNY OMEGA
Douglas and Corino high five and begin laughing, two fat sweaty old guys soaking in a chorus of deafening boos. The timer begins to tick down as our latest entrant is on his way!
Elias casually walks out from the back with a brand new guitar over his shoulder. The fans are cheering loudly as Elias makes his way down go the ring. He begins to place his guitar next to the ring steps but Chris Jericho emerges and attempts to attack him... ONLY TO HAVE THE GUITAR EXPLODED OVER HIS HEAD! Jericho goes down in a heap! Elias shakes his head, disappointed in Jericho... but then turns around just as... SHANE DOUGLAS GOES FOR A SUICIDE DIVE ON ELIAS BUT EATS THE ROPES! Douglas rag dolls on the middle rope, eats the apron with his face, and then SCORPIONS ON THE FLOOR BELOW! Elias just looks on in horror before shouting "ARE YOU OUTTA YOUR DAMN MIND, SON!?"
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Someone call an ambulance! Shane Douglas might be dead!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What a devastating fall!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I'm serious! He might be dead!
Elias slides under the bottom rope and is met by Steve Corino! Corino and Elias trade punches until Corino thumbs Elias in the eye! Elias covers his eye and staggers back as Corino shouts "YOU'RE GONNA GET IT NOW, KID! NOBODY DOES WHAT YOU JUST DID TO THE FRANCHISE AND GETS AWAY WITH IT!" In pain and holding his eye, Elias shouts back "ARE YOU SERIOUS!? DID YOU EVEN SEE WHAT HE TRIED TO DO!?" Corino charges at him with a running double axe handle but Elias boots him in the gut... DRIFT AWAY!
[ Scott Steiner ] I'm surprised he got that fucker up!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Elias is--
[ Scott Steiner ] HE'S FAT!
Elias rises back to his feet, all jacked up... but turns around into a boot to the gut from Christopher Daniels! Daniels has a huge smile on his face! He drags his thumb across his throat and hooks Elias for ANGEL'S WINGS! Daniels cries out "GET READY TO BE HUMILIATED ONE MORE TIME... BY GOOD OL' C.D.!" He tries to lift him up but Elias locks his legs... AND BACK DROPS DANIELS OVER THE TOP ROPE TO THE FLOOR! Elias stands upright and looks down at Daniels on the floor with a sly smirk, "never again, old friend," he says before turning his attention back to the match.
[ Tony Schiavone ] What a callback to their match at Fight to the Finish!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] A true turning point in Elias' SGW career and he just made it clear for anybody watching... there's no bloody going back! Thanks for coming, Christopher Daniels!
ELIMINATED - CHRISTOPHER DANIELS
The timer begins to count down!
#25 MATT RIDDLE
The fans immediately begin chanting "BRO! BRO! BRO!" over and over at Matt Riddle runs down to ringside! He slides under the bottom rope and meets Elias in the middle of the ring. Elias and Riddle stare each other down... but before they can make contact, Jimmy Havoc slides back into the ring and nails Riddle in the back with a big forearm! Riddle collides with Elias, knocking him backward into the ropes where he tumbles onto the apron to the floor! Riddle and Havoc trade blows before Riddle ducks a punch and nails Havoc with a roundhouse kick to the head! Havoc spins out and Riddle scoops him up... BRO 2 SLEEP!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Jimmy Havoc has endured unspeakable punishment tonight!
[ Tony Schiavone ] I'm surprised no one has exploited the injured hand of Jimmy Havoc!
Riddle springs back to his feet and drops to one knee, soaking in the cheers of the fans! Shane Douglas climbs back onto the apron with a bloody nose and Riddle charges at him, nailing him with a RUNNING KNEE STRIKE that sends Douglas back to the floor! Riddle turns around... INTO A SUPER KICK FROM CORINO! Riddle staggers back and falls into a seated position in the corner!
[ Scott Steiner ] How did fat ass Corino get his leg up that high!?
Corino smiles that crooked smile, showing off these even more crooked teeth... and walks right into a MISSILE DROPKICK FROM BRYAN DANIELSON! The fans pop huge! Danielson kips up and begins shaking his fist with intensity as... the timer counts down!
[ Scott Steiner ] Well, boys, time to fuck shit up!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Wait, what? Where are you going, Scott?
#26 "BIG POPPA PUMP" SCOTT STEINER
The fans explode as Scott Steiner stands up from behind the announce table and shreds off his casual attire to reveal his wrestling gear! Steiner removes his headset and places his chain mail on his head! Steiner climbs onto the apron and then removes the chain mail before stepping through the ropes! Steiner and Danielson go nose to nose as this heated rivalry is renewed! Danielson smiles evilly and takes a step back... before raising his middle finger and shouting "FUCK YOUUUUU!" However, before they can even touch, Chris Jericho comes out of nowhere and nails Steiner with a running forearm to the head!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Oh, big mistake, Chris Jericho!
Shane Douglas returns to the ring, looking visibly concussed, totally out of it, and nails Danielson in the back with a double axe handle, almost falling down as he does so. And then he does fall down and can barely push himself back up to all fours. Steiner and Jericho club away at each other before Steiner catches one of Jericho's overhand blows, grips him around the waist, and nails him with a BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX!
[ Tony Schiavone ] I told you so! Big mistake!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He's moving like he's in his prime!
Steiner does push-ups before standing back up and locking eyes with Shane Douglas! Douglas sobers up just enough that you can see the genuine fear in his eyes... as Steiner grabs him around the waist and THROWS HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE WITH AN OVERHEAD BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] HE'S DEAD! He's bloody dead for real this time!
ELIMINATED - SHANE DOUGLAS
The fans erupt as Steiner flexes and the timer begins to count down!
#27 ORANGE CASSIDY
Everyone turns to the entranceway, looking for Orange Cassidy but he never appears. Suddenly, Orange Cassidy casually rolls from underneath the ring with his hands in his pockets. He looks up at the WrestleBrawl match going on and casually shrugs his shoulders before rolling under the bottom rope and lethargically rising to his feet... coming face to face with the four-time former World Heavyweight Champion, Scott Steiner! Steiner stares Cassidy down before raising his arm up and flexing it hard, showing Cassidy how jacked he is... and then Cassidy slowly kicks Steiner in the leg!
[ Tony Schiavone ] This is gonna be bad.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] You ain't kiddin'.
[ Tony Schiavone ] To say that Orange Cassidy is an acquired taste would be an understatement... to say that Scott Steiner is going to take this lying down... well, that's an even bigger understatement. I'm scared for Orange Cassidy's health!
Steiner looks down at the point of impact... and Cassidy kicks Steiner's other leg!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Don't do it, Scott! Let the poor guy live!
Steiner looks around, dumbfounded... but before he can do anything about this level of disrespect, Bryan Danielson comes out of nowhere and dumps Steiner over the top rope to the floor! The fans erupt in boos as Danielson falls back into a seated position with a smile on his face!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Well, that's not exactly going to put Scott in a better mood, for sure.
[ Tony Schiavone ] Bryan Danielson just eliminated the four-time SGW World Heavyweight Champion! What a feather to stick in his cap going forward!
ELIMINATED - SCOTT STEINER
The fans barely have any time to breathe at all... before Steve Corino comes out of nowhere and dumps Orange Cassidy to the floor as well!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] The spoiler strikes again! Goodnight, Orange Cassidy!
ELIMINATED - ORANGE CASSIDY
Corino falls into a seated position against the ropes, laughing his ass off! The fans are booing loudly but they're attention is turned to the entranceway as the timer begins counting down again!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Steve Corino has certainly earned his pay day tonight! He intends to bring this home for The Origin and ensure that the Golden Ticket is used for the greater good!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] The Origin's greater good, you mean!
The fans don't know what to think as the Golden-Tron informs them that Alf is coming! However, it isn't the usual stuffed Alf doll, nor is it a regulation size, authentic Alf puppet from the show... it's a full-grown man wearing a mascot style Alf costume! Entering alongside him is Toni Storm and the Big Fat Booty Buddies! The fans suddenly begin booing and throwing tomatoes and heads of lettuce at what we're seeing, prompting Toni, Tenille, and Jordynne to abandon the elaborate entrance, leaving Alf to himself!
[ Scott Steiner ] Now, this is what I'm talkin' about! A good ol' fashioned eighties icon and some girls that got some faaaaaaat asses!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Welcome back, Scott!
[ Tony Schiavone ] He's back in the booth, folks! And we're absolutely not going to talk about his unceremonious exit from the WrestlBrawl match!
[ Scott Steiner ] What's that supposed to mean, bitch!?
[ Tony Schiavone ] We're not going to talk about it, I said!
[ Scott Steiner ] That's what I thought!
The man in the Alf costume makes his way up the ring steps and steps through the ropes, taking great care not to lose his head as he enters the ring. Once he's inside, he surveys his surroundings. Everyone is down with the exception of Danielson and Corino, who are in seated positions in opposite corners, watching this unfold... suddenly, Alf produces a microphone from out of nowhere and raises it to the oversized head's mouth.
[ Alf ] For those o' you who don't know me...
And then he rips the oversized head off and tosses it to the side, drawing intense heat!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Oh no! Son of a bitch!
[ Vince Russo ] MY NAME IS VINCE RUSSO... AND I AM THE ANTI-CHRIST OF SOLID GOLD WRESTLING!
The fans begin a startled "HOLY SHIT" chant before reverting back to booing Russo out of the building! Old, gray, and haggard, Russo continues jawing into the microphone as everyone looks on in confusion!
[ Vince Russo ] Thirteen fuckin' years ago, I seized control o' this company by turnin' Jeff Jarrett RIGHT HERE in this very fuckin' ring! WrestleBrawl 2, bay-bee! And I promised all o' you'se mutha' fucka's that NOTHIN' would eva' be the same again! And what happened?! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED!?
He looks around, genuinely wondering.
[ Vince Russo ] The company shut the fuck down and now here we are, thirteen years later and I gotta sneak in dressed up like mutha' fuckin' ALF TO GET IN THE FRONT DOOR!? WHERE'S THE RESPECT!? Well, fuck you! I ain't gonna take it anymore! I'm here to run this shit and put some respect back on my name and there ain't nobody that's gonna stop me this time!
Russo points out at nothing in particular with his big, brown furry mascot hand.
[ Vince Russo ] See, THIS... THIS RIGHT HERE... IS THE BEGINNIN' OF A REVOLUTION, BAY-BEE! It's time t' finish what I started when I sent Jeff Jarrett packin' all o' those years ago! Wrestlin' is dead! It's dead, ya' hear me!? I'm winnin' this fuckin' match and I'm usin' that Golden fuckin' Ticket to ERASE professional wrestlin'... and this shit is gonna be called SOLID GOLD TITTIES and when all o' you'se pieces o' shit are gathered up beneath me, just hopin' to drink some o' the wata' drippin' off my GENIUS BALLS, you'll be beggin' me for a spot on the biggest show o' the year, THICK ASSES 'N TITTIES BRAWL 4! It's gonna be Toni Storm and her fat ass friends for everybody, bitches!
The boos are so loud, they threaten to bring down the entire building!
[ Vince Russo ] AND ANOTHA' THING--
The glass shatters. The fans... they explode.
#29 "STONE COLD" STEVE AUSTIN
[ Tony Schiavone ] It's "Stone Cold" Steve Austin! The two time SGW World Heavyweight champion!
Steve Austin emerges from the back to a huge pop and stomps down the ramp on his way to the ring! The former two-time SGW World Heavyweight Champion rolls under the bottom rope and Russo tries to beg him off!
[ Vince Russo ] Steve! Steve, wait! Fuckin' hold on--
STONE COLD STUNNER ON VINCE RUSSO! The fans lose it! Austin yanks Russo back up to his feet and flings him over the top rope to the floor!
[ Scott Steiner ] Damn right! Take out the trash! Now bring those fat ass girls back out here!
ELIMINATED - VINCE RUSSO
Before Steve Austin can raise anymore hell, he's quickly mugged by Bryan Danielson and Steve Corino! They beat down on Austin, trying to stop his momentum but he boots Corino in the gut, sending him staggering back into the ropes! Danielson nails Austin with a huge chop to the chest and then goes for another but Austin ducks it and catches Danielson on the turnaround... KICK! WHAM! STUNNER!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That's his move! Danielson is down!
Chris Jericho finally returns to the ring and charges at Austin, nailing him with forearms until he's cornered him against the turnbuckles. Jericho stomps a mudhole in Austin and prepares to walk it dry before Matt Riddle returns to the match and nails Jericho in the back with a flying knee! He pulls Jericho out of the corner by his hair and scoops him up... BRO 2 SLEEP!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Chris Jericho is currently the iron man in this match and he has endured so much punishment! It's unheard of! How this man continues, I do not know!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Chris Jericho is a man who has experienced various versions of Solid Gold Wrestling... he's a man who has always been on the edge of greatness, of making history, but has never quite gotten there... it's apparent that Chris Jericho is using this opportunity to make a statement... to establish his name once and for all in the annals of Solid Gold Wrestling history!
Jericho rolls back out of the ring. Riddle walks to the ropes to gloat about how easy that was... and Jimmy Havoc comes out of nowhere to dump Matt Riddle out of the ring!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Matt Riddle! No!
[ Scott Steiner ] The King of Bros is fuckin' gone!
ELIMINATED - MATT RIDDLE
Jimmy Havoc immediately wheels around and stares Austin down, motioning for him to bring it on! Austin pulls himself up out of the corner and glares at Havoc. They meet in the center of the ring as the fans begin buzzing with anticipation, wondering what's going to happen when these two start throwing hands... and without warning, Austin nails Havoc with a big right hand! Havoc comes back with a punch of his own but Austin no-sells it, peppers Havoc with lefts and rights, and knocks him down into a seated position in the corner! Austin stomps a mudhole in Havoc and walks it dry... until STEVE CORINO COMES OUT OF NOWHERE AND DUMPS AUSTIN TO THE FLOOR!
[ Tony Schiavone ] You must be joking! Steve Corino again!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] The bloody spoiler!
ELIMINATED - STEVE AUSTIN
The fans ERUPT in boos as Corino celebrates like he just won the entire thing! Everyone turns their attention to the Golden-Tron as the timer counts down for the final time tonight!
PAC walks out from the back, dripping wet and scowling down at the ring. He makes his way down and climbs up the steps, keeping his eyes locked on everyone he can physically see in and around the ring. PAC steps through the ropes and Corino charges at him, throwing a SUPER KICK in his direction but PAC ducks it and TRASH CANS CORINO TO THE FLOOR WITH NO EFFORT!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] And just like that, Steve Corino is gone! PAC has done it!
[ Tony Schiavone ] And the fans are thankful! The Origin will not receive a Golden Ticket on this night!
ELIMINATED - STEVE CORINO
The fans pop huge as Corino lands in a heap on the floor and looks on in shock! PAC immediately turns his attention to Jimmy Havoc, snatching him out of the corner and drilling him with a BRAINBUSTER! PAC steps through the ropes and climbs to the top turnbuckle... BLACK ARROW ON JIMMY HAVOC!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Good lord! Just stay down, Jimmy!
[ Scott Steiner ] Every bone in his tiny, frail little body must be fuckin' gravel by now!
As soon as PAC returns to his feet, Elias slides back into the ring and whips PAC around! He goes for DRIFT AWAY but PAC spins out of it and drills Elias with a SPIKE DDT! Elias stands on the top of his head for a full two or three seconds before tumbling over like a falling tree! PAC kips back up and finds himself face to face with Bryan Danielson! PAC and Danielson go nose to nose until PAC headbutts Danielson right in the face! Danielson staggers back and PAC hits the ropes, drilling Danielson with a RUNNING DROPKICK TO THE FACE! Danielson tumbles through the ropes to the floor!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Jesus!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What a dropkick!
Chris Jericho slides back into the ring and attacks PAC from behind, knocking him down to one knee. Jericho clubs away at him, hitting him across the shoulders and back of the head. With PAC down to one knee, Jericho runs the ropes... but PAC rises and follows him in, catching him on the turnaround with a KITCHEN SINK! Jericho flips over PAC's knee and lands in a seated position! PAC rests his hand on the top rope, looking down at Jericho and pointing at him, ready to finish him off... but Steve Corino climbs onto the apron and grabs PAC by the wrist, holding him in place! The fans boo loudly as Corino hops off the apron, maintaining his grip on PAC, almost pulling him over the top rope on his own... but Chris Jericho charges up behind him and DUMPS HIM TO THE FLOOR!
[ Tony Schiavone ] No! Not like that!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Even eliminated, Steve Corino continues to spoil the match!
ELIMINATED - PAC
The fans boo loudly as PAC and Corino brawl up the ramp and toward the back as the match continues in the ring!
[ Tony Schiavone ] PAC and Steve Corino, going at it like wild animals!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Get Steve Corino away from the damn ring!
Jericho is the only man standing in the ring, dropping to one knee with his fist raised in the air. The fans cheer loudly as Elias climbs onto the apron and steps through the ropes, eyeing Jericho hungrily. Elias approaches and Jericho whips around, staring him down. Elias and Jericho look at each other and then out at the fans, who begin cheering loudly, excited at the prospect of these two having a match against one another... but then Jericho sucker punches Elias in the throat! Jericho grabs a handful of Elias' hair and guides him toward the ropes, attempting to force him over. Elias hangs onto the ropes, refusing to cooperate.
[ Tony Schiavone ] They're doing everything they can to eliminate The Drifter!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Elias did not survive the Ring of Fire so that he could be eliminated so easily!
Bryan Danielson slides back under the bottom rope and charges, nailing Jericho in the back and then trying to dump HIM over the top rope to the floor! Danielson struggles, trying to force Jericho over the top! Elias regains his footing and boots Jericho in the side before helping Danielson force him over. They're tangled in the ropes, struggling, grunting, fighting with everything they have... and Jimmy Havoc returns to the ring and charges full speed into the mass of humanity, dumping all three of them over the top rope! The fans can't believe it! Elias and Jericho tumble to the floor but Bryan Danielson manages to hang on!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Elias and Jericho! Elias and Jericho! They're gone!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] And Danielson remains! Only Bryan Danielson remains!
ELIMINATED - ELIAS & CHRIS JERICHO
Bryan Danielson hangs onto the top rope! Havoc throws a punch and Danielson blocks it before nailing Havoc with a big right hand! Havod staggers out into the center of the ring and Danielson leaps onto the top rope... SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK! Havoc goes down hard and Danielson kips up, shaking his fists and gritting his teeth! Havoc rolls over onto all fours and Danielson approaches him... BEFORE STOMPING ON THE DAMAGED HAND OF JIMMY HAVOC! Havoc cries out in pain as Danielson grinds his foot on Havoc's broken hand! Havoc finally wrenches his hand free and rolls under the bottom rope, holding it tightly to his chest. As he staggers around ringside, Danielson flies through the ropes, wiping Havoc out with a SUICIDE DIVE!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Bryan Danielson is pulling out all the stops!
[ Scott Steiner ] Bryan Danielson and Jimmy Havoc, fightin' for all the fuckin' marbles! What a disgrace! Total combined weight is like two hundred fuckin' pounds! There was more beef in the ring during Barbie Blank's match!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Bryan Danielson is ruthlessly attacking the injured hand of Jimmy Havoc!
Danielson quickly returns to his feet and slings Havoc under the bottom rope before sliding in behind him. Danielson remains on all fours, staring Havoc down as he struggles to roll over on his side. Danielson drools everywhere as he shouts "GET UP, JIMMY! GET UP!" Jimmy forces himself up to his knees and Danielson rises to his feet. Danielson drills Havoc with kick after brutal kick to the chest! Havoc looks up at Danielson and flips him off... before Danielson kicks his head clean off his shoulders! Havoc goes down, limp!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] What a shot! Broken hand be damned, Havoc has to be out!
Danielson grabs Havoc by either side of his head and tries to drag him toward the ropes. Havoc fights back, punching and elbowing at Danielson's mid-section. Havoc struggles back to his feet and Danielson takes hold of his hair before drilling him with a forearm that nearly makes Havoc weak in the knees! Havoc fires back with a forearm of his own! They exchange forearms repeatedly until Danielson sneers and throws a haymaker! Havoc ducks it, catches Danielson by the wrist, and goes for the ACID RAINMAKER... but Danielson ducks it, executes a go-behind... and DRILLS HAVOC WITH A RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX! The momentum sends Havoc rolling back to his feet! He staggers backward into the ropes and Danielson charges... CLOTHESLINING BOTH MEN OVER THE TOP ROPE!
[ Tony Schiavone ] OH MY GOODNESS! THEY'RE BOTH OUT!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] No! They're hangin' on by a bloody thread!
Danielson and Havoc both hang onto the top rope, their feet only inches from the floor! They hang freely and kick away at one another, trying to force the other to let go! Danielson and Havoc keep kicking away, struggling to maintain their grips... until Danielson pulls himself up and uses the momentum to kick further... to kick higher... INTO HAVOC'S INJURED HAND! Havoc lets go and tumbles to the floor!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] We have a winna'!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Bryan Danielson has done it!
[ Scott Steiner ] NO GOD DAMN WAY!
- WINNER & NEW GOLDEN TICKET HOLDER -
Havoc sits with his back to the guardrail, clutching his injured hand to his chest and staring up at Danielson with genuine disappointment on his face. Danielson sits on the apron and glares right back at Havoc, a surprised smile stretched across his features. Danielson raises a middle finger to Havoc and rolls back into the ring, celebrating as Aubrey Edwards brings the Golden Ticket into the ring!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Bryan Danielson has gone through hell to become the winner of the WrestleBrawl match... joining elite company with Jeff Jarrett and Raven as the only three men in SGW history to do so... however, Bryan Danielson will be the first of those three men to receive the Golden Ticket! What will he use it for?!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I wish I could say for certain, Tony... but with Danielson's erratic behavor of late, I have no idea.
[ Scott Steiner ] Who cares what he cashes it in for? He can't use it to increase his fuckin' skill or add on two hundred pounds of muscle so what's the point!? Cash it in for a title shot and lose, bitch! Or use it to make sure there ain't no meat served in catering, you vegan pussy! This is the worst WrestleBrawl ever!
[ Tony Schiavone ] How devastated must Jimmy Havoc be? To come so close but have his downfall be the result of damage inflicted by his own drive to succeed? He came into this match with a broken hand... he fought with heart and honor but in the end, it was Bryan Danielson who walks away with the victory!
Danielson looks down at the ticket and then out at the fans, grinning evilly. He holds the ticket over his head and shouts "ANYTHING... I... WANT!" Danielson goes corner to corner, raising a fist in the air with the ticket held tightly to his chest. Danielson climbs out of the ring and backs up the ramp, smiling. He reaches the stage and holds the ticket over his head once again before pointing at himself and shouting... "BEST... WRESTLER... IN... THE... WORRRRRRLD!"
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Congratulations, Bryan... this is your night!
The camera zooms in on the smiling, victorious Danielson and his Golden Ticket before we fade to black.
aint neva' seen no one like me
#RoleModel #richandfed #LegitBoss #yourewelcome
We quickly go backstage where we see Barbie Blank hanging out in her underwear with a giant bandage on her head, covering up the battle wound inflicted by Hana Kimura earlier tonight. Barbie is holding a bottle of wine in her hand and it's obviously not her first as she's hopelessly sloshed. She staggers toward someone lurking in the shadows.
[ Barbie Blank ] Wow, I... I wash all wrong about you...
She falls into the man's arms. We can tell the man is short but his face is obscured by darkness. Barbie looks up into his eyes. She slurs her words horribly. An absolute embarrassment.
[ Barbie Blank ] You're rich ash fuck and you know how t' party.
She laughs and drools all over herself.
[ Barbie Blank ] Dude... the doc gave me shum groovy pain pillsh.
The man strokes her hair.
[ Barbie Blank ] I should get shtabbed in the head... more often!
We hear the man's voice and it's immediately familiar to us. We've already heard it tonight.
[ Mystery Man ] You know, I may sound crazy since we just met and all... but... I think...
The man's face is slowly illuminated... and we see his identity.
[ Tom Cruise ] I think I love you.
He smiles, showing off his pearly whites. There's a twinkle as they shine in the light.
[ Tom Cruise ] ...I love you.
Barbie's eyes widen with surprise. She tries to push away.
[ Barbie Blank ] Whoa, that's kinda' heavy--
Cruise grabs her by either side of her face, holding it close to his own.
[ Tom Cruise ] You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen.
[ Barbie Blank ] Obvioushly... but--
[ Tom Cruise ] And now that I am the one true holder... of real... ultimate... power...
He shakes his head, smiling.
[ Tom Cruise ] Not even the most beautiful woman in the world can tell me no.
She suddenly heaves and vomits all over his chest. Tom Cruise looks down at the mess and takes a deep breath. He removes his aviator shades and looks her dead in the eyes. He forces the words past gritted teeth.
[ Tom Cruise ] I love you, Barbie Blank.
And then he kisses her on her pukey mouth. The fans gag in unison.
[ Tom Cruise ] Despite your very few... yet very glaring flaws.
She tips forward, almost passing out. The side of her face rests in the vomit on his chest.
[ Tom Cruise ] Ride off into the sunset with me, babe. Let's live happily ever after.
There's a sickening "gluck" sound as he uses his hands to remove her face from his ruined chest. He looks her in the eyes and she absentmindedly nods. There's obviously no one home.
[ Tom Cruise ] Marry me.
The fans gasp, having no idea where this is coming from.
[ Tom Cruise ] Saturday, June 13th, 2020... in Orlando, Florida!
He holds her head tightly between his hands, so tightly that her head threatens to pop.
[ Tom Cruise ] Supremacy! Live on pay-per-view!
Her eyelids flutter and her bandage comes undone, allowing some blood to escape the wound and run down the center of her forehead, dripping off her nose and onto Tom's shirt.
[ Barbie Blank ] lol okay
She immediately passes out against him and he scoops her up, holding her in his arms.
[ Tom Cruise ] I'm in love.
His smile gets impossibly larger and he cries out at the top of his lungs.
[ Tom Cruise ] I'M IN LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
He walks off-camera, carrying her away. The camera pans over to reveal Candy Floss, Tucor, and Kris Statlander watching this with wide eyes. The fans cheer but those cheers quickly plateau into genuine concern. Floss gestures toward what we just witnessed.
[ Candy Floss ] What... wait... I don't... what happened t' power... and- and... responsibility? Did he just use the real ultimate powa' that we risked our lives for... t' woo, quite possibly the worst human being eva' born? I know I didn't just see that.
Tucor tilts his head to the side, confused. Statlander is trembling with rage and confusion. She places her hands on either side of her head... she can't contain it anymore.
[ Kris Statlander ] ...WHAT THE FU-
bell rings and the very obvious size differential between the two
competitors vying for the Solid Gold Wrestling Elevation
Championship is a textbook first note to be made.
- WINNER & NEW CHAMPION -
Scott Steiner ]
LET ME BE THE FIRST TO SAY IT – NUNZIO’S ASS DIDN’T QUIT, AND HE
THREW EVERY SHOT HE COULD – BUT STILL KEVIN NASH BEAT HIS STUPID
ASS! AND NOW – BIG SEXY’S GOT THE ELEVATION CHAMPIONSHIP!
skyline is illuminated beautifully as we take an exterior shot of
the Rogers Centre, home to WrestleBrawl 3!
We fade up backstage where we see Jinny walking toward the gorilla position, in her gear and entrance waist-cape. She holds the SGW Women's World Championship over her shoulder. She's staring straight ahead with her nose up in the air, obviously better than anyone and everyone in the immediate vicinity. Behind her, Aliyah and Vanessa Borne follow, dressed to the nines. The scheduled death match for the championship is only moments away... but Jinny comes to a sudden stop. Vanessa and Aliyah look momentarily confused. Jinny raises her hand in the air, waving them off rudely. Her voice is cold... but confident.
[ Jinny ] Leave, bitches.
Aliyah and Vanessa look at each other, eyebrows raised. Jinny's eyes narrow.
[ Jinny ] This victory shall be mine... and mine alone.
Without another word, Jinny glides forward, leaving Aliyah and Vanessa standing alone. The live crowd is booing as Jinny disappears off-camera. Aliyah places her hand on her hip and smiles as we head to the ring.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] At Mile High Madness, Christina Von Eerie became the first-ever SGW Women's World Champion when she defeated eight other women in the Gold Rush match... it was only a few months later that she had that championship stolen from her by the debuting Jinny at Card Subject to Change... their rivalry has not been a long one by any stretch, gentlemen... but it has been heated... it has been deeply personal... and what we're about to witness in this ring tonight, in front of the largest audience in SGW history... well...
[ Scott Steiner ] There's gonna be fuckin' blood.
We hear Nigel take a deep breath.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Scotty... you aren't kidding.
"Broken Bones" by Anti-Flag hits and the fans erupt in cheers! The camera focuses on the entranceway and Christina Von Eerie appears from behind the curtain in torn up jeans, a shredded Misfits t-shirt, and a studded leather vest. In her right hand, she drags a steel chair wrapped in barbwire behind her.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] And here... she... IS!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Christina Von Eerie returned at Heartbreaker and since then, she has been on a roaring rampage of revenge! With few exceptions, she has isolated herself from the rest of the SGW locker room and set her sights one hundred percent on recapturing the gold she lost to the nefarious, underhanded Jinny and her House of the Highers!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Christina Von Eerie has every right to be upset about how she was cost the championship. She had no clue who she was stepping into the ring with that night... and had she been left alone with Jinny, perhaps we would be telling a different story right now... but she wasn't! She had to take on Aliyah and Vanessa Borne as well, and as expected, that treacherous trio proved t' be too much for the Ultra Violent Punk Rock Princess to handle!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Von Eerie has been a trailblazer since coming to SGW. At Mile High Madness, she became the first ever SGW Women's World Champion... at the end of 2019, not only was she was the number two ranked competitor on the SGW Top 40 but she was named the 2019 Female Competitor of the Year! Her reputation and her credentials speak for themselves!
Once Von Eerie reaches the ringside area, she slings the chair over the top rope and into the ring. She rolls under the bottom rope and looks out at the fans, a dead serious look on her face. The fans are loudly chanting "OI! OI! OI!" in support of the history making, first-ever women's champion. She nods and places her hands on her hips, stoic, before tossing her vest outside the ring and taking a place in the corner, facing the entranceway. Rick Knox stands to the side, looking ready for action and wearing padded gloves, anticipating where this match is going.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] She's ready... she's ready t' go t' war, gentlemen, and take a look at Rick Knox. This is a man who has seen some things. Neva' forget, he was the man who refereed the brutal Mile High Street Fight between Matt Sydal and "Mr. Sadistic" Luke Harpa'...
Von Eerie's music cuts and there's a lull in crowd noise as the fans anticipate what's coming next. "Trap or Treat" hits and the fans erupt in boos. There's a long moment where nothing happens and the boos become even louder... until Jinny steps through the curtain with the SGW Women's World Championship held over her shoulder. She glares down the ramp at the ringside area, wearing a leather mask reminiscent of the one her trainer, Jimmy Havoc, wears.
Jinny stands on the stage and drops her waist-cape. She tilts her head back, staring down her nose at the ringside area with brooding intensity. She reaches up and unfastens the mask, dropping it to the stage as well. A small collective of fans near the front begin chanting "JINNY! JINNY! JINNY FUCKING HAVOC!" but the rest of the crowd doesn't join in.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Look at that face! If Christina Von Eerie was lookin' for a war, Jinny looks as though she intends to bloody give 'er one!
[ Scott Steiner ] I don't know if my god damn stomach is ready for this! Neither one of these broads looks like they're gonna hold shit back!
Jinny walks confidently down the ramp, her eyes never leaving the ring... but that doesn't do her any good as, as soon as she gets close enough to the ring, Christina Von Eerie flies through the ropes and wipes her out with a suicide dive to a massive pop! Christina Von Eerie springs back to her feet, breathing heavily, running on pure adrenaline and hatred! Von Eerie looks down at Jinny and then picks up the women's championship, staring down into the center plate as Rick Knox leaps out of the ring and calls for the bell!
Von Eerie snatches Jinny up by two handfuls of hair and immediately throws her onto a plywood board wrapped in barbwire! Jinny begins shrieking loudly as she tries to pull herself out of the barbwire but it clings to her gear, tearing her flesh! Rick Knox tries to help her but Von Eerie shoves him aside and grabs Jinny by the hair again, dragging her out, almost against her will as the barbwire is reluctant to let her go!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Christina Von Eerie isn't wasting any time!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This is not going t' be a match for the weak of heart!
Jinny is bleeding out of several wounds on her arms and the backs of her legs as Von Eerie drags her around the ringside area by her hair. Jinny is grimacing, gasping, and cursing as Von Eerie leads her around the ring. Von Eerie finally stops in front of another large plywood board wrapped in barbwire. Von Eerie pulls her in and hooks her for a suplex but Jinny locks her legs and refuses to go with it. Von Eerie pounds her in the back until Jinny goes down to one knee. Von Eerie lets go of the hold and knees Jinny right in the face, knocking her flat on her back! Without wasting another second, Von Eerie grabs one of the cloth sacks and unties it, dumping thousands of THUMB TACKS onto the plywood board! The fans gasp and then begin cheering loudly!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Oh my! No! This early!?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I'm thinking Jinny is about t' wish she took the suplex the first time!
Von Eerie snatches Jinny up and pulls her in... for a PILEDRIVER! But Jinny fights it, kicking her legs erratically to throw Von Eerie off! Von Eerie pounds Jinny in the back again but this time Jinny shifts her position to switch places with Von Eerie... and BACKDROPS HER INTO THE BARBWIRE AND TACKS! Christina Von Eerie screams in pain as hundreds of tacks find their way into her back and legs while the barbwire rips and tears at her flesh!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY, STOP IT!
Jinny staggers forward, panting, looking genuinely fearful for a moment before looking over her shoulder and seeing Von Eerie in pain. A sinister smile creeps across Jinny's face and she dives for the ring apron, throwing up the skirt and finding a bundle of light tubes! Jinny holds it in front of her like a baseball bat, getting a feel for it. Rick Knox is using snips to cut Von Eerie free from the barbwire. She frantically yanks the barbwire out of her skin and brushes the tack away, leaving specks of blood up and down her arms. Von Eerie seems genuinely concerned with her physical condition until she sees Jinny charging at her! Von Eerie's eyes go wide and she shoves Rick Knox out of the way... as JINNY SWINGS THE LIGHT TUBE BUNDLE! Von Eerie catches Jinny's wrists and boots her in the stomach before wrenching the light tubes out of her hands! Jinny is doubled over and Von Eerie EXPLODES the light tubes across Jinny's back!
[ Scott Steiner ] God damn! She's gonna kill this bitch!
Jinny goes down to her knees, crying out in pain! Jinny's back is covered in blood and phosphor as Von Eerie grabs her by the hair and pulls her back to her feet. Von Eerie plants Jinny on the floor with a snap suplex and then returns to her feet, pointing down at Jinny. The fans are buzzing with anticipation and a sadistic smile appears on Von Eerie's face. She positions one of the tables at ringside and the fans begin loudly chanting "WE WANT TABLES" over and over. Von Eerie painstakingly lifts up one of the barbwire wrapped sheets of plywood and places that on top of the table. Jinny slowly gets up to all fours. Von Eerie approaches her and Jinny nails her in the stomach with a forearm before rising to one knee, nailing her with a second forearm. Jinny is up and drills Von Eerie in the side of the head with a series of forearms, rattling her, before throwing her under the bottom rope. Jinny looks down at her bloody hands and slides a chair under the bottom rope before finding another cloth sack and tossing it into the ring as well.
[ Tony Schiavone ] They're finally taking it inside!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] But what does that mean when there's just as many dangerous toys in the ring as there is out of it, Tony!? This nightmare is far from ova' for these ladies!
As soon as Jinny enters the ring and gets to her feet, Christina Von Eerie charges at her full speed with a steel chair wrapped in barbwire! Jinny ducks out of the way as Von Eerie swings, the momentum causing her to lose her grip on the chair, sending it sailing out of the ring and narrowly missing Rick Knox, who turns pale upon realizing how close he came to dying! Von Eerie doesn't even care, whipping around to face Jinny and throwing a right hand! Jinny takes it on the chin and nails Von Eerie with one of her own! They trade punches until Jinny blocks one of Von Eerie's punches, catches her wrist... and NAILS HER WITH THE ACID RAINMAKER! The impact turns Von Eerie inside out!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Goodness gracious! THAT'S HER MOVE!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This could be a short yet violent night for the champion!
Jinny falls on Von Eerie and hooks her leg! Rick Knox slides into position! One! Two! Thr-- VON EERIE KICKS OUT! Jinny clenches her fists and shrieks in rage before standing up and grabbing the steel chair she slid into the ring. Von Eerie isn't in great shape, clearly out of it. She pushes herself up onto all fours and Jinny motions for her to get up, clutching the chair. Von Eerie gets up to her knees and looks Jinny dead in the eye before raising two middle fingers! Jinny swings... and KNOCKS VON EERIE'S HEAD OFF HER SHOULDERS! The fans boo loudly! Jinny slings the chair to the side and falls onto Von Eerie again! She plants her forearm across Von Eerie's jaw, disrespecting her with a cocky pin! One! Two! Thre-- VON EERIE KICKS OUT AGAIN!
[ Scott Steiner ] Their ain't no god damn way! She scrambled her fuckin' brains!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Christina Von Eerie has not come this far to leave without the championship!
[ Tony Schiavone ] HER championship, Nigel! That title belongs to Christina Von Eerie!
Jinny sits up and grabs two handfuls of her own hair, refusing to believe that Von Eerie won't stay down! Jinny stands up and looks around the ring before her eyes settle on the sack she tossed into the ring. She picks it up and unties the string, not bothering to look inside before she pours out... SHARDS OF BROKEN GLASS!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Oh. Oh no.
[ Scott Steiner ] Man, fuck this.
Jinny looks down at the sparkling mess in front of her with wide eyes. "Fuck!" she says, realizing she's brought this into play. She shuts her eyes for a moment and then takes a deep breath before wandering over to take Von Eerie by a handful of hair. Von Eerie barely gets up to her feet before Jinny begins guiding her toward the pile of broken glass. Jinny takes Von Eerie by the wrist, getting right in her face and shouting "This is it, bitch! It's the end for you!" ACID RAINMAKERRRRR! NO! VON EERIE DUCKS THE CLOTHESLINE! Von Eerie whips Jinny around... BOOT TO THE STOMACH... GRAVEYARD SMASH INTO THE GLASS!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] OH! MY! GOODNESS!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That has to be it! I hope to GOD that's it!
Von Eerie rolls Jinny over and covers her, too beat up to be concerned with hooking a leg! One! Two! Thre-- JINNY GETS A SHOULDER UP! The fans boo loudly! Jinny's face is bleeding from a dozen tiny cuts. Her eyes flutter as she's visibly knocked loopy. Von Eerie remains on her knees, looking down at Jinny. Von Eerie looks around the ring and slowly stands up, staggering a bit as she wanders toward the ropes. Von Eerie climbs out of the ring and slides a table under the bottom rope. She tosses the ring skirt up and finds... sheets of construction paper!? Von Eerie smiles and rolls under the bottom rope.
[ Scott Steiner ] What's she gonna do with fuckin' paper!?
Von Eerie holds up one of the sheets of paper and walks over to Jinny. Jinny is visibly trembling with pain and trauma. Von Eerie pulls her up into a seated position and grabs Jinny's hand. Jinny realizes what's happening and tries to fight her off but Von Eerie elbows Jinny on top of the head... and BEGINS PAPER CUTTING HER BETWEEN HER FINGERS!
[ Scott Steiner ] I'm gonna be fuckin' sick!
Jinny cries out in pain and struggles to get free as Von Eerie goes to work! Jinny finally manages to reposition herself and kick Von Eerie away before looking down at her hands in horror! Jinny scrambles back to her feet and Von Eerie charges at her with a clothesline... but Jinny ducks it and catches Von Eerie on the turnaround with a CAPO KICK! Von Eerie goes down to one knee and Jinny backs into the ropes, using the momentum to dropkick Von Eerie right in the face! Von Eerie goes down and Jinny stares down at her, seething with anger. She picks up the discarded paper and pulls Von Eerie up into a seated position now. Von Eerie comes to just enough to struggle but it's too late! JINNY PAPER CUTS VON EERIE BETWEEN THE FINGERS! Von Eerie fights back up to her feet and Jinny immediately cuts her off with a BRUTAL CUNT PUNT! Von Eerie goes down to her knees and Jinny wastes no time positioning the paper against Von Eerie's open mouth.... and PAPER CUTS THE CORNERS OF HER MOUTH!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Just when ya' think it can't get any worse, gentlemen!
[ Tony Schiavone ] I'm very uncomfortable watching this!
[ Scott Steiner ] How does this shit even cross somebody's mind t' do, huh!? If Gangrel did this shit to me back in the day, I woulda' come back and I woulda' killed that fat, stupid bastard! There's just some shit ya' don't do to another man and we're lookin' at that shit right now! This is outlaw bullshit!
Jinny discard the paper and looks down at Von Eerie. Von Eerie remains on her knees and throws up a middle finger, right in Jinny's face. Jinny grabs Von Eerie by the wrist and attempts to pull her up but Von Eerie punches her in the stomach before rattling off a series of forearms to the mid-section that cause Jinny to stagger back and away. Von Eerie slowly returns to her feet and Jinny charges at her, drilling her with a big forearm to the head! Von Eerie and Jinny trade vicious forearms as the fans "BOO/YAY" over and over! Von Eerie takes over with a headbutt to the face and Jinny staggers back into the ropes! Von Eerie catches her on the rebound, going for a big haymaker but Jinny ducks it! Von Eerie turns around and Jinny catches her with a HEADBUTT of her own! Von Eerie goes down to one knee and Jinny kicks her in the face, knocking her down! Jinny sets her sights on the table that Von Eerie slid into the ring earlier. She tries setting it up but as trouble getting the legs underneath it. Jinny looks at Rick Knox and points at the table, "HELP ME, YOU BALD CUNT!" Knox leaps into action, helping Jinny set up the table!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Jinny is looking to end this one, finally!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] It's too late! The damage has already been done! Neither of these women will ever be the same again after this match!
[ Scott Steiner ] I ain't never gonna be the same again after seein' this shit!
Jinny turns around to retrieve Von Eerie but Von Eerie is already waiting on her, nailing her in the stomach with a stiff kick! Jinny doubles over and Von Eerie brings her in for a POWER BOMB but before she plants her, she looks down around the ring and lets Jinny fall by the wayside. Von Eerie grabs another sack from the ringside area and rolls back into the ring. She unties it and slings the contents onto the table... THUMB TACKS! Von Eerie grabs Jinny by her hair and Jinny struggles to get free... but Von Eerie isn't having it! She headbutts Jinny right in the face and pulls her in... AND POWERBOMBS HER THROUGH THE THUMBTACK COVERED TABLE!
[ Tony Schiavone ] THIS IS IT!
Von Eerie covers! ONE! TWO! THRE-- VON EERIE PULLS JINNY UP! Von Eerie shakes her head! The fans are confused! Von Eerie isn't finished! She pulls Jinny's lifeless body out of the wreckage and drags her toward the ring apron. The table is still set up at ringside with the barbwire wrapped plywood on top of it! Von Eerie pulls Jinny up to her knees and positions her head between her legs.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] By God, she's going to powerbomb her off the apron into the bloody barbwire!
But then Von Eerie's eyes settle on the corner and she lets Jinny go for a moment. Von Eerie points at the corner and the fans begin buzzing with anticipation! Von Eerie drags Jinny toward the corner and deadlifts her into a seated position on the top rope! Von Eerie climbs up behind her and hooks her...
[ Nigel McGuinness ] A SUPERPLEX!? ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?
[ Tony Schiavone ] Someone has to stop this! Someone could be seriously hurt!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This has gone way too far!
Von Eerie prepares to superplex Jinny off the top to the outside, through the barbwire plywood... but the fans suddenly cheer as Rhea Ripley runs down the ramp at full speed and leaps onto the apron. Von Eerie looks down from the top, seeing Ripley blocking her trajectory to the table! Rhea looks up at her, a look of concern on her face, though she doesn't say anything.
[ Tony Schiavone ] Thank God for Rhea Ripley! Here to talk some sense into Christina Von Eerie!
But Ripley suddenly springs into action, hooks Von Eerie... AND POWERBOMBS HER OFF THE APRON THROUGH THE BARBWIRE TABLE AT RINGSIDE! The fans erupt in boos as Ripley stands on the apron and looks down at Von Eerie's broken body. Ripley runs her hands through her hair and hops off the apron before walking to the back without saying a word! Von Eerie is accordioned on the floor, tangled up in the barbwire, completely unconscious. Jinny is slumped over the top turnbuckles, barely moving.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Why, Rhea, why!? Heaven's sake!
[ Tony Schiavone ] They're both dead. Just call it, Rick Knox. It's over.
Jinny tumbles off the top turnbuckle and onto the apron. She rolls off onto the floor and crawls on all fours toward the wreckage containing the body of Christina Von Eerie. The fans boo loudly as Jinny crawls on top of Von Eerie. Rick Knox shakes his head, just looking disappointed. He slowly drops to his knees and counts... one. two. three.
- WINNER & STILL CHAMPION -
The fans erupt in boos as "Trap or Treat" hits. Aliyah and Vanessa Borne charge out from the back and swarm Jinny, fanning her and wiping at her face, trying to clean her up. Jinny is completely out of it. EMTs and road agents charge out from the back to check on both women.
[ Tony Schiavone ] What a war. What a war, guys.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I'm honestly speechless.
[ Scott Steiner ] I don't never wanna see nothin' like that in an SGW ring ever fuckin' again.
EMTs help Jinny to her feet and she's assisted to the back by Aliyah and Borne. Somewhere in the chaos, Rick Knox managed to hand Jinny her championship belt and she stops on the stage with the Highers, who wheel her around so that she can look out at the fans, covered in blood and phosphor. Jinny raises the championship over her head, trembling. Though she's victorious, there's no sign of joy on her face. Only the look of a woman who has been to hell and back tonight. The Highers escort her through the curtain.
[ Tony Schiavone ] You don't have to like it... but learn to live with it. Jinny is the champion.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Thanks to Rhea Ripley, of all people. What was she thinking?
[ Scott Steiner ] I'm sure the moose has her reasons... whatever the fuck they might be.
The EMTs try to strap Von Eerie to a stretcher but she pushes them away, struggling to move about on her own. Von Eerie actually crawls on all fours until she gets halfway up the ramp and collapses. Luster the Legend and Adam Thornstowe emerge from the back and check on her. The EMTs insist on looking at her again but Luster stands up, blocking their access to Von Eerie. Thornstowe helps Von Eerie up to her feet and throws her arm over his shoulder. The fans give Von Eerie a standing ovation as Reno SCUM helps her to the back.
we begin on a tight shot of the Solid Gold Wrestling Elevation
Championship, and upon zooming out, we see it is resting on the
shoulder of the new champion, “Big Sexy” Kevin Nash.
inside the area is electric. The fans are all on their feet because
they know what’s coming next. Nigel McGuinness, Tony Schiavone, and
Scott Steiner greet us one final time.
We head to ringside where we see Justin Roberts standing in the middle of the ring. Aubrey Edwards stands in the corner, hands clasped behind her back with a stoic look upon her face. The fans are all on their feet, buzzing with anticipation. This is the moment they've all been waiting for. Justin Roberts raises the microphone and begins to speak.
[ Justin Roberts ] Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is set for one fall... and it is for the SGW WORRRRRRRRRRRRLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIPPPPPPPPP!
"Glory Days" by Bruce Springsteen hits as the camera begins to focus on the entranceway. The fans begin cheering loudly. For several long moments, there's nothing to be seen and the cheers become louder and louder in anticipation. Finally, the curtain parts and Val Venis steps out onto the stage in a black robe with purple trim. He stands at the edge of the stage and places his hands on his hips, looking out into the sea of fans with a satisfied look on his face.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] There he is, gentlemen... the man who would challenge Adam Cole and The Origin on this night, putting everything on the line... Val Venis.
[ Tony Schiavone ] A man who embodies everything good about Solid Gold Wrestling!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Say what you will about what Val Venis has done in his career, where he's been or even where he's going... but one word sums this man up above all others... loyalty! He made his name in Solid Gold Wrestling, from his historic rivalry over the SGW Television Championship with Rob Van Dam... to finally having all of his hard work pay off when he became the SGW World Heavyweight Champion in 2006! Val Venis may be wearing black and purple this evening but he bleeds gold!
Venis makes his way down to the ring, touching the hands of fans on the way down, stopping to shake hands with a few. Venis reaches the ringside area and looks up at the ring. He offers a solemn nod and approaches the ring steps.
[ Tony Schiavone ] This is a match that no one ever thought we would see. It was thought that Val Venis was permanently retired after his successful, hall of fame worthy career in the EWA... but when it came time to put it all on the line... to save Solid Gold Wrestling from monsters of its own creation, Val Venis couldn't resist and now he's back! Val Venis is HOME, Nigel!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] That, he is. The fact that this man holds prominent spots in two significant halls of fame in this industry... well, that blows the mind, wouldn't you say? He's a forma' SGW World Heavyweight Champion, New Era Wrestling World Heavyweight Champion, E-Wrestling Alliance World Heavyweight Champion... you name it and this man has done it! In all of his career, Val Venis has carried the torch for Solid Gold Wrestling, even when Solid Gold Wrestling couldn't carry it itself!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Well, he's hoping to pick up that torch one more time, tonight!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I wish him all the luck in the world!
Venis makes his way across the apron and steps through the ropes. Once he's inside the ring, he looks around, eyes wide with wonder as he takes in his surroundings. The fans continue cheering as Venis undoes the robe and removes it. He hands it off to Aubrey Edwards and she sees that it's handed off to a ringside attendance. Venis stands in the middle of the ring, hands on his hips.
[ Tony Schiavone ] Look at him... you can tell he didn't expect this. When he signed his SGW contract months ago, he had no idea he would be main eventing WrestleBrawl 3. Val Venis competed at the first-ever WrestleBrawl pay-per-view in 2001... he was a special guest referee at WrestleBrawl 2... and now here he is, almost fourteen years later, competing for the SGW World Heavyweight Championship.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] What an unpredictable business, this is.
"Glory Days" cuts and we're left in silence, nothing but the murmur of the crowd. After several long seconds, the lights dim and "End of the Revolution" by Shape of the New Sun hits! The fans erupt in boos! Pyrotechnics explode as the Golden-Tron flashes to life, giving us a sharp look at The Origin's logo:
Adam Cole is the first man out in his gear and a sleeveless "Origin" t-shirt. The SGW World Heavyweight Championship is strapped around his waist. He's only a few steps out onto the stage when he's followed out by Arn Anderson in jeans and a black polo shirt. Britt Baker is on Anderson's arm, wearing a short, black and gold dress that might as well be painted on for how tight it is.
[ Scott Steiner ] This fuckin' guy.
[ Tony Schiavone ] The SGW World Heavyweight Champion... Adam Cole. The man who unseated the seemingly unstoppable Randy Orton at Card Subject to Change... and then turned around and broke our hearts only two weeks later.
[ Scott Steiner ] Mother fucker looks like he weighs 'bout ninety pounds and he thinks he's got the fuckin' stones to lay his hands on a legend like Jeff Jarrett? And fuckin' why? Cause Arn Anderson said so? This guy ain't no real champion and he ain't gettin' past Val Venis tonight! That's some truth from a real, true blue SGW World Champion! Me! The Big Bad! Booty Daddy!
Cole, Anderson, and Baker make their way down to ringside. Anderson climbs the steps and walks across the apron first. Cole follows him up, taking Baker by the hand and guiding her up the steps after him. Anderson sits on the middle rope and Cole steps through, followed by Baker. Anderson follows them inside. Anderson glares at Venis and shakes his head in disappointment. Cole gives Baker a kiss and then shoves her away before getting right in Val's face! They stand nose to nose for a moment and Cole unsnaps the championship from around his waist, holding it up so that Val gets a real close look at it.
[ Tony Schiavone ] The arrogance of Adam Cole! He has no respect for anyone!
Cole smirks and points at himself with his thumb, shouting "BOOM!" right in Venis' face before backing up and holding the championship in the air for the fans to see, drawing intense heat from the fans in attendance. Cole joins Baker and Anderson in a separate corner as the lights dim and Justin Roberts takes center stage. He raises the microphone and begins to speak.
[ Justin Roberts ] In the corner to my left... the challenger... he is a man of much experience and many accomplishments... he is a former two-time SGW Television Champion, SGW United States Champion, SGW World Tag Team Champion, and SGW Worrrrrrrrrld Heavyweight Champion! He is a former two-time EWA Worrrrrrrld Heavyweight Champion! He is the first-ever New Era Wrestling Worrrrrrrrld Heavyweight Champion! And he is a member of the very first class of the Solid Gold Wrestling HALLLLLLLLLLLL OF FAAAAAAAAAAAAAME... VALLLLLLLLLL... VENISSSSSSSS!
Venis walks to the center of the ring and holds his arms out to the side. The fans cheer loudly. Venis turns and looks at Cole, making the "title belt" motion around his waist before returning to his corner.
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He's ready to do what it takes, gentlemen.
[ Scott Steiner ] He's in the best shape of his life. He ain't in Freakzilla shape, but I'm impressed his old ass was able to get that ripped.
Justin Roberts allows the crowd reaction to die down before continuing.
[ Justin Roberts ] Aaaaand his opponent... he is the current and reigning Solid Gold Wrestling WORRRRRLD Heavyweight Champion! He is--
Before Roberts can continue, Arn Anderson leans in and whispers something in his ear. Roberts nods and speaks once again.
[ Justin Roberts ] And he is the man who killllllllled The Legend Killer!
The fans erupt in boos. Cole laughs and points at himself with his thumb. Roberts prepares to speak again and Cole steps in close and grabs Roberts by the tie, pulling him in and whispering something into his ear. We see Roberts says "I'm not saying that--" before Cole points in his face and yells "SAY IT!" Roberts swallows hard and continues under duress.
[ Justin Roberts ] And... and he is the man... who made Jeff Jarrett into his bitch!
The entire arena vibrates with intense hatred from the fans. Cole laughs out loud.
[ Justin Roberts ] He is the one true SGW legend... he is--
Cole steps forward, shouting: "ADAM COLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE!"
Despite participating in his intro, the fans instantly begin booing him. He whips off the t-shirt and holds up the SGW World Heavyweight Championship before handing it off to Aubrey Edwards. She holds it out in front of her and Cole removes the chewing gum from his mouth and presses it onto the center plate, smirking as he does so.
[ Scott Steiner ] That no good son of a bitch!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] That is certainly not going to sit well with Val Venis.
Aubrey brings the championship over to Venis and presents it to him. He looks down at the championship and scowls. He reaches down and plucks the gum off the center plate. He looks at it quizzically for a moment, raising an eyebrow... before putting it into his own mouth and chewing it! Venis dusts his hands off and glares at Cole from across the ring. Cole shakes his head, pissed.
[ Tony Schiavone ] Would ya' look a that... Val Venis is getting inside the head of Adam Cole!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This is it, gentlemen! We're about to get this match underway!
Aubrey Edwards holds the championship over her head and then hands it off to Justin Roberts at ringside. She returns to the center of the ring, gesturing for Cole and Val Venis to meet her there. Venis and Cole stare one another down... and she calls for the bell to begin the match!
Cole and Venis stand eye to eye. Venis is all business. Cole is smiling arrogantly. Cole leans in and points at his chin, daring Venis to hit him. Venis nods and looks down for a moment... and then punches Cole right in the jaw! The fans erupt as Venis follows him in, nailing him with punch after punch, backing him into the corner! Venis continues throwing hands until Cole raises his arms to cover up! Venis grabs the top rope and begins kicking away at Cole's mid-section! Cole falls into a seated position and Venis begins stomping away at him! The fans are losing it! Finally, Arn Anderson grabs Cole and drags him out of the ring, saving him from Venis' onslaught!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Adam Cole, pulled from to safety by Arn Anderson!
Anderson guides Cole away from the corner, walking him around ringside with his arm around his shoulder. Val Venis wastes no time in climbing through the ropes and following him out. Venis is in hot pursuit but as he approaches Cole from the rear, Britt Baker jumps between them, daring Venis to hit her! "Do it, Val! You know you want to!" Venis looks down at his fists and then up at her before shaking his head... only for Adam Cole to shove Britt Baker into him! Baker stumbles forward into Val's arms and Val looks down at her in surprise! Val pushes her to the side... AND ADAM COLE NAILS HIM WITH A SUPER KICK! Val goes down to one knee and Cole bends over in front him, getting right in his face... before SLAPPING HIM ACROSS THE FACE!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Big mistake, Adam! Big, big mistake!
Venis comes alive and grabs Cole by either side of his head! He stands and slings Cole onto the apron by his head! Cole rolls under the bottom rope and returns to his feet as Venis follows him inside! Venis rises and Cole charges at him! Clothesline! No! Venis ducks it! Cole turns around and Venis hocks Cole's own gum right into his face!
[ Scott Steiner ] Fuck yeah! Get him, Venis!
Cole is taken aback by the gesture and snaps, throwing a huge haymaker but Val ducks it and catches Cole from behind... BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Venis covers Cole and hooks the leg! ONE! TWO! COLE KICKS OUT! Cole uses his momentum to crawl for the ropes, anything to stall the momentum of Venis! Venis stays on him, grabbing his ankle and dragging him back into the center of the ring! Cole flips over on his back and kicks Venis in the face! Once! Twice! Three times! Venis lets go and staggers back as Cole returns to his feet! Venis shakes off the impact and charges at Cole with a clothesline but Cole ducks it! Venis turns around and walks right into a boot to the gut... COLE-ATERAL! The impact causes Val to sit up in a seated position! Cole hits the ropes... LAST SHOTTTTTTT! NO! Venis moves! Venis scrambles back to his feet and Cole whips around to meet him! Venis goes for a big clothesline but Cole blocks it and thumbs Venis in the eye! Venis turns around, palming his eye, seething! Cole grabs him from behind... FLORIDA KEYS! Val lands all on his head and neck! Cole scrambles for a cover! ONE! TWO! VENIS KICKS OUT WITH FORCE!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Val Venis isn't going to stay down that easily!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] If Adam Cole thinks it's going to be that easy, he's got another thing coming! Val Venis is just getting started!
Cole returns to his feet and stares down at Venis as Venis pushes himself up to all fours. Cole leans in and slaps Venis in the face! Once! Twice! Venis catches Cole's wrist on the third attempt! Venis shakes his head, trembling with intensity, as he forces himself to stand. Cole sneers and boots Venis in the gut, cutting off his moment! Cole turns and runs to the ropes... but Venis follows him in and catches him on the turnaround with a kitchen sink! The impact sends Cole careening over Venis' knee and landing in a seated position! Cole's mouth hangs open in shock! Venis grabs him by the head and pulls him up, pulls him in, and DRILLS HIM WITH A JUMPING PILEDRIVER STRAIGHT INTO THE MAT! The fans "OOOOOOOH!" in surprise and Venis points toward the turnbuckle!
[ Tony Schiavone ] THIS IS IT! THIS IS IT! HE'S GOING FOR IT!
[ Scott Steiner ] THE FUCKIN' MONEY SHOT! HELL YEAH!
Val climbs the turnbuckles and makes his way up to the top... but as soon as he prepares to step onto the top rope, Britt Baker climbs onto the apron and grabs his foot! Venis looks at her, furious, and pushes her away with his boot! Aubrey Edwards charges over and begins yelling at Britt Baker to get down... and while she's distracted, Arn Anderson climbs onto the apron and nails Val Venis with a big right hand! Quarters fly in every direction!
[ Tony Schiavone ] What... what just happened!?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] That crafty ol' bastard just hit Val Venis with a roll of quarters!
Venis slumps forward on the top turnbuckle but before he can tumble back into the ring, Adam Cole leaps onto the middle rope, hooks Venis, and BRINGS HIM DOWN WITH COLE-ATERAL OFF THE MIDDLE ROPE! Venis sits up, his head wobbling like it's full of ball bearings! Cole points at Venis with the trusty gun fingers and pulls the triggers on both! He hits the ropes... LAST SHOTTTTTTT! HE GOT ALL OF IT! Cole covers! ONE! VENIS KICKS OUT WITH AUTHORITY!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] THAT. JUST. HAPPENED!
Venis rolls over on his side, huffing and puffing, red in the face Cole runs his hands through his hair. He can't believe it! Britt Baker is standing at ringside, hands on either side of her head. Arn Anderson just watches in silence, shaking his head. Cole gets up and posts up in the corner, waiting for Val to get up. Cole gestures for Venis to "bring it on," while shouting "GET UP, VAL! GET THE FUCK UP!" Venis gets up to his knees and Cole charges... SUPER KICK-- NO! Val catches Cole's foot! Venis stands up, shaking his head, sweat flying in every direction! Venis raises a middle finger and pulls Cole in close! T-BONE SUPLEX! Cole rag dolls on the mat and the momentum carries straight back to his feet! He bounces off the ropes and charges at Val, throwing a wild clothesline but Val ducks that and catches Cole on the turnaround... with a SECOND T-BONE SUPLEX!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Look at him go! Shades of Taz, one of his greatest rivals!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] One could say his relationship with Taz put him on the map! What a bloody tribute!
Cole quickly returns to his feet and staggers back toward Venis! Cole throws a big right hand and Venis ducks it... catching Cole in the TAZMISSION! The fans ERUPT! Venis locks it in tight! Cole reaches for the ropes, fighting to grab them but Venis drags him down to the mat and wraps his legs around Cole's waist, keeping it locked in! The fans begin chanting "TAP! TAP! TAP!" over and over as Cole struggles and reaches for the ropes!
[ Scott Steiner ] As somebody that's been locked in that mother fucker before, I can vouch that shit ain't comfortable! Adam Cole's pencil neck ain't gonna survive that shit!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Beat him if you can! Survive if he lets you, Adam Cole!
Cole reaches and reaches but he loses his ability to fight, fading away fast! Cole's arm begins to go limp as Anderson shouts at him to push through the pain! Aubrey Edwards takes Cole by the wrist and raises his arm! It drops! She raises it a second time... and it drops! She raises it a third time-- and Shane Douglas slides under the bottom rope with a bright yellow foam neck brace and heavy tape over his nose, damage accumulated from his death defying WrestleBrawl suicide dive! Aubrey Edwards leaps to her feet and heads him off, pointing at the entranceway and shouting at him to get out of the ring!
[ Scott Steiner ] What's this asshole doing!? Get the fuck outta there, Franchise! You fat shit!
Venis lets go of the Tazmission and pushes Cole to the side. Cole lays face down on the mat, out of it! Venis begins to advance on Douglas, approaching Edwards from the rear... but he's whipped around by STEVE CORINO! SUPER KICK! Venis takes it right on the chin and begins to fall backward but Corino catches his wrist and pulls him in... OLD SCHOOL EXPULSION! Corino pulls Cole on top of Venis and slides out of the ring! Edwards turns around! One! Two! Thr-- VENIS KICKS OUT!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Oh my goodness, how!?
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Val Venis is running on autopilot! He can't have anything left!
[ Tony Schiavone ] The Origin is pulling out every trick in the book to make this happen!
Adam Cole pushes himself up, looking distraught! He gets up to his knees and cradles Venis' head, plugging away with right hands before shoving him away! Cole gets back to his feet as Venis rolls over on his side before struggling to get up himself! Cole hangs onto the top rope, motioning for Venis to get up... Val slowly pushes himself up to one knee and then gets both feet underneath him. Venis is clearly out of it and he slowly turns around... into a CORONA KICK-- NO! Venis sidesteps it and catches Cole from behind... BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Venis maintains the hold upon landing, keeping Cole cinched in tight for a pin! Aubrey drops down to count... but quickly returns to her feet as Britt Baker climbs into the ring! Aubrey gets right in Baker's face, ordering her out of the ring... before flat out EJECTING HER! The fans pop huge!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Justice is served! Get her outta' there, Aubrey!
Britt huffs and turns to leave but then thinks better of it... before turning and nailing Aubrey with a stiff forearm! Britt mounts Aubrey and begins punching away at her until she's completely out of it! Venis rises and grabs Baker by the hair, pulling her off of the unconscious Aubrey Edwards! Behind him, Arn Anderson slides a steel chair into the ring! Venis whips Baker around, looking her dead in the face! He points at her with wide eyes and pulls her in... for a PILEDRIVER-- CRACK!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] No, dammit! Not like this!
Adam Cole blasts Venis across the back with the steel chair! Britt Baker falls away from him and rolls out of the ring! Venis tenses up and slowly turns around, visibly in pain! Cole taps the chair on the mat and raises it over his head once again... but Venis catches it on the downswing and jerks it out of Cole's hands! Cole begins begging Venis off... and drops to his knees, holding his hands up, crossing his heart and hoping to die! Venis is seething, spittle flying from his mouth with every labored breath!
[ Tony Schiavone ] I don't care if he's defenseless or not! Do it, Val! Do it!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] This is everything or nothing, Val! It's now or bloody never!
[ Scott Steiner ] Take your god damn place in history! Finish him off!
Val raises the chair and brings it down... ON THE HEAD OF SHANE DOUGLAS! SHANE DOUGLAS THREW HIMSELF IN THE LINE OF FIRE TO PROTECT ADAM COLE! Douglas falls to the side, unconscious, maybe even DEAD with the ruined remains of the steel chair around his already injured neck! Venis even looks surprised... and Adam Cole lunges forward, raising his arm into the groin of Val Venis! Venis doubles over and Cole rises to his feet! He points at his crotch, "SUCK MY DICK, BITCH!' PANAMA SUNRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE! VAL VENIS IS D.E.A.D! DEAD!
[ Tony Schiavone ] WHATAMANEUVER!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] I've never seen Val Venis take a move like that before! Not even in his prime!
[ Scott Steiner ] Fuck, he's dead! God dammit, he was so fuckin' close!
Cole covers Val and hooks the leg but Aubrey Edwards is still down! Cole shakes his head back and forth, frustrated! He pounds his own hand on the mat! ONE! TWO! THREE! But it doesn't count! Cole grabs a handful of hair and yanks it, sweat pouring off his face! Here comes Rick Knox! The fans boo loudly as Knox slides under the bottom rope! He leaps into place! ONE! TWO! THR-- VAL VENIS GETS A SHOULDER UP! Cole cries out in frustration, shouting "ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?" Rick Knox holds up two fingers right in Cole's face! Cole stands up, grabbing Knox by the shirt, demanding a three count but Knox won't budge. Cole lets go of his shirt and backs away, running his hand through his hair... AND THEN SUPER KICKS RICK KNOX!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Oh come on! The man was doin' his bloody job!
Steve Corino applauds loudly at ringside, offering a thumbs up in appreciation for what Cole just did! Cole shakes his head in disgust but then turns right around into... A LOW BLOW FROM VENIS! Venis maintains his positioning, keeping his forearm buried against Cole's testicles as Cole cries out in pain! Venis then lowers his arm and raises it again! And again! And again! FOUR DEVASTATING NUT SHOTS IN A ROW! Cole drops to his knees and Venis stands up, trembling with intensity! He looks down at Cole and then turns to hit the ropes... NAILING COLE WITH A LAST SHOT OF HIS OWN! Cole goes down face first on the mat but instead of going for a cover, Venis makes a detour toward the ropes... and KNOCKS STEVE CORINO OFF THE APRON WITH A BIG RIGHT HAND! The fans pop huge as Corino tumbles to the floor and flops around like a fish! Venis beats his chest with one fist as the fans go wild... AND VENIS TURNS AROUND INTO AN ARN ANDERSON SPINE BUSTER!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] For Christ's sake! It's a joke at this point!
[ Tony Schiavone ] I just don't see how Val Venis can pull it off, guys... the numbers game is too much!
Anderson stands over Venis, breathing heavily. The fans are booing loudly until... Jeff Jarrett emerges from the back with a guitar! He charges down the ramp and slides under the bottom rope! Arn Anderson meets him coming in, nailing him with a right hand! Jarrett drops the guitar and begins brawling with Anderson! Anderson and Jarrett tumble through the ropes to the floor and trade punches all the way up the ramp!
[ Scott Steiner ] Get him, Double J! Beat the shit outta that old bastard!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Who expected this!? The founda' of Solid Gold Wrestling fighting it out wit' the current owna'! The ultimate power struggle! Jeff Jarrett is here t' this main event goes off without furtha' complication!
Neither man is willing to give an inch as they reach the top of the stage! The fans are entirely focused on Anderson and Jarrett as they fight to the edge! Jarrett nails Anderson with a big right hand and he teeters on the edge of a fifteen foot drop! Anderson rallies back and nails Jarrett with a big right of his own! And then RANDY ORTON emerges from the back, charges, and SHOVES BOTH MEN OFF THE STAGE, THROUGH TABLES AND ELECTRONIC EQUIPMENT FIFTEEN FEET BELOW! The lights flicker and sparks fly in every direction! Jeff Jarrett and Arn Anderson could both be dead!
[ Scott Steiner ] Randy god damn Orton! Again!? This ain't his fuckin' show! He don't deserve t' be here, dammit! He's the pussy that up and disappeared after he lost his belt! Go back to whatever hole you crawled out of, you piece o' shit!
[ Tony Schiavone ] We could use some medics out here for Arn Anderson and Jeff Jarrett!
Orton stands at the edge of the stage, looking down at the smoking carnage below him. Edge, Christian, and Chavo Guerrero, Jr. charge out from the back. Chavo is gripping Pepe anxiously, nervous. They rush to the edge and look down, fifteen feet below. Edge motions toward the back and EMTs rush out, swarming the area and checking on the downed Jarrett and Anderson! Edge shoves Orton and Orton shoves him back before security rushes in and gets between them! Orton raises his middle finger right in Edge's face, shouting "Fuck you, Adam!" before smirking and walking to the back with an arrogant swagger!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] And just like that, he's gone! Good riddance, I say!
Inside the ring, Cole and Venis are both laid out in the middle. Paul Turner charges out from the back and slides under the bottom rope. He rises to his feet and begins the mandatory ten count! He reaches even before Adam Cole rolls over and places his hand on the middle rope, using it to pull himself up. Venis begins to stir at eight and manages to push himself up to one knee before Turner reaches ten! Venis stands up on spaghetti legs and turns right around into... A SUPER KICK FROM ADAM COLE! NO! VENIS SIDESTEPS IT... AND PAUL TURNER GETS HIT! Paul Turner goes down in a heap! Adam Cole shouts "FUCK!" and whips around into a big boot to the gut from Val Venis! Venis pulls him in... BRAINBUSTER! Venis returns to his feet and gets blasted from behind by Steve Corino! Venis goes to one knee and Corino posts up in the corner, sizing up Venis! Venis manages to get back up to both feet and slowly turns around! Corino's going for a SUPER KICK OF HIS OWN... but he's grabbed from the outside... BY PAC! The fans pop huge as PAC grabs Corino by the ankle and drags him out of the ring! Corino and PAC brawl all the way up the ramp for the second time tonight before disappearing behind the curtain!
[ Tony Schiavone ] That'll do it! We're down to one on one!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Britt Baker is still at ringside but with the carnage at hand, she has to know what a mistake it would be to get involved at this point in the game!
Speak of the devil, Britt Baker seizes Adam Cole by the ankle and struggles to drag him out of the ring. He leans against the apron, visibly out of it, and she slaps him in the face in an attempt to get him back in the game. Venis shakes his head and climbs out of the ring, pushing Baker out of the way and grabbing Cole by the hair. He pushes Cole hard into the ring post and then tosses him onto the announce table!
[ Scott Steiner ] God damn! What the fuck are you doin', Val!?
[ Tony Schiavone ] I... I think we should move, guys!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Clear a bloody path!
Venis peppers Cole with right hands! Cole remains on the table, not moving... and Val points at the turnbuckles! The fans begin cheering loudly and Venis climbs onto the apron. He enters the ring and climbs the turnbuckles. With gritted teeth, Val rests with one foot on the top turnbuckle. He looks down at Cole on the announce table... the fans are waiting with bated breath.
[ Tony Schiavone ] He can't! He won't! We've never seen Val do something like this!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Not even in his bloody prime! He knows how important this is!
Venis gets both feet on the top rope... and FLIES!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] MONEY SHOT FROM THE BLOODY HEAVENS!
And Britt Baker pulls Adam Cole off the table! VENIS FLIES THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE ON HIS OWN! HE'S CRASHED AND BURNED! Adam Cole is on his knees, arms around the waist of Britt Baker. He looks at the wreckage in genuine horror! Britt points at Venis' broken body and begins shrieking, "GET HIM IN THE RING, ADAM! BABY, GET HIM IN THE RING!" Cole scrambles forward on his knees and gets to his feet before grabbing Venis by his wrist. He tries Venis out of the wreckage and attempts to dead lift him onto the apron! Britt helps Cole get Venis onto the apron and shoves him under the bottom rope. Cole rests against the apron for a moment before rolling in after him. Cole remains in a seated position next to Venis and then falls over him, halfheartedly hooking his leg in the process. The fans boo loudly as Mike Chioda emerges from the back and charges down to the ring! He slides underneath the bottom rope and right into position!
[ Tony Schiavone ] It has to be over! Val Venis must have internal injuries after that fall!
VAL VENIS GETS A SHOULDER UP! Cole rolls off of Venis and appears to be visibly sobbing, devastated that the match just... won't... end! Cole returns to his feet and eyes the guitar lying on the mat, left behind by Jeff Jarrett! Cole picks the guitar up and holds it up in front of his face, looking at it with teeth bared. "GET UP, VAL! TIME TO DIE, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!" Val gets up to all fours and then up to one knee. Venis stands up, his knees trembling, ready to give out any second! Venis motions for Cole to bring it on and Cole raises the guitar over his head... AND MIKE CHIODA YANKS IT OUT OF HIS HANDS! The fans pop huge! Adam Cole looks shocked and Chioda sets the guitar down on the mat, pointing at the SGW logo on his shirt! "YOU USE THAT... AND THIS MATCH IS OVER!"
[ Tony Schiavone ] YOU TELL HIM, MIKE!
CORONA KICK ON MIKE CHIODA! The fans boo loudly as Chioda tumbles through the ropes, rag dolls on the apron, and lands on the floor below! Cole turns around... and Venis has the guitar in his hands! The fans are cheering loudly as Venis prepares to bash it over Cole's head... but Britt Baker kicks Venis in the nuts from behind! The fans erupt in boos as Venis drops the guitar and falls to his knees! Suddenly, Aubrey Edwards returns to the ring... and tackles Britt Baker to the mat, slugging away at her with rights and lefts before dumping her through the ropes to the floor!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Did that just bloody happen!?
[ Tony Schiavone ] Ref Aubrey is the real deal! You don't wanna cross the senior official!
Adam Cole looks on in surprise at what just happened but then averts his gaze back at Venis on his knees! Cole shakes his head and goes for a SUPER KICK but Venis manages to catch Cole with a low blow of his own! Venis returns to his feet... BLUE THUNDER BOMB-- NO! COLE SLIPS OUT AND LANDS ON HIS FEET BEHIND VENIS! Cole shoves Venis forward into the ropes and grabs the guitar! Venis rebounds off the ropes and COLE SWINGS THE GUITAR! VENIS DUCKS IT AND CATCHES COLE ON THE TURNAROUND WITH A SCHOOLBOY ROLL-UP! ONE! TWO! THREE!
- WINNER & NEW CHAMPION -
The roof blows off the place as Venis releases the hold and falls flat on his back on the mat, his chest heaving up and down from exertion. Adam Cole remains in a seated position with wide eyes, not fully realizing what just happened!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] He's done it! He's bloody done it!
[ Tony Schiavone ] For the second time in his career, Val Venis is the Solid Gold Wrestling WORLD Heavyweight Champion!
[ Scott Steiner ] I ain't gonna lie, I ain't always liked this fuckin' guy but I'm proud t' sit here and witness what he's done tonight! Fought and earned like a real god damn man!
The locker room empties out, led by Edge and Christian. Aubrey Edwards retrieves the SGW World Heavyweight Championship from ringside and kneels down next to Venis. Edge, Christian, Chavo Guerrero, Jr., Bret "The Hitman" Hart, Ric Flair, Trish Stratus, Cody Rhodes, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, AZM, Starlight Kid, Colt Cabana, Kurt Angle, Jason Jordan, John Cena, Danhausen, Vinny, Chris Dickinson, Elias, The Young Bucks, The Rock, Nia Jax, Team Kick, Hana Kimura, Paul London, The JOB Squad, Shawn Michaels, Kenny Omega, PAC, Matt Riddle, Kris Statlander, Candy Floss, The Best Friends, Orange Cassidy, Lance Storm, Justin Credible, Billy Gunn, The Dudley Boyz, Tha' Tru Warriorz, and Stevie Ray among others flood the ring, celebrating!
[ Scott Steiner ] Hold on a second! I gotta get me a piece o' this!
Steiner puts his headset down and climbs into the ring. A mob of wrestlers hoist Val Venis onto their shoulders as confetti and pyrotechnics rain down around the ring. Venis has the SGW World Heavyweight Championship draped over his shoulder and he barely has enough energy to hold his head up and celebrate this, the biggest moment in his entire career!
[ Tony Schiavone ] Ladies and gentlemen, what a war... history has been made! The Origin has been defeated and Val Venis is our new SGW World Heavyweight Champion... I don't know what else to say... what a moment... what a night!
[ Nigel McGuinness ] Absolutely, Tony... what a ride it's been to get here tonight... let's just leave it at that, shall we? For Tony Schiavone and "Big Poppa Pump" Scott Steiner, this is Nigel McGuinness signing off for WrestleBrawl 3! Goodnight, everyone!
The camera zooms in on Val Venis being carried around on Edge and Christian's shoulders, everyone in the ring and in the audience cheering him on as we fade to black.