SHOCK: The Road to Supremacy | January 21st, 2006 | Live From: Atlanta, Georgia | Commentators: Joey Styles & Don Callis
[ Don Harris ] All o'you take your thumbs outta' your asses and listen up.. The boss has got somethin' to say..
-[[ Carlito stands up amongst the wrestlers and speaks out much to the annoyance of everyone else. ]]-
[ Carlito ] Yes, everyone listen closely.. When Boss Jarrett speaks, he means what he say.. And 'dat... Dat's cool!
-[[ Everyone grumbles.. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] Sit down and put an apple in it, ass hat..
-[[ Carlito turns around quickly with an offended look on his face.. He raises his hand, revealing an apple and points at Jericho in an accusing manner.. Jericho looks annoyed, but carefree as usual. ]]-
[ Carlito ] Do you want it? Do you want the apple?
-[[ Carlito raises it and starts to take a bite, but Jarrett clears his throat and Carlito quickly sits down. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Thank you, Carlito.. But I'll take it from here if ya' don't mind...
-[[ Jarrett looks around at everyone and he can tell just from the looks on their faces whether or not they're on his side... And they know exactly what this is about... When Jarrett is sure he has their undivided attention, he continues. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Unless you've been sleepin' under a rock for the last week, ya' know what I'm about to talk about... And ya' know what we have to do about it.... Last week on Shock... On live television... My crew and myself were assaulted by that... Animal.. That goes by the name o'Dave Batista!!
-[[ Jim Cornette stands up, flailing his arms around and rambling with that machine gun he calls a mouth. ]]-
[ Jim Cornette ] Now, see here, I tell you what, there's a lot of things I'll stand for in this business because hell, I been in it for damn near s'long as I can remember and I have never and I mean never been accosted in the middle of the ring like I was by that asshole and I'll be damned and I do mean GOD DAMNED, Jeff, if I allow it to happen again to me or anybody else AGAIN!! That fuckin' asshole--
-[[ Trevor Murdoch stands up, fury in his eyes. ]]-
[ Trevor Murdoch ] Now, hold on right juss' this second, Mistry Cornette, who are yew.. WHO DO YEW THANK YER CALLIN' A FUCKIN' ASSHOLE!?
-[[ Cornette turns around, confused. ]]-
[ Jim Cornette ] Who.. Who do you think I'm callin' a fuckin' asshole? I'm obviously talkin' about Dave Batista, you god damn idiot, he's the whole reason we've all been huddled in this room like a bunch of damned cattle, I mean, Jesus Christ, son, it's crowded, I think I'm breakin' out in hives!!
-[[ Murdoch puts his hands up like he's just made a huge mistake. ]]-
[ Trevor Murdoch ] LORD, I APOLOGIZE!! I thought yew was talkin' about... Talkin' about somebody else..
[ Jim Cornette ] Well, I wasn't, so shut the fuck up and let Jeff finish!!
-[[ Jarrett rubs his eyes with his thumb and index finger, this latest exchange having just resulted in the loss of several brain cells.... He looks back up and speaks in a stern tone.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Both of ya'... Sit down.
[ Trevor Murdoch ] Oh, yes, sir.. Yes, sir, Mistry Jarrett, I do apologize, rightly so.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Sit down.
-[[ Trevor Murdoch sits back down and Jarrett continues. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Last week, we made history.. Debutin' a new face o'Solid Gold Wrestlin'... We buried Shane McMahon and made Val Venis put his mentor, Arn Anderson, in the grave... And then we sent him home singin' the blues... We announced that Carrie Underwood was gonna be singin' with yours truly--
[ Trevor Murdoch ] I like Merle.. Why couldn't ye' get Merle?
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Merle's dead, Trevor.. Dead like Taz.. Dead like Ric Flair..
-[[ Edge laughs and pulls Stacy close, licking the side of her face. ]]-
[ Edge ] Dead like Val Venis!!
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Touché, Edge.. Ha ha...
[ Mike Awesome ] DEAD!! LIKE OWEN FUCKIN' HART!!
-[[ Lance Storm elbows Awesome in the side as the room goes silent. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Sit... Now.
-[[ Jarrett continues. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And we announced that the main event of Six-String Supremacy, the biggest SGDubya pay-per-view of ALLLLLLL time is gonna be the world premiere for the trailer of the movie written and directed... BY ME... CHOSEN ONE: THE LEGEND OF JEFF JARRETT!!
-[[ Melina begins applauding loudly, the sound echoing in the room as no one else responds. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] It should'a been the biggest nights in the history of our sport--
[ Chris Jericho ] Thanks for the insight, Schiavone.
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Shut it, Jericho, you just cost yourself a world title shot.
-[[ Jericho scoffs. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] Speaking of that, jerky, when are you going to defend that thing?
[ Jeff Jarrett ] That don't concern you, Jericho, 'cause at this rate, I'm gonna defend it against.... Mike Sanders before I defend it against your ass!! Hell, I'll GIVE it to Mike Sanders before I let you have a shot at it!!
-[[ Everyone laughs out loud. ]]-
[ Carlito ] Mike Sanders.. World champion!? Dat's NOT cool!!
-[[ Mike Sanders stands up, yanking Torrie Wilson up by the arm with him.. Mark Jindrak stands up with him.. Sanders is furious and Jindrak doesn't look too happy either.. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] Kiss my ass!! You're trying to EMBARRASS ME!?
-[[ Ken Kennedy is nearly guffawing as he stands up and comments. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] You embarrassed yourself when you decided to leave the house with that TRAMP!
-[[ Torrie gasps and Sanders clenches his fists like he's ready to fight... Edge stands up behind them and places a hand on Torrie's shoulder.. He has a genuinely caring look on his face. ]]-
[ Edge ] I don't think you're a tramp, babe.. Why don't you come back to my room after the show and join me in some...
-[[ He smiles evilly. ]]-
[ Edge ] Crazy sex.. I assure you, it's only illegal in forty-eight states..
-[[ He licks his teeth and when Sanders sees the smile on her face, he pulls her away from Edge.. He, Torrie, and Jindrak quickly move through the crowd of wrestlers until they're a safe distance away... Sanders begins yelling again. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] Yeah, that's real funny.. Keep making jokes!! I'll show you... I'LL SHOW YOU ALL!!
-[[ He stops, shaking with intensity.. ]]-
[ Mike Sanders ] And by the time you realize you made a mistake by underestimating me... YOU'LL ALL BE S.O....L!! AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE HELL THAT MEANS!!
-[[ Christian, seated near Sanders' current position looks to be thinking the term over.. ]]-
[ Christian ] Suck... Out.... Loud? No, that can't be right... Because then.. YOU would be S... O... L...
-[[ Trish laughs. ]]-
[ Trish Stratus ] I bet he's... Sick.. Of... LOSING, too!!
[ Tyson Tomko ] Owned.
-[[ Sanders just turns and walks out of the room, leaving everyone laughing at him... Jarrett continues. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Now, I've taken a few measures to make sure we have law and order here in SGDubya... Now, besides havin' Ron and Don to make sure we have an entertainin' product on television and Gene Snitsky to make sure there ain't no unwanted outbursts backstage... I've named a man to be our locker room leader and make sure things don't get said that don't NEED to be said... And that the proper respect is shown to your superiors... In short, he's an enforcer... Of locker room etiquette.. For lack of a better word.. You get out o'line.. And he'll knock you back in it..
-[[ Jarrett directs everyone to the side of the room where, sitting by himself in a steel folding chair is The Undertaker.. He sits quietly, chewing tobacco in his mouth, and tightening his gloves... He stares everyone in the room down behind his sun glasses..... And then spits in the floor.. A girl's scream fills the air as this revelation hits... And everyone turns to see who made the shrill noise.. It was no girl. ]]-
[ The Blue Meanie ] He'll kill us all!! HE'LL KILL US ALL!!
-[[ And he faints and is quickly caught and held up by Stevie Richards and Super Nova.. Jarrett smirks. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] He ends careers...... So stay in line.
-[[ Jarrett waits for the panic in the room to settle down.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And another measure I've taken... Is to ensure that Ric Flair and that ring rat, Rena Mero, are banned from the buildin' forever.. Because they ain't nothin' but bad news... Flair ain't done nothin' but stir shit between me an' Batista and I do hold him responsible for what happened last week....... And as for old Sable...
[ Elix Skipper ] She's an ugly ass bitch!
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Ya' got that right, Shelton, and one ugly bitch is one too many.. Can I get an amen?
[ Ken Kennedy ] AAAAAAAAAAAA-MEN!! ...........Amen!
[ Voice ] I've been meaning to discuss that with you, Jeff..
-[[ Everyone in the room gasps and goes dead silent as they hear the voice.. Jarrett turns around and his face turns white as a ghost as he's presented with the suited frame of one David Batista...... Batista has a dead serious look on his face, but his eyes are hidden behind a small pair of shades...... Jarrett begins stammering, looking for something to say. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Ah.... Uh.... Big Dave... Why.. Ahem..
[ Carlito ] You can do it, Jeff!! Kick his ass!!
-[[ Jarrett turns around to Carlito with wide eyes and makes the "cut it out" motion across his throat frantically.. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] No one told me about a meeting..
-[[ Russo strolls up with a cocky smile on his face. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] What? You didn't get the memo? That's tough luck, pal.
-[[ Dave gives Russo a look that almost makes him shit his pants. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] Uh, Jeff... I'm going to excuse myself to the shitta'.. I don't feel so good..
-[[ Almost? He leaves the room. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] We were just discussin' some issues...
[ Dave Batista ] I'd like to discuss some issues myself..
-[[ Batista removes his sunglasses and smiles.. A sarcastic, stabbing smile. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] If you don't mind.... Boss.
-[[ Jarrett shakes his head. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] I know what I did last week has made me a target... And I know what I did is frowned upon.. By the management... But after having a week to think things over... I think we can both come to the same conclusion....
-[[ Batista shrugs.. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Hey, we all make mistakes..
-[[ Jarrett smiles nervously. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] I sat back and I thought to myself and I realized.. Hey, Jeff is probably under a lot of pressure.. I mean.. I know I would be if I had a company with Solid Gold Wrestling's history dropped in my lap.. And hey.. He's got the pressure of being the world champion on top of that........ So, that's probably why he overreacted and had Ric thrown out... And maybe, just maybe that's why he had Shane and Arn taken out...
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Yeah... Yeah, of course... A lot of... Pressure..
[ Dave Batista ] That's what I thought... Now, I've made my assumption and I tried to figure out your problem.. Now I'll let you have a little insight... Into mine.. And why I did... What I did....... Last week, pressure or no pressure, I saw a man show this great company absolutely... No respect.... Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here--
[ Chris Jericho ] Hey, Dennis Miller's in the house.. Give him a round of applause.
[ Jim Cornette ] Oh shit, you god damn idiot, why oh why am I sittin' next to this guy, for the love o'Christ..
-[[ Batista takes the shot in stride, not even looking in Jericho's direction. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Solid Gold Wrestling is one of the greatest companies in the world today.. It's got a lot of history behind it.. And when I saw you disrespecting that history by doing what you did to Arn and Shane... It made me angry... And when you disrespected two of my friends, Ric and Rena......... That made me... VERY.... Angry... And I decided to make a point.. And some guys in this business, they don't take points too well... You can't talk to them...
-[[ Jarrett wipes the sweat off his brow. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] You have to beat it into them.
-[[ Batista lets that settle in the air for a second. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] I showed everyone in that ring at the end of Shock.. That if you disrespect someone or something.. You're going to get disrespected right back... I respect the hell out of Solid Gold Wrestling and everything it's done to make this business what it is...... And I respect that championship belt you're carrying around like a trophy... And I respect every single man that held that belt.. And worked their asses off to make it exactly what it is......
-[[ Another pause, no one dares speak up now. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] But just because I respect that belt... I don't have to respect the man that wears it.
-[[ Jarrett looks down and closes his eyes... Before reopening them and speaking. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Dave... Big man... I think what we have here.. Is a bad case of miscommunication...
-[[ Jarrett looks around nervously. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And I think that's a problem we need to solve right now, ya' see.... How about you follow me around tonight... And you give me your advice on how we can make this company better.... For me... And for the wrestlers... And hell, Dave... I'll even personally call Ric Flair and invite him to the show!!
-[[ Batista smiles.. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Come on, Jeff... You're not just saying that so I won't kick your ass, are you?
-[[ Jarrett laughs. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Of course not, Big Dave!!
[ Carlito ] JEFF JARRETT FEARS NOTHING!! MAN OR BEAST!!
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Shut it, Carlito!!
[ Dave Batista ] I'd like that, Jeff.. I think this could be the beginning.. Of a beautiful friendship..
-[[ Batista throws an arm around Jarrett's shoulder.. Jarrett looks really uncomfortable.. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Yeah, Dave... So, go get ready for your match.. And after it's over, we'll talk business.. And hell, I'll let you main event tonight!! So, go on and get ready and we'll talk after the show.. About what we can do to make SGDubya' better... And all that...
[ Dave Batista ] That's alright, Jeff.. I don't have to main event.. As a matter of fact.. I'll just go have my match now.. That way we can spend the show together and get a more.. Hands on approach on making Solid Gold better...
-[[ Batista turns to the crowd of wrestlers. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] You ready, Kennedy?
-[[ Kennedy stands up, looking like the life has been drained from his body. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] Actually, Mister Batista, I seem to have come down with a bad case of the flu between arriving here tonight and this moment in which I stand here before you...... So without further incident, I must intelligently and in a courteous... AND THOUGHTFUL MANNER........ Bow out of our match, for fear of infecting you with this oh-so-contagious flu....... Thank you.
-[[ He sits back down and crosses his arms with a smug look on his face... Batista's response is unexpected. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Oh, come on.. What's a flu to a man like me? Besides, that's part of dedicating yourself to the business, Ken... You take risks and you work through sickness and injuries.... Let's go give'em a show..
Kennedy's face drops..
The fear is back.. He slowly stands up and takes a last look at the men
before him... He then turns and walks out of the room and through the
curtain to the ring as his music hits and the fans give him a loud round
of boos...... Batista, still standing in the back, removes his jacket,
dress shirt, and tie before going to the ring in his slacks... All of the
wrestlers turn their attention to a monitor to witness the match.
Title on the Line: None
Referee: Nick Patrick
Winner: Ken Kennedy via Pin Fall
[ Melina ] How is that... I don't get.... Did that just HAPPEN!?
-[[ Jarrett can only nod. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] What an embarrassment.. If that was me--
-[[ Bob Orton cuts him off quickly. ]]-
[ "Cowboy" Bob Orton ] No, son.. Don't even compare yourself to that... That machine gunnin' idiot.
[ Chris Jericho ] Who cares.. Call someone to scrape the road kill out of the ring and let's get on with the show, baby!!
-[[ Wrestlers begin filing out of the room, each preparing for their respective matches.. Soon enough, only the staff, minus Russo, Edge, Stacy, Randy Orton, Bob Orton, and the Christian Coalition are left in the room.. Jarrett flicks the monitor off and turns to the people left standing in front of him.. ]]-
[ Christian ] Well..... I don't know about you guys.. But I.. Thought it was an admirable showing. How about you, Tomko?
[ Tyson Tomko ] No.
[ Christian ] Fair enough.. One of you guys can call the ambulance, I'm going to get dressed for the curb stomping that is scheduled to take place......... Oh, at the top of the hour.. Come on, Edge..
-[[ Edge and Christian turn to walk away when Jarrett speaks up. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] I'm gonna get a breath o'fresh air and I'll be right there with ya', Christian..
-[[ Christian stops and turns around.. An eyebrow raised.. ]]-
[ Christian ] What's that?
[ Jeff Jarrett ] I'll be ready for our match later tonight.. The one for the tag titles.. Remember?
-[[ Christian looks at Edge, confused.. Then he looks at the Coalition.. They all exchange confused looks. ]]-
[ Christian ] Am I missing something?
-[[ No one answers. ]]-
[ Christian ] OH! OH SNAP!
-[[ Christian points at Jarrett. ]]-
[ Christian ] Special guest referee.. YOU!! Oh, man.. I love the way you think, Jeff..
-[[ Jarrett laughs. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Ha ha.. Good one, Christian.. Don't think I didn't get what ya' were sayin' last week... You wanted a partner to win your fourth tag team titles with.. Ya' wanted to break the record held by them damn Dudley Boyz..... And I asked ya' who ya' wanted your partner to be.. And you were right, I DID know who ya' wanted...
-[[ Christian points at Edge, hoping Jarrett will get the picture. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] ........ME!!
[ Edge ] What?!
[ Christian ] No, no, Jeff...... I wanted Edge.. Breaking the record doesn't mean anything if we don't do it TOGETHER!!
[ Jeff Jarrett ] You sayin' ya' don't wanna team with me?
[ Christian ] YES!! I mean, NO... I mean... Sure, I'd love to team with you, Jeff... But NOT TONIGHT!!
-[[ This is tearing everyone up.. ]]-
[ Christian ] Listen, Jeff.... I have to team with Edge tonight.. HAVE TO...
-[[ Randy Orton gets in Christian's face without warning. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] Maybe you don't HAVE to team up with anyone at all tonight...
-[[ Orton smirks. ]]-
[ Randy Orton ] Maybe I'll replace YOU in the match.. And me and Jeff will win those tag team titles!!
[ Christian ] Excuse me? And you are?
[ Randy Orton ] Randy... ORTON........ LEGEND KILLER..
-[[ Christian smiles cockily right in Orton's face. ]]-
[ Christian ] Well, Randy... Orton.... LEGEND KILLER... I suggest you check yourself.. Before you wreck yourself.. Or your ridiculous, clichéd little Legend Killer Tour.. Is gonna end up like that television show Arrested Development... CANCELED!!
-[[ Jarrett pushes Orton aside... ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Stay out o'this, Orton.. This is 'tween me and Christian.... It seems we've had a misunderstandin' of our own, Christian.. And I'm sorry, but the match is already booked.. Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie... Versus Christian and the SGDubya World Heavyweight Champion......... Jeff Jarrett!!
-[[ Edge and Christian both look pissed... But before anything else is said, Batista re-enters the room, fresh off his LOSS with Kennedy... He looks around and sees everyone is a bit bent out of shape.... He speaks. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] That Kennedy's a real trooper, I tell ya'.. I didn't see that one coming..
-[[ No one responds. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] Is something wrong?
-[[ Christian grumbles. ]]-
[ Christian ] Everything's peachy.. Just great. I'm gonna go get ready for my match..
-[[ Christian storms out with Edge and the Coalition in tow.. Batista walks over to Jarrett with a smile on his face. ]]-
[ Dave Batista ] So, where do we start? Oh, I know...
Batista grabs his
jacket from the chair he left it on earlier.. He removes a cell phone from
the pocket and hands it to Jarrett.. Jarrett just looks at it, knowing
he's about to make the most difficult phone call of his life... He smiles
at Batista and dials the number of Ric Flair.
Title on the Line: None
Stipulation: Singapore Cane Match
Referee: Jimmy Cordaris
Winner: Rhino via Pin Fall
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Ken Kennedy, I must say, what you did to Dave Batista tonight was one o'the most impressive things I have ever witnessed in my life.. He ain't around is he?
-[[ Show, Kennedy, and Carlito all look around.. They all three shake their heads.. ]]-
[ The Big Show ] Nowhere in sight... And even if he was.. I'd crush him for the SECOND time tonight..
-[[ Carlito laughs and tosses an apple in the air, catching it. ]]-
[ Carlito ] Nothing would make Carlito happier.. Than having the pleasure of spitting in tha' face.. Of Dave Batista!
-[[ Ken Kennedy just sits back and smiles... Knowing he's made an impact that will be felt for quite some time now.. ]]-
[ Ken Kennedy ] Mister Jarrett, it was an honor to be the man that stopped every ounce of momentum that Mister David Batista had built up on the last edition of SGW Shock... And now, I can only hope to mold that momentum and make it my own as I climb the ladder here in Solid Gold... Wrestling.......
-[[ Everyone laughs evilly. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Don't worry about a thing, Kennedy.. Because from now on, you've got it made..
-[[ Before they can continue, the group is approached by Lance Storm, Mike Awesome, Elix Skipper, Major Gunnz... And Chris Jericho, an ally of Team Canada... Lance Storm is the first to speak.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Mister Jarrett, could we speak to you in private?
-[[ Jarrett turns and motions for Show, Kennedy, and Carlito to leave.. They do.. Jarrett turns back to Team Canada. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] What'cha got for me?
[ Lance Storm ] We have a request for the pay-per-view...
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Shoot.
-[[ Storm turns and looks at the rest of Team Canada and at Jericho, maybe to see if any of them have any exceptions to what he's about to present to the owner and world champion.... No one speaks up so he continues. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Well, we noticed last week.. That you had added quite a bit of non-wrestling content to the pay-per-view.. Such as your duet with Carrie Underwood.. And the debut of your new movie trailer.......
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Because fans pay for entertainment, not wrestlin'..
-[[ This catches Storm off guard.. He clears his throat and continues, trying not to look or sound offended. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Of course.. But.. We were wondering if we could add our own non-wrestling ceremony to the pay-per-view..... A celebration of our Canadian heritage... A tribute to the Canadian greats that have graced Solid Gold Wrestling in the past.. Such as Bret Hart, former world champion......
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Untalented hack.
[ Lance Storm ] ...Or Val Venis, who has held many championships...
-[[ Jarrett almost laughs out loud. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] And lost'em all in very short order, but I get ya'..
[ Lance Storm ] Or Edge and Christian.. Multiple time tag team champions....
-[[ Jarrett totally ignores the point. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] He's winnin' another one tonight, ya' heard?
[ Lance Storm ] Yes.
-[[ Jarrett gets down to brass tacks. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Well, that's fine.. If ya' want your little ceremony, you got it.. But ya' keep in mind.. If it ain't entertainin' enough.. Or I just don't like what I see..... The Harris Brothers are gonna are cancel it... And when they cancel somethin'... They cancel it hard.
-[[ Storm nods and they turn to walk away, but Jericho speaks up now.. ]]-
[ Chris Jericho ] Hey, Jeff... I didn't get to talk to ya' as much as I wanted to during the meeting... But anyway, about that belt you're carryin' around--
-[[ Jarrett cuts him off. ]]-
[ Jeff Jarrett ] Against you? Never.
-[[ Jericho gets pissed and storms off, leaving Team Canada by themselves... Storm and the others are suddenly approached by Petey Williams and Scott D'Amore... Petey walks right up to Storm.. ]]-
[ Petey Williams ] Lance Storm... A Canadian HERO...... A legend.. I was wondering if I could join Team Canada, since we share so many of the same ideals and beliefs on what makes Canadian wrestlers.. And Canada in general.. Superior...
-[[ Storm looks around at the others..... Then back at Petey. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] No offense, Petey.. But we've got a full house.
-[[ Petey is crushed.. Storm and the others walk right past him, but Awesome has to add his two cents. ]]-
[ Mike Awesome ] STEP ASIDE, BITCH!! YEAH!! FULL FUCKIN' HOUSE!!
Petey clenches his fists and looks really, really angry.
Title on the Line: None
Referee: Mark Yeaton
Winner: Mike Sanders via Pin Fall
[ Vince Russo ] Oh, shit, girl.. Ya' got no idea what you do ta' me..
-[[ Oh.. My... God... Fortunately, before he gets any further, Melina walks into the room with a clipboard.. She looks frustrated with something.. Her eyes wander and she sees what Russo is doing and her jaw drops. ]]-
[ Melina ] WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
-[[ Russo yanks his hand out of his pants and looks surprised. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] Nothin'!! FUCKIN' NOTHIN'!! What are ya' doin' sneakin' up on me!?
[ Melina ] I didn't sneak up on you!! I walked right in front of you!!
-[[ That hangs in the air for a minute.. Russo speaks first. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] Well, shit.. What do you want?
-[[ Melina shows him the clipboard. ]]-
[ Melina ] Jeff wants me to come up with an idea on how to crown a new United States Champion..
[ Vince Russo ] So, what'cha got?
[ Melina ] Nothing.
-[[ Russo seems to think it over for a second... ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] I got it!!
[ Melina ] You do? Just like that?
-[[ Russo laughs. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] I'm a wrestlin' genius, bitch.. I get paid fa' this..
[ Melina ] Whatever.. Just tell me what you have so I can tell Jeff.
-[[ Russo smiles.. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] What I got is... We take four or five guys.. Don't matta' because they ain't what's important.. What's important is tha' big fuckin' dome-shaped cage we put ova' the ring... We put a dome shaped cage ova' that ring.. And we hang a bunch o'fuckin' weapons all ova' the place.. Shit like chairs.. Chains.. Lead pipes... KNIVES.. SICKLES!!
-[[ Melina looks surprised.. ]]-
[ Melina ] Knives and sickles? This is wrestling, Russo... Not legitimate death matches..
[ Vince Russo ] Well, hamma's then.. And brass knucks.. All kinds o'shit... And we make it elimination style.. But the catch is.. Ya' only eliminated if ya' get pinned.. And can't answa' the ten count...
-[[ Melina nods.. ]]-
[ Melina ] I like it.. But what do we call it..... Wait.. I have it!!
-[[ She looks like she's come up with the greatest idea ever... ]]-
[ Melina ] The FREAKIN' FIVE MAN... THUNDERDOME MATCH......
-[[ Russo laughs. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] .........OF DOOM~!!!
-[[ She laughs now. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] I like the way ya' think, babe.
-[[ He puts an arm around her shoulder. ]]-
[ Vince Russo ] We should fuck sometime.
She moves away from
him, looking disgusted and yanks her clipboard out of his other hand.....
Having gotten the plan for the United States title match, she leaves him
to himself...... Russo shrugs his shoulders and sits back down with his
& Jeff Jarrett versus
Stevie Richards & The Blue Meanie
Title on the Line: SGW World Tag Team Championship
Referee: Charles Robinson
Winners & New Tag Team Champions: Christian & Jeff Jarrett via Pin Fall
[ Kurt Angle ] What!? No, no, no!! Where are they!?
-[[ Angle is slinging his clothing and gear all over the room, finally culminating in him throwing an entire suitcase against the wall in the midst of his fury... Angle turns a semi-circle, looking around the room with wide eyes... ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] Where's my damn medals!?
-[[ Angle stands there, breathing heavily.. This has done nothing to sooth the pain of losing his match earlier.. Angle clenches his fists and looks down at the floor... He knows who is behind this... ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] Team Canada... TEAM CANADA!!
-[[ Angle turns around and storms out of the room, running down the hallway at an alarming rate.. People in the hallway scatter out of the way or get knocked down.. Angle is taking no prisoners.. He runs up to the dressing room door that's marked by a large, red Maple Leaf on the front.. He reaches for the door knob and then stops, thinking to himself... ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] Oh no... OH HELL NO!
-[[ And Angle kicks the door straight off the hinges!! Lance Storm, Elix Skipper, Major Gunnz, and Mike Awesome all turn and look at the red, white, and blue monster standing where their door used to be... Angle leans his head back and yells loudly, the battle cry echoing in the small room as Team Canada watches on with wide eyes. ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] TEAM CAN-A-DAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
-[[ Lance Storm is the only one who answers. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] ..Yes?
-[[ Angle looks back down and his eyes run over each member as he marches into the room, spitting as he talks. ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] My medals.. MY DAMN MEDALS!! WHERE ARE THEY!?
-[[ Mike Awesome erupts. ]]-
[ Mike Awesome ] WHY DON'T YOU LOOK UP YOUR FUCKIN' ASS!! YEAH!! UP YOUR FUCKIN' ASS!!
[ Elix Skipper ] Yeah, bitch, all up in ya' ass!! Who's house is dis!?
[ Mike Awesome ] YEAH!! IT'S PRIMETIME'S FUCKIN' HOUSE!! RIGHT HERE!!
-[[ Storm steps past them, ignoring their outburst. He calmly addresses the furious Angle. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Your medals have come up missing, I see.. So naturally, you assume it is the Canadians.
-[[ Angle nods.. Storm continues on. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Blame Canada, of course.. Blame it for everything.. All your problems.. What did I tell you last week?
[ Kurt Angle ] That.. I shouldn't blame Canada.. Just myself.. But COME ON.. I didn't steal MY OWN medals!!
[ Lance Storm ] And of course, that means Team Canada did.. Why, Kurt, do you assume we would sink so low as to steal your Olympic gold medals?
-[[ Angle begins ranting right in Storm's face. ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] Because Canada's evil is oozing all over the United States just like Maple Syrup!! Your goal around here is to show everyone that Canada's got better wrestlers and better EVERYTHING!! Oh yeah, I'm onto you, bucko, and I'm gonna put a stop to you... Because I'll be damned if America's children start pledging allegiance to the Maple Leaf and start putting Mayonnaise on everything... Or enjoy winter eleven months out of the year.. Or listen to Brian Adams all day EVERY day!! OH, I DON'T THINK SO, PAL!!
-[[ He jams a finger in Storm's face. ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] NOT IN MY FREAKIN' COUNTRY!!
-[[ Storm shows no emotion. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] We don't have your medals, Kurt.
-[[ Kurt just stands there. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Leave.
-[[ Kurt Angle turns to walk out the door, but turns back around for a split second. ]]-
[ Kurt Angle ] This isn't over!! This has just begun!! OH, YEAH, IT'S TRUE!!
-[[ And Storm forces Angle back into the hallway.. Angle goes on about his business and as Storm turns around to rejoin Team Canada in their dressing room, he's followed back inside by TREVOR MURDOCH... He stands there with an absent minded look on his face, chewing tobacco in his mouth.. It drools down his chin.... Everyone looks annoyed as hell that he's come in without any kind of invitation.. But hey, it's not like they have a door to the room anymore.. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Can we help you with something?
-[[ Murdoch stands there for a second as if the question has to register and then he begins speaking.. ]]-
[ Trevor Murdoch ] I just wanted yew boys ta' know...
-[[ And Murdoch begins to get emotional.. ]]-
[ Trevor Murdoch ] That I ain't go problem.. Wit' yew guys bein' Canadian..
-[[ Storm places a hand on Trevor's shoulder, trying to comfort him as he begins to weep. ]]-
[ Lance Storm ] Thank you.. The tears aren't necessary.
[ Trevor Murdoch ] I just don't see why they treat yew guys s'damned ugly.. It ain't right!!
[ Lance Storm ] I know.. I know.
-[[ Trevor Murdoch begins sobbing hard, tears mixing with the tobacco drool and rolling off his chin.. Major Gunn looks like she's going to vomit... Storm is trying to not get any on himself.. ]]-
[ Trevor Murdoch ] The way I see it... It's a free country...... An' yew guys can have sex with whoever yew want to!!
-[[ Storm's eyes go wide and Murdoch looks up at Storm with a genuine caring look.. He pushes his index finger into Storm's chest, where his heart would be... ]]-
[ Trevor Murdoch ] Because it's about what yew got on tha' inside.... Not what'che got hangin' 'tween ye' legs..
-[[ Storm just stands there with a blank look on his face as the rest of Team Canada looks on, shocked. ]]-
HOUR 2 ->